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Do you think they had a conversation before they had a conversation with you?
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Well, they must they must have.
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Cuz it was so choreographed.
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They were like the Backstreet Boys of emotional discourse.
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Done in a real backstreet. In comes Troy.
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Josh, I think Good to see you, man.
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It's good to see you, too. It's been a while.
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Wow, you know, when I see friends that I've known for a long, long time, and I can call you that, I feel good I feel good saying that.
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We've barbecued We've barbecued many times. Yeah, we've had lunches.
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We've had emotional lunches. We've had times.
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We've had we've had girl brunches.
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Josh cried, and then I cried, and then Maggie laughed.
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She's such a little trooper.
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And then they're like, "Do you want to order?" Yeah, I do. I'll have the salmon.
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But when I haven't seen someone I'm really fond of, you know, who's who's been going through it, um like we all have in our own way, um for the first time in a long time, yeah, I get I get I get emotional.
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You know, we all go through it at one point or another, you know. We do.
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And I and I uh I was working with this girl Nikki Lane, and she was uh she she hadn't made a record in 5 years, and and uh she said, "Well, I had to live to have something to write about."
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And so I just I always thought, "Oh, yeah.
1:18
Got to just just keep living, man."
1:20
I know it's very McConaughey, but uh Do you know him?
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Not even in a casual way.
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I met him once in a virtual interview.
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He He asked me to interview him for some for some thing to do with his whiskey, and uh He's got a whiskey?
1:34
Yeah, he's got a whiskey.
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And they introduced us uh uh Matthew, this is Zane. Zane, this is Matthew.
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And the first thing I said to Matthew McConaughey on a virtual call in front of a bunch of people was, "Hey, Matt."
1:42
And he said, "Anything but Matt."
1:45
That was my first So, you're off to the races. Off to a great start.
1:47
Took every tool in my in my box to get out of that one.
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Well, I think my grandpa would have been like, "No worries, Matt. Anyways, we Double down. Manny boy. Matteo potato. Manny boy. You know, you know what?
2:04
It's It's a It's a great obs- it's a fair and and sage observation.
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The life that you live that inspires the art that makes us live our life.
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This is the This is the twist in the tail, right?
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That That you inspire us to go and live the our our life and and I think that um we get insatiable as fans.
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We We like the loop that you're in.
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I like a Queens of the Stone Age every 18 months, you know?
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I like an album and a tour. It keeps me going.
2:28
Um but the absence of the band has made the heart grow fonder.
2:32
And you must feel that now people are hearing the music and seeing shows.
2:36
Well, I think there's a couple things.
2:38
One One of the things is I think that sort of leaping out of the darkness um the surprise, you know, once you make a record, but that that coming out in the way that you come out and and the sort of energy that you're putting out that the pulling and the pushing, the poking, the prodding, that That's all done with love to people who love your fans, you know? And I I enjoy that.
3:02
You need to leave to do that.
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And so disappearing is is really the mainstay of the art of reappearing. It's true. It's true.
3:10
And also, I've known you for many years and and you know, some people uh they're playing and making art to um to gain notoriety or or make dough or or um and and there's a a so many different reasons and all those are fine with me, you know?
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I just for me uh I just want it to be real and that's very vague, but that means has to be vulnerable, honest.
3:39
I need to believe it's true and I need to love it.
3:42
And so I think in some of that hard times and difficult living and and and the sort of hallelujah that comes from surviving that stuff, writing writing the direct directly about that is totally necessary.
3:57
I can imagine in a strange way that during those really tough times when lost a lot of us are lost and are wondering what the purpose is that actually realizing in perhaps with a brief moment that that that is your purpose in that moment to live that experience because it will ultimately end up on a recorder in some artistic space gives you some kind of solace at that moment.
4:16
Like maybe this is kind of part of my job.
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It's definitely it's the job.
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And but but I think moreover, you know, much like the internet is this virtual place. You're on that now? Finally? Actually gave that up. I don't even care.
4:32
You never got on that What are you talking about?
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I was I was for like 6 months and I was I thought this makes me feel terrible.
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Dudesy has a Yahoo account. Yahoo!
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It's bitching to say that's a great word that should be in all languages.
4:45
Even the German should be like Yahoo!
4:49
we can claim that back now.
4:52
I think that belongs to Yahoo anymore.
4:56
I'm just going to take this coolest guy ever and just take his last name and make it my company. Here we are Tesla. Just got to yeah. The Yahoo is like this. Here you go. You can have that back. I'm on yeehaw. com which is yeehaw. It's a dating site.
