"my work now is helping people to optimize performance get a good relationship with themselves finding a peace happiness confidence professor steve peters he's a world leading psychiatrist arguably one..."

"you will come out the other side much better people do recover from broken relationships people don't know what the next relationship will be not everybody is the same what tends to happen is people e..."

"can tell them with honesty there is always a future and things do change and feelings do move and we have to accept that reality we cannot know everything about the person we're with and if our chimps..."

"[Music] professor steve peters he's a world leading psychiatrist arguably one of the most famous renowned and important of our time he's also a doctor and a hugely successful author some of you most o..."

"very close to me he's worked with elite level athletes including steven gerrard and the england football team and ronnie o'sullivan gold medal olympians like sir chris hoy and victoria pendleton as we..."

"groundbreaking concept called the chimp model and it focuses on how there's these kind of three parts to our brain the first part is called the chimp which is our sort of desire to be impulsive and ir..."

"manage and control the interaction between these three parts of our brain and we all have these three compartments within our brains and if you can understand them if you can understand these three el..."

"that i i know i'll reflect on going forward and i know for sure will change my life forever so this is one where i implore you to listen to the entire conversation because i think it will change your ..."

"and the mind interpreting hence i started saying you have this circuitry which is rational logical looking at the facts and you have a circuitry which is emotionally based so it's not logic and emotio..."

"brain just above our eyes starts to think but it thinks in an emotional way so it it reacts to things it doesn't think ahead with consequence it reacts impulsively and it relies on the center of the b..."

"we don't have memory before too because he's not actually functioning and it starts factual memory rather than emotional memory so when you say one in form to chimp the chimp has got all this intuitio..."

"particular circuitry so that's why i picked the chimp but it's seen in all animals and it's it's a defense mechanism to protect you so obviously eating the biscuits a good survival mechanism the fact ..."

"that you say just uh yeah this is where when i looked at this as i said a long time back you start to see that if you ask people which is what i do to put away everything and just get a blank piece of..."

"tells the world that they're not like us and we can potentially fall apart instead of saying actually they're not in my troops it's not important so it's important this is an example of how giving ins..."

"accept criticism from friends we know they're on side but if you start expanding that inappropriately to the whole world then you're going to stress your chin to pieces because what you're saying is i..."

"write down who i want to be yeah um i would say things like i want to be and correct me where i'm that's something wrong here okay because i won't be wrong but if i say i want to be um i want to achie..."

"if you write on a piece of paper the perfect person you want to be so give me some more character traits all the things that come to mind are the impact i want to have on those that encounter me so ri..."

"and say oh for goodness sake stop morning and then afterwards you think well that wasn't very compassionate so i'm not compassionate but that's that's misunderstanding the neuroscience you were always..."

"very critical i expand on two points here because the listeners are going to go up hang on if this is not an excuse model 100 i'm tough on people it's not an excuse model your 100 responsible for mana..."

"systems let's find out who we are what kind of chimp we've got because they're spread and characteristic and then what have we got on our computer i know this is really heavy going no it's not i hope ..."

"it's the chimp that recognizes anomalies and makes us laugh it's the chimp that has intuition we haven't got that the chimp reads body language we haven't got that so human circuits fail so this compl..."

"is only 105 calories and has 26 vitamins and minerals and 20 grams of protein um serves two roles in my life now first thing i do when i wake up in the morning is i have a glass and then at night time..."

"okay you've covered a lot of ground yeah that could be an hour's working so i'm gonna take it back and try and go very steadily to try and drive home there's a lot of areas one is first of all what wo..."

"what your experiences are totally natural unhelpful but natural so many people are going through a grieving process in it could be a significant life event it could be the loss of a partner at the dea..."

"and again if you stop and we'd look at what you've said there are these factual statements or are there impressions and feelings impressions and feelings so we know that the chimp brain is in full flo..."

"future even for people in a much more serious situation where they become uh suicidal um and obviously as part of my work you can tell them with honesty there is always a future and things do change a..."

"with the person and again that's why i don't have this recipe i'm saying discover them but think around but you can offer common things yeah super interesting and it again it perfectly explains why in..."

"with who i want to be i've got this habit now two things i mean just correct yeah sure yeah please who you are who i am not who you want to be yeah that's so important because you know if you get that..."

"sort of train of thinking yeah but um what i'm saying is there's two things that i've started to do the first is i now write in the notes of my phone um statements i know to be true yeah and the secon..."

"meetings i've seen it where i've worked with corporate teams and said just speak what you think but don't judge them they let their chimps out and at the end i say to the person what do you think abou..."

"isn't trying to force an outcome out of somebody and so when i have that struggle it will be lying in a hotel room somewhere at night my brain is going and then i have to speak out loud to kind of cal..."

"confidence in all areas of your life so it's time to just build back up and give yourself time but if you experience that and you go with the floor not engage with it you will come out the other side ..."

"but there's a big fact here the chimp can't deal with some outcomes you can as adult humans we can deal with anything and that's a fact we can put in our computer which will again for a lot of people ..."

"which they also not recognize because people think stress is where we're wringing our hands and panicking and that's not really true stress comes in all different forms and often isn't recognized so f..."

"stress it tends to be they they don't present with stress as such they present with odd emotions so they translate into things like irritability and and when you say well let's look at why you're bein..."

"whereas a lot of people it's more a behavioral addiction so it's a case of getting new behavior work out what's causing the problem and we sort it and they can stop and drink alcohol socially but we h..."

"stop the craving appears i i am i've been saying um when i talk about my business partner dom and he doesn't mind me talking about because he's been as i said he's been on this podcast but he's very v..."

"so and you know most people say oh i'm better for a drink it's interesting that most partners say no they're not they're not so we the brain actually fools itself so so there is a biological basis beh..."

"right thing for the right person quick one as many of you know i've been trying to make my life a little bit more sustainable as it relates to energy ever since i sold my range over sport and bought a..."

"computer's programmed to say don't forget it will unconsciously remind the chimp you need to be in a good place when you walk in because that's what they're going to decide on whether they're there th..."

"easy battle but it can be one it can be one so again habits are not straightforward they need to be subdivided and say let's look at unconscious conscious whether they're linked to drives or they're l..."

"instead of your human saying hang on can i make decisions from a more rational basis than just keep deciding on an emotional basis there's a lot of reflective work that goes into being able to underst..."

"readable and it starts from square one and says let's look at the structure and function in mind then it takes you through this a journey almost through the mind saying let's look at how emotions work..."

"there's nothing you can do with that because it's it could happen so you're stuck with fearing failure whereas if you say i feel the consequences of failure not been able to deal with them now you can..."

"your chimp will immediately go to react but it has to look to the computer and if you've already said it's going to be a good day it will remind the chimp there's no point in stressing it's going to b..."