All Segments
“Dynamo Is Dead!” The Heartbreaking True Story Of Why Dynamo Vanished For Years!
42 segments available
If you enjoy hearing about the power of magic and challenge of creativity, I recommend you check out my conversation with the illusionist, Derren Brown, which you can find here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AVblCpr_qAc 00:00 Intro 3:20 When I Was a Child, My Dad Went to Prison. 6:43 My Dad Asked Me to Engage in Illegal Activities. 13:31 I Hated School; I Was Bullied. 17:43 Magic Was My Escape and My Way of Belonging. 21:23 How Crohn's Disease Changed My Life. 26:28 Becoming a World-Famous Magician. 30:30 I Was So Ill That I Was Vomiting Blood. 35:34 I Didn’t Know What to Do with My Life. 41:09 Self-Harming. 44:53 Hitting Rock Bottom. 46:32 I Tried to End My Life. 51:52 My Loved Ones Saved Me. 54:36 Legal Disputes. 58:38 Are You Still Dynamo? 1:04:51 Therapy Sessions. 1:06:25 Coping Mechanisms. 1:12:01 My Mum’s Toxic Relationships and My Resentment Towards Her. 1:18:21 Your New TV Show and Returning to Magic. 01:27:40 Magic Tricks. Dynamo is back! But not as you have known him before… 'Dynamo is Dead' On Sky Max: http://bit.ly/3RHqSWC Follow Dynamo: Instagram: https://bit.ly/4agid4C Twitter: https://bit.ly/3uTAKDH Sonic rest therapy: https://edcanhelp.io/ The Conversation Cards: https://bit.ly/4amtNew My new book! 'The 33 Laws Of Business & Life' is out now: https://smarturl.it/DOACbook Follow me: Instagram: http://bit.ly/3nIkGAZ Twitter: http://bit.ly/3ztHuHm Linkedin: https://bit.ly/41Fl95Q Telegram: http://bit.ly/3nJYxST Sponsors: Huel: https://try.huel.com/steven-bartlett WHOOP: https://join.whoop.com/en-uk/CEO
Segments Timeline
The Darkness Before the Magic
Dynamo opens up about his struggles with mental health and the moment he hit rock bottom on November 6, 2020, when he attempted to take his own life. He reflects on how magic has been a source of hope amidst bullying and personal challenges, and how he felt the need for the 'Dynamo' persona to die in order for him to heal and rediscover his passion for magic.
"I can't turn off the noise and if I saw myself in a mirror I'd slam my head into the mirror and just keep slamming it to make it go away that's why I Disappeared but it's not the only reason why he di..."
A Troubled Childhood
Dynamo shares his early life experiences growing up in Bradford, England, in the 1980s. He discusses the absence of his father, who went to prison when he was just four years old, and how this shaped his upbringing. He reflects on the challenges of being raised by a young mother and the impact of his father's absence on his identity.
"give you greater context and greater meaning so if you hit the Subscribe button I promise you that we will deliver an even greater version of this show I hope you choose to come along on this journey ..."
The Impact of Absence
Dynamo delves deeper into the emotional ramifications of his father's imprisonment. He recounts how he normalized the absence of a father figure and later felt resentment towards him as an adult. This segment highlights the complexities of familial relationships and the longing for connection amidst disappointment.
"then just never coming back it wasn't until I was a lot older but I kind of understood that he'd gone away and why he'd gone away and you know and I kind of it's weird like I was young enough that not..."
Facing the Past
In this segment, Dynamo recounts a pivotal moment when he met his father at age 19. He describes the shock of his father's request for help with illegal activities, which reinforced his decision to distance himself from that part of his life. This encounter illustrates the struggle between familial loyalty and personal integrity.
"don't feel like he's the sort of person I need in my life right now cuz I've spent a lot of my life trying to avoid this type of environment how long had it been since you'd seen him at that moment th..."
The Weight of Expectations
Dynamo reflects on the expectations placed upon him by family and society, particularly regarding his father's legacy. He discusses the conflicting emotions of wanting to connect with his father while also recognizing the negative influences he represented. This segment explores the theme of identity shaped by family history.
"all I can't really have regrets personally because the circumstance I was in was not of my making you know um I was told by by my grandma that and my auntie as well my aun M they they both would tell ..."
School Days: A Struggle for Belonging
Dynamo shares his experiences in school, where he faced bullying and felt out of place due to his biracial background. He describes the fear and anxiety that accompanied his school days, highlighting the challenges of fitting in and the impact of racial dynamics on his self-esteem.