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It's like farmers and cowboys only.
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That may already been taken.
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Well, what I was saying before I was so rudely yeehawed was uh I yeehawed myself frankly. I I heard you. I yeehawed myself.
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you and you yeehawed yourself, bro. Whatever.
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I've been yeehawing myself up for That's English though.
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Yeehawed We got one out the box, ladies and gentlemen.
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I wondered when it was going to happen.
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Yeah, but what I was saying is that uh you know, there's that virtual space inside.
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It's like when you when you feel when you feel not not so great and you just pick up an acoustic guitar and you're sitting on the edge of your bed and and you have this feeling and you figure it out that sort of virtual space inside that gets that feeling like I think I I think this is it. I think I got it.
6:07
It's it's so like the weight lifts off your shoulders, you know?
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Is there ever too much pain to even pick the guitar up? Well, yeah, absolutely.
6:15
I I I I uh I had a lot of trouble the a agreeing to get involved with this record just cuz it was so much to still to figure out.
6:27
To say the word agreeing would suggest that others were urging you to get involved.
6:31
a little bit of of urging. Who's the most urgent?
6:35
I think um the guys were like, "This is your only way to successfully lift this off of you."
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It wasn't about going on tour and making money and that stuff.
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It was like um "How are you going to be all right if you don't do the thing that makes you all right?"
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feel like a bit of an intervention?
6:54
Was it that Did it get to a point where you felt like the guys were like, "Look."
6:58
Do you think they had a conversation before they had a conversation with you? Well, they must have. They must have.
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Cuz it was so choreographed.
7:06
Well, but it was It was like the Backstreet Boys of emotional discourse.
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Done in a real backstreet. comes Troy. Josh, I think.
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But but set in a real alleyway with by the trash, you know? But I I um That's love.
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That's friendship, though.
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It was delivered in a if not this, then what?
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And and I And we recorded stuff about 2 years ago, but I didn't sing anything till November. I just couldn't.
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And it was It was just Mark uh Rankin and and Mikey and and I, because it was almost like uh someone asked about guests.
7:45
You sometimes you guests, and that's always just to around, really, and just have fun.
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Well, you're you know, you know a lot of good people.
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But when you're going to sing about stuff that's truly uh agonizing at times, you know, it's just you want to do that in the dark alone.
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And when you're trying stuff for the first time, you want to fail by yourself, so that it's not so that you don't add embarrassment to it, too, you know.
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You know, you it's got to get to a point a surface level where embarrassment isn't even an option.
8:15
Well, so many of my lyrics start for the first 50 drafts, they just read like teen goth open mic dream journal.
8:22
You just publish like Dream Syndicate?
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You're like you're like a bad Wayne Hussey.
8:26
I was I was in I was in Joshua Tree once at this coffee place called Jeremy's. It was many years ago. It's not there anymore.
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It's like they had open mic, and there was this kind of, you know, um large and lovely goth teen, and she was she And we're going to have Stephanie come up, and you know, everyone's like And she's just like you, Mom.
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And then she starts screaming and just I was just like oh my And then at the end, I'm looking around, and everyone's like what the and I'm the only one I'm like Oh, awesome.
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And my lyrics start a lot like that. Like that.
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You got to live the life to get the art out.
9:00
That's the headline so far, and I think but I think even you probably weren't expecting it to be so much there to be so much life.
9:05
I do feel that we go in phases of life where there's just a lot going on, and it's and you just you realize you're so out of control.
9:13
Um I was trying to think about about when I feel like the roller coaster came to its natural conclusion, and you had to get off.
9:22
You're back on it now, by the way, but you had to get off it.
9:24
And I do think it was probably not to try to create a start time in trauma, but but Anthony Bourdain and the loss of Anthony seemed to start quite a long period of loss for you. That's exactly correct.
9:37
Uh and uh you know, um things surrounding the Bataclan and that then and um start losing friends and and people, you know, I on and situations and um um and but I I I you know, I never feel like any of that stuff is directed at me or anything like that or I I I don't you know, and I'm not much of a wallower.
10:02
I just There's no why me attached to it.
10:05
No, no, because um because you're here.
10:08
It's you know, I mean, you know, I don't know no one knows the answer to most of the big questions.
10:16
Except I I'm comfortable with why are why are we here?
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And the temporary answer for me is because you are, so get started.
10:24
And you won't it won't be long.
10:24
And but that's been the prevailing element for me is that it won't be long.
10:30
You know, it's okay if Rome is burning and the Titanic is sinking. You will hit the water.
10:34
I'm just saying if the Titanic is sinking, that means free oysters and the bar is open.
10:40
It's cuz I can get one more song in.
10:42
Right, and I'm in the band, so it's like Yeah, hit it, boys. Hit it. Who wants to tango?
10:45
I just feel like yeah, of course you can hit the water.
10:50
And I'm just saying, what do you want to do with the time we have left?
10:52
And and you know, I think that's why I'm not huge on telling people what to do, especially in our music.
10:59
It's like, you know, who you should vote for? Go yourself.
11:02
Because I don't that's not my you know, in fact, I'll turn the lights off and I'll turn the music up so you can whisper about who you really want to be and what you really want to do and I and and conspire, which is a word I love, and create this safe space where you no one tells you what to do. No one stops you.
11:23
All you just All you have to do is not hurt anyone and then you're you can do whatever the you want.
11:28
Like I'm in a we're we're working on this whole tailgating at our shows.
11:32
Heavy metal parking lot style. Yeah. Yeah. You know? Yeah.
11:37
Bringing back willful stupidity.
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Want to do something dumb? Come over to my house.
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That's That's my That's my mantra for all this now.
11:47
You know, I've always loved that philosophy in Queens of the Stone Age.
11:49
There has been very much a pun It's not even a pun.
11:53
It's It's just a genuine reference to a wonderful moment, a come as you are, you know, philosophy in the band. Yeah. But, I know you, Josh.
12:00
You know, there are lines in the sand.
12:02
You know, we spoke We We spoke live on Radio 1 when Nick left the band.
12:06
That was a line in the sand for you. Yeah.
12:10
There have been times we've had conversations where you're like, "Not on my watch. Not in this band.
12:14
Not Not while I'm alive." Yeah.
12:18
And so, I love how open you are to the human experience and allowing people to let their freak flag fly.
12:26
But, I also know you do have a compass. Yeah.
12:30
Well, you know, I have short people that live in my house, you know?
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And I I And I'd like to do the right thing.
12:37
I made enough mistakes in my life that that But, that I always I always think uh you know, I guess I guess, you know, it's important to me that my close people know that we did all we could for each other.
12:56
I guess It's It's that's really the That's where the compass is.
13:00
Well, I wanted to ask you this with that being said.
13:03
That was an emotional night on Radio 1.
13:05
I thought about that the other day.
13:05
That was so crazy that we did that. Yeah.
13:09
We spoke about Nick after leaving the band, the two of us live on radio.
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It was like Especially a year or so on. It's like It was crazy.
13:16
And it And And it was meaningful for fans at the time. Did it help Nick?
13:24
You know, I mean, I think that's the that's the dark mystery question is you just don't know.
13:31
You know, I I I also think that in the case of you know, parting ways with anyone or dealing with something difficult, you in order to be the adult thing is when you're doing something even when you don't want to.
13:46
And and you're doing it in a way cuz when you're a kid, you just don't want to do something.
13:49
You just try not to cut someone off. You move on. Right.
13:53
And you do it in a cruel way often times and I think being an adult is looking someone in the eye and whether it's a relationship of any type, looking someone in the eye and saying honestly what you're going to do.
14:09
And then you need to be willing to listen to someone say, "I get it. you."
14:13
Whatever they They should be allowed to be themselves, too.
14:17
But this is where the truth sits from my side of it and from your side of it.
14:19
We don't have to agree, but we know each other. Yeah. We know each other now.
14:25
Yeah, I think these other there's other forms that are a bit more cowardly and that are actually more hurtful than really, you know, being honest about what you're going to do. I'm leaving. You know.
14:40
And uh And I think you give someone else the chance at least to be themselves, too, since you're saying that's what you want to do.
14:49
I'd like to be myself and and and then trying to give someone else the opportunity to be It's actually true to the philosophy of Ben.
14:56
It actually It actually maintains the principles that you established at the beginning, which is the party's open. Yeah.
15:02
Well, I think I I also think that uh I've really come to understand that uh uh these you have these relationships and when they're based on good communication, which is really what we're where we're at with Queens especially now.
15:16
The communication is better than ever.