"depending on where my mom's boyfriends lived or girlfriends um at the time so so I remember there's Del estate and then there's Woodside estate and separating them is a big massive field and then in t..."
The Pain of Isolation
In this segment, Dynamo recounts traumatic experiences from his childhood, including being bullied and thrown into a river by peers. He reflects on the lasting impact of these events on his mental health and how they contributed to his feelings of isolation and fear.
"this kid that had flown to New Zealand from Africa he was the black kid and so he was he ultimately turns to fighting as a way to help him survive yeah I mean he's he's very good at it I've seen him h..."
Finding Hope in Magic
Dynamo discusses how magic became his escape from the harsh realities of his childhood. He emphasizes the transformative power of magic in his life, serving as a source of hope and a means to express himself creatively amidst adversity.
"singing or through acting whatever it might be and then them committing their life to that it's almost like they become addicted to it in some way and it I guess the issue is when you ask yourself the..."
Pursuing Magic Full-Time
After dropping out of college, Dynamo pursued magic full-time, leading to significant life changes. He reflects on his journey to America, his health challenges, and the pivotal moments that shaped his career as a magician.
"keep being inflamed and because it's inside you like you know your gut affects every part of your body you know so and then it has side effects which one of the one of the side effects is reactive art..."
The Rise to Fame
Dynamo recounts his rise to fame, including performing at the Super Bowl and creating the hit TV show 'Dynamo: Magician Impossible.' He discusses the definition of success and the impact of his grandfather's support on his career.
"most of us saw that chapter of your life I believe most of us um through videos on social media stuff on TV and all of that and from there on it really looks like your career starts to take off becaus..."
The Pressure of Success
As Dynamo's career skyrocketed, he reflects on the pressure and expectations that came with success. He shares personal anecdotes about his family's concerns and the balance between pursuing his passion and societal expectations.
"off you're 29 years old 30 years old Everything You Touch has turned into gold and you become this kind of sensation I guess that depends on what you class as like what is success right because for me..."
Health Crisis and Setbacks
Dynamo opens up about a severe health crisis that forced him to halt his tour. He describes the terrifying experience of food poisoning and its complications with Crohn's disease, illustrating the fragility of health amidst a successful career.
"passing um outside of you know my family and my friends um and for me like myo was my biggest supporter for everything but I know that she was always worried about me cuz she always thought that this ..."
The Pain of Crohn's Disease
Dynamo shares the harrowing experience of his battle with Crohn's disease, detailing a severe episode of food poisoning that led to intense pain and hospitalization. He describes the physical and emotional toll of his illness, including the spread of his condition and the onset of reactive arthritis, which left him feeling weak and unable to perform magic.
"pushing the envelope with magic and with everything I do and I felt like that time on the road gave me time to have a lot of new ideas and I felt like I wanted to try and bring some of those ideas to ..."
Trials and Tribulations of Medical Trials
In this segment, Dynamo discusses his journey through various medical trials in search of effective treatment for his Crohn's disease. He reflects on the frustration of having to endure ineffective medications for months, the impact of the COVID-19 pandemic on his treatment, and the eventual breakthrough with a new medication that gave him a renewed sense of strength.
"bowel and from that came the reactive arthritis because in the part of the ball they moved to had different side effects that I never had before MH like I remember like just getting these Sensations w..."
The Weight of Expectations
Dynamo opens up about the immense pressure he felt to maintain his career as a magician while grappling with his health issues. He candidly discusses the emotional turmoil of feeling like an imposter, unable to meet the expectations of his audience and himself, and the existential crisis that ensued when he could no longer perform magic.
"an incredible effect like that gave me a new lease of life I felt stronger I probably felt stronger than I'd felt before I was on it but then Co happened um it stopped my infliximab from working so su..."
Struggling with Self-Hatred
In this deeply personal segment, Dynamo reveals his struggles with self-hatred and the impact of his physical condition on his mental health. He describes moments of despair, including self-harm, and the feeling of being trapped in a cycle of negativity, unable to see a way out of his pain.
"mind what was going on in your mind I didn't know what to do in my life didn't know what to do myself um there's a lot of things that I don't want to fully go into so but I'll try and you know be as g..."
The Day Everything Changed
Dynamo recounts the pivotal moment on November 6, 2020, when he reached his breaking point. He shares the story of how his partner found him after a suicide attempt, highlighting the emotional aftermath and the shame he felt for putting his loved ones through such trauma.
"back then and you know and still at times now I'm a magician who feels like I can't do the first thing that a magician needs to do perform magic so then I'm just an impostor I can't live up to the exp..."