15:20
You you sometimes when you're friends are lovers with people, it's like you're living these parallel lives and you're trying to grow together and sometimes you grow apart and if you can actually successfully uh understand that and say, "Okay, we're pulling apart, but I love you, you know, uh then you have a chance at maybe growing back together another time."
15:44
And and you're also saying, "Thank you for the moments we've had."
15:47
And um and I understand I mean, because what was the notion that you thought every relationship that you cared about would go your entire life till you died?
15:56
And if they don't, you're upset?
15:56
I just that's not It's just not fair and it's it's a bit goofy.
16:01
I'm not sure who told you know, me that or or you that, but that wasn't that person's, you know, that person doesn't work here.
16:10
That's an acknowledgement on the record.
16:11
That's definitely comes up a few times in the lyrics.
16:13
This idea that not everything lasts forever and that you've got to find a way forward through it. The words Wow. All right. Yeah.
16:24
The words on this album are so deliberate and so interesting.
16:32
I think it's the best lyrical exercise you've ever put yourself through. Well, thank you. I appreciate that.
16:38
I I I I worked really hard. It took me years.
16:45
Actually, and and and the end in the end it all came quickly like a flash and it was none of the drafts before.
16:53
But it's almost you know, because because it was almost these incorrect drafts that that serviced the pathway to get it right.
17:02
You have to fall off your skateboard a thousand times and then and then you get a kickflip and it's like, "I can do that now."
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This is my religion and I really I need it to be real or so I can do it.
17:09
And I also really want to love it, but part How do I love it?
17:15
I want to love it because it's really honest and it's it's who I really am when it comes to the words.
17:20
And and also like I'd like to and that means being afraid to say stuff.
17:24
It also means just flat out saying things that are strange like voyeurism-gism at times too, which is just hard to do. It is hard to do.
17:34
It's It's the first time Yeah.
17:36
But the first time you're like I'm like I'm really going to say that your your inner child is a spoiled brat. I don't know.
17:43
I just I Some things are just hard to get across your lips.
17:45
And and and and maybe voyeurism-gism is much easier than saying some of the emotional things that are true. Yeah. Like you're terrified.
17:55
And and you know, you just are terrified.
17:58
And but that's that I just, you know, I know that I I would I want to love what what I've made with the guys and in the hopes that it will attract people that really love their music too or love the can love it too.
18:16
Like not being in the biggest band but in the best band possible or that even if it was five people but they but they were saying you saved me and I love it.
18:23
Then I would I would think I would like breathe a sigh of relief, you know?
18:28
It's just so for me it's interesting hearing you sing these words though with the band fired up behind you because the music fired up behind you because there's so much vulnerability and there's so much self-reflection going on here.
18:39
I'm sure a lot of people going to hear this record and they're going to come to a natural conclusion that there's a lot of shade being thrown and this is a byproduct of a very public divorce.
18:47
But I actually hear a lot of self-responsibility going on in here too and a lot of vulnerability going on in here as well.
18:52
I would never say anything about the mother of my kids or anything like that. No, I don't want you to.
18:56
And by the way, I know the mother of your children.
18:58
Yeah, I would never I I just I would never do that.
19:00
And and but but also um and I would never, you know, I I By the same token you must write about that you're your life and and I think you know, I'm kind of soundtracking my life that that I guess that film of your life to use that analogy.
19:19
It's and it's okay to take moments like you know this I can't live as living as a one is the loneliest number.
19:26
Then there's there's, you know, there's all these songs about We will apply those to our life the way we see fit, but they're not about me and they're not necessarily about who Yeah, yeah.
19:35
Right, but but what I'm saying is you know, these songs and the words that go with them are an emotional snapshot where you stop the film, you pull out one frame and and and one song it's like I'm lost and in another one I'm angry and and they and they need to be these these distilled versions of that.
19:54
distilled versions of that. They need to be these honest versions of that, you know, because one drop of true reality is enough you know, it's enough flavor and and I and and uh so I guess I'm just writing about my life as honestly as I can um and I don't worry about what that does from there in terms of
20:17
commentary by others, you know, I I um that's just too much work for me to pretend to care what other people you know, I I think the the love the the hatred and adoration of strangers is like the flip side of a coin and and um but but uh when you're not doing it for the money that that currency is worthless. You sort of, you know, I just
20:42
You sort of, you know, I just I can't get involved in what the people say. Yeah, you can't. I agree with that.
20:48
In a way it's none of my business. none of your business.
20:50
It's but it is a business for other people. Of course of course.
20:54
That's the thing, you know, and it and it is a it's a it's an age-old profession to go and analyze things that people make from a primarily from a heartfelt subconscious space.
21:03
Um and with that and and saying that um you know, I I think one of the things if you asked a Queens of the Stone Age fan up until 4 years ago what their primary observations about Joshua Homme is, that it would be like confidence, powerful, energy, um, you know, uh, don't pity him.
21:25
No pity, no time for pity. Get on with life. Be tough about it.
21:29
Um, but but again, I'm just focusing on the lyrics and in amongst all of the the big statements that that come through the songs is that is that I feel like you've been doing some work.
21:38
Like you have had to take a step back and and pull that armor off.
21:42
Does that Does that make sense?
21:45
Yeah, I mean, I don't think I've ever learned so much in such a short period of time. Can we talk about that?
21:48
Cuz I'm big on the learning.
21:50
At the end of the day, for me this the record what is is is completely about acceptance.
21:57
You know, that's the key, you know.
21:57
Your my friends have passed.
22:02
Relationships have ended.
22:02
Um, difficult situations have arisen.
22:07
Um, uh, I've had uh, my own like physical and health things going on and things like that, but um, but I'm okay now.
22:17
And and um, I'm 100% responsible for 50% of what's going on. You know what I mean?
22:23
Like in any relationship, you're responsible for your half.
22:27
And I I I whether that's friends, lovers, or dog owners, you know, I I I think acceptance, I've always done a lot of big change, but I was sort of the engine of that change a lot of times.
22:40
And so that makes that should big change easier. So I I would say.
22:42
But in in the last, you know, even seven years, you said Bourdain and that's a good start for me is um, I've been through a lot of situations where it doesn't matter if you like it or not, it's happening to you.
22:55
And so I've been forced to sort of say, "Yeah, I don't like this and I need to I need to figure out where where I where I'm at fault here or I'm responsible here or accountable here.
23:11
And also, I need to also accept it for what it is.
23:13
This is the reality even if I don't like it.
23:16
It would be a shame to hold on too tight to something that's slipping through your hands, you know?
23:21
And and and not just accept it for what it is.
23:23
And um I just don't want to do that.
23:26
I think that's the acceptance that this record ended up being about. You know?
23:29
And and and you know, someone else brought up there's oh, there's a uh one song that's very angry and it's like, yeah, well, sometimes you get angry.
23:37
Well, I don't know what you're saying. You know?
23:40
You're saying what you're saying don't do that or it's just you're are you noticing there's one that's angry? you got it in one.
23:46
I think I think this is an album about acceptance and I think that so much of the identity that is we develop from a young age is about control and and guess what?
23:54
Rock stardom and being a really successful musician gives you so much you think you can control, right?
24:00
The illusion is super heady when you're in charge of an organization like that and everyone tells you you're great.
24:05
It's like, oh, I have so much control.
24:07
And then you realize that life has other ideas and it's like, And then you got to come back to the music and figure out what it feels like when you've shed that skin.
24:16
And that's what this album feels like to me, like it's through and through Queens, everything I love about Queens.
24:24
But I just don't feel Can I say this?
24:26
I'm just going to say it. I love you.
24:28
I just don't think you're in denial anymore. Yeah.
24:32
Well, I I I I think it would be impossible for me to deny that I'm sorry if that's too too on the nose and too too No, no, I I think but I also think um this is where I should be.
24:40
This is where I'm meant to be.
24:42
And and um you know, although there's been a lot of difficulty, I'm I'm not sure I would have it any other way.
24:51
Because I wouldn't feel how I felt.
24:51
And also, little things like I got a parking ticket and I was like, I can handle that all day long.
24:57
I I There's There's a lot of things below my pay grade right now in terms of getting me a rise out of me.
25:06
You know, I know I But I I I also think I learned interesting things cuz I've always had these vul- vulnerable moments, but you know, when you're when you're upset or hurt or scared, you know, often times my defense mechanism was like you know, let's cut let come and get me, you know?
25:25
And I still obviously have that in me.
25:27
I'm not But I also um uh I realized you know, I I've been sort of protecting my gentler side thinking I should protect even though it's the larger part of who I am.
25:41
This is what I'm so so fascinating to me and I and it's so nice to be able to hear that and be able to open this door to the conversation because when I first meet you, I was in awe of you.
25:47
Like all everyone who meets their favorite musicians I was a big fan.
25:51
I'm just like, man, let's get to fan out, right?
25:55
It's like the purity of the relationship. I know my place. You know your place.
25:58
You're You're impressing me and I'm impressed.
25:59
And then as I got to know you over time, I realized, wow, this guy is actually just a He's got like a really vulnerable side and he's a really honest guy and he's a really lovely guy and that whole like 6-foot something rock star on stage, the pirate of all pirates, the guitar like, all right, that's great, but that's I know this other guy.
26:18
And it's really it's really cool that like I hear that on the record now and I hear that side of you now. Does that make sense?
26:25
Well, I don't think it was totally absent prior, but I think this has been such a like a um a tsunami of something that just couldn't be avoided now.
26:34
And and I And also, you know, you know, I uh there's this funny thing that's like I before the word surrender really bothered me. It's like to give up.
26:45
I'm like, I'm not going to give up.
26:47
And still something you know, I giving up is not in my I'm not interested in that.
26:54
I don't think that yeah, but it's a different it's a different thing or something.
26:57
but then it's like giving in is totally different.
26:59
And and me thinking oh, I could I okay.
27:08
And feeling really good about that, too, giving in and letting something wash over me.
27:12
And and you know, I've spent so much of my life trying to paddle upstream.
27:18
You know, and then I'm just like, this is my river.
27:20
Why don't I just drop the paddle and go down the rip?
27:21
My it's my you know, I mean, what am I you know, I'm fighting myself.
27:29
You know, a plastic bag on my head.
27:31
It's just I'm not that doesn't make sense.
27:32
I just Plus at the end of it all, what I got from everything is just you know, looking at my littles and and and and uh and my family and my friends and it's just and and being like, I want to live really bad, you know, and I don't know exactly what that means, but it's like even when we played we did the first two shows and and uh I was like, I want to live so bad.
27:59
You know, and and it's a strange and vague like lighthouse light that's like woah woah, I want to live.
28:06
Trying to shine a light on something beautiful that you care about.
28:10
Well, your your senses are wide open, man.
28:12
You're seeing and smelling and feeling and tasting things you I mean, I I and let's not forget that for a large chunk of time when you was touring in the first what I'd call one 2.
28:20
0 of the band, let alone Kyuss and and Screaming Trees and whatnot, dude.
28:24
I mean, this is the band who one of your biggest songs is just a list of drugs.
28:31
Yeah, and and it's a very accurate list.
28:37
But you got to sing that song from a different perspective now, right?
28:38
I mean, Well, I do think that operating in the sort of gallows humor world that I've always lived in where when life is good, it's funny and when life is terrible and terrifying it's really funny.
28:51
Um that sort of has the I feel like that song survives because it's more ridiculous than ever and and the notion that it is um that it really doesn't say yes or no. It's just a list.
29:06
It's just a list, But that's why when it got banned I was like you know, got banned in England right away and it was like our lists are illegal.
29:17
What else is on the list of what's illegal other than number one lists? That's a good question.
29:22
I wonder if you can I wonder if cocaine comes up on the NYT spelling bee.
29:28
Oh, that would be amazing. I wonder if it does.
29:30
Especially can you put it in a sentence that ends inside of my face?
29:38
Yes, I can put it in a prison sentence for you. Five years no parole.
29:44
He's back with new material, ladies and gentlemen. It's Joshua Homme.
29:45
Um I want to get into the making of the record in a second, but but while we're talking about the list, um you know, we've talked about drugs before, man, and I never really felt like you got off them. You're off them now.
30:00
How was the How's it felt to get off them and how has life changed for the better, man? Simple question. Simple life question.
30:06
It's a very simple giant question.
30:06
Oh, well, I you know, for me it's also about like you don't want to be the old druggy at a party. That's weird. This isn't the '60s. I'm I'm not like, "Man."
30:20
You know, I I um I think um it's the natural baton pass of the next phase of my life, you know.
30:27
I just um in that notion of I want to live, it's like I think I've like I don't really smoke ciggies anymore, either.
30:36
It's like I think cuz I've done that enough.
30:39
I've taken enough drugs to kill a small boy and just I think that was my inner child actually.
30:44
No, but it's like I think that's there's no need for Oh.
30:49
Don't get lost in the in the laugh there people. That was real.
30:54
Yeah, but I think it's fine it's fine for me to try other things for a while now too since I did those.
30:58
Like I've got that covered, you know. Yeah.
31:03
And um And you know, I I still have a glass of wine and I still you know, I'm I think Iggy has always been my inspiration