Facing the Consequences
In this raw and emotional segment, Dynamo reflects on the consequences of his actions during his darkest moments. He discusses the shame of being found by his partner and the realization that his struggles affected not only him but also those he loved. This moment of vulnerability sheds light on the complexities of mental health and the importance of seeking help.
"and I kind of wanted the ground to just break open and just swallow me up if I was a fly on the wall in your house at that time what would I have seen a lot of stuff that I don't really want I would w..."
Support in Darkness
Dynamo discusses the importance of support from loved ones during times of crisis. He emphasizes how his wife's unconditional love helped him navigate his darkest moments, highlighting the significance of having someone who truly cares.
"ashamed of because in the moment I felt like I was trying to maybe do something that would take all the problems I thought I was facing and remove them from everybody else's world but I'd not actually..."
The Power of Love
Dynamo reflects on the transformative power of love and support from his wife during his struggles. He shares how her unwavering presence provided him with strength and a sense of belonging that he desperately needed.
"understand how to support someone you know in my life that would be in such a such a mindset I mean I guess what my wife did like not not just you naturally you would call someone for help like a doct..."
Navigating Legal Challenges
Dynamo touches on the legal disputes he faced with his management during a tumultuous period in his life. He explains how these challenges contributed to his feelings of being lost and the need for a fresh start.
"married a long time before then but you know you you just never know what someone's going to act like when really hits the fun and they see you naked yeah and I was exposed I was you can't get any mor..."
Breaking the Cycle
Dynamo discusses the necessity of breaking free from his past patterns to find a new sense of purpose. He acknowledges the importance of change in overcoming feelings of worthlessness and despair.
"think I was at a time in my life where I felt lost and I knew if I you know stayed doing things exactly the same way that I'd always done them then you're only going to get kind of the same results ri..."
The Struggle with Identity
Dynamo shares his internal conflict between his public persona and his true self. He describes the confusion that arose as he grappled with his identity amidst personal and professional challenges.
"assumed that one of the consequences of this separation with your management was you've not you've not been able to use your social media accounts and we've not seen you on the internet as much is tha..."
Finding Purpose in Magic
Dynamo expresses his deep connection to magic as a source of joy and purpose. He reflects on the challenges he faced in sharing his passion during difficult times and the emotional toll it took on him.
"again and even if my arthritis and my Crone stopped me doing it in the way I used to I had to find a new way to share it and there's certain things in the past that I've had to go through negative exp..."
Therapy and Healing
Dynamo discusses his journey through therapy and the support he received from his therapist. He highlights the importance of mental health care and the impact it had on his recovery process.
"partly for some reasons that you know are outside of my control legal related reasons some yeah and yeah sure um you know and then partly because mentally I wasn't free like I need to be free in my he..."
Sonic Reset Therapy
Dynamo introduces Sonic Reset Therapy, a technique that has helped him manage stress and anxiety. He explains how this therapy aids in resetting his mind and improving his overall well-being.
"know and because of things that was going on behind the scenes I also it was really complicated you know um even getting work and then naturally with that you know it's going to come Financial pressur..."
Lessons from the Alcoholics Anonymous Book
Dynamo shares insights from the Alcoholics Anonymous book, which his therapist recommended. He emphasizes that the lessons within can be beneficial for anyone dealing with trauma, not just those struggling with addiction.
"yeah it's you know like it it's been it's been helping me you know I'm sure it will help others um but you know there's lots of different things like one of the things that he suggested to me which at..."
Lessons from the Alcoholics Anonymous Book
Dynamo reflects on the unexpected recommendation to read the Alcoholics Anonymous book, despite never having struggled with addiction. He highlights how the book's 12 steps and personal stories can resonate with anyone dealing with trauma, offering a blueprint for overcoming personal challenges.
"for people who have never read it um I recommend reading it you don't have to be I'm a test you don't have to be an alcoholic to read it and gain something from it um you know essentially it's broken ..."
Understanding Family Dynamics and Resentment
Dynamo opens up about his complicated relationship with his mother, stemming from his father's absence and the negative influences of her partners. He discusses the resentment he felt growing up and how understanding her struggles has allowed him to have deeper conversations and heal.
"kind of written maybe from like a spiritual perspective you know I'm not particularly religious like um but ultimately it's about trying to get you to beli in something greater than yourself to help y..."
Breaking the Cycle of Toxic Love
Dynamo explores the psychological patterns of seeking familiar but toxic relationships, stemming from childhood experiences. He emphasizes the importance of recognizing these cycles and how they can impact one's ability to find healthy love.
"resentment it's not being like surf on the surface resentment like you know i' still see my m at Christmases and but we never really had that the bond that I thought we should have had um but kind of ..."
Finding Magic in Others
Dynamo discusses his journey of rediscovering magic, not just in his performances but in the connections with others. He reflects on how the support from his therapist and friends has helped him see the beauty in human interactions and the importance of community.
"described we we tend to think that we you know we tend to think that if we've been in a toxic situation when we were younger for example that will'll then seek out really really healthy situations bec..."
The Importance of Seeking Help
Dynamo emphasizes the significance of asking for help and breaking the stigma around mental health, especially in working-class communities. He shares his mission to encourage others to seek support and embrace vulnerability.
"speak but but yeah I think I think that I've always looked [Music] for the Magic in the wrong place and what I mean by that is that I've always looked for the magic in me to help me out of whatever si..."
The Return of Dynamo: A New Chapter
As Dynamo prepares for his new TV show, he reflects on the changes in his life and the importance of bringing joy and magic back to the public. He expresses his desire to inspire others through his journey and the lessons learned along the way.
"would highly highly recommend checking out whoop and they very kindly offered our community here under the D CEO a special discount just for you but keep this to yourself if you head over to join. who..."
Burying the Old Dynamo
Dynamo reveals his plan to symbolically bury his old identity as part of his transformation. He discusses the emotional weight of this act and how it represents closure and a fresh start in his life and career.
"in fact feel like I'm feeling it for the first time like Edward Sim my therapist he's a very successful therapist he doesn't need to offer me therapy for free but he wanted to share some of his magic ..."
Using Fame for a Greater Purpose
Dynamo reflects on how he can use his platform to help others facing trauma and mental health challenges. He acknowledges the responsibility that comes with fame and his commitment to making a positive impact on people's lives.
"comfortable doing you know I'm from a counselor State we working class we're like you know you're told if You' got a problem suck it up you know be a man you can't talk about your problems you know li..."
The Power of Sharing Your Story
Dynamo reflects on the impact of sharing his personal journey and how it can resonate with others. He emphasizes the importance of joy, escapism, and imagination in today's world, suggesting that his new show, 'Dynamo is Dead,' aims to provide that much-needed wonder and connection.
"I like I can I'm barely saving my own life for the minute to you know so I don't want to like f it so loosely but you know that like I can save someone else's life no but that's exactly what it does t..."
Burying the Old Dynamo
Dynamo discusses the profound moment of realizing that the persona of Dynamo needed to 'die' following the loss of his grandmother. He explains that this act of burying himself alive symbolizes a cleansing and a necessary step to move forward in his life.
"know that you know that's what people need now and that means we need you now I had the idea obviously to make this show when we first started speaking but when my n died I I realized then that the Dy..."
Facing Fears and Embracing Change
Dynamo shares his feelings of terror and excitement about the upcoming act of burying himself alive. He reflects on how such endurance feats have changed him and how this act represents a commitment to stop being afraid and start truly living.
"tonight after the show plays out live on Sky I'm going to be doing that you're going to bury yourself alive MH in order to kill off the Dynamo identity yeah and yeah I I mean I haven't I haven't put m..."
The Magic of Transformation
In a moment of magic, Dynamo expresses how he has struggled to find the magic within himself over the years. He invites his audience to witness a transformation, igniting the spark of creativity and wonder that he aims to share through his performances.
"tonight after the show finishes you'll be able to see it live but it's not for me it's it's not like a stun it's not an it's not about escaping it's a cleansing for me and I feel like it will be one o..."
A Magical Card Trick
Dynamo performs an engaging card trick with the host and his team, showcasing his skills and the essence of magic. The trick highlights the surprise and delight that magic brings, reinforcing his belief in the power of imagination and creativity.
"yourself alive so that's terrifying but I understand your rationale um and I'm very excited to see what happens Stephen I would like to see some magic if possible is there some magic you can show me r..."
The Heartstring Illusion
Dynamo creates a powerful illusion involving a heartstring, connecting emotions to physical sensations. This segment illustrates his unique approach to magic, blending emotional depth with visual wonder, and invites the audience to engage with their feelings.
"god wow that is unreal Mega crazy don't did bring a SP cars just in case yeah how many packs of cards do you have uh I mean I'm trying to figure it out trying to cut down the two PS of bear oh yeah ye..."
The Magic of Connection
Dynamo discusses the essence of magic as a means to connect with others and evoke emotions. He emphasizes the importance of sharing experiences and how magic can serve as a bridge to understanding and empathy.
"perfect so it's about halfway down I've got a pound coin mhm you want to check it oh I confirm it's a real pound C and I got a little piece of paper I'm going to place this in fact um you can see you ..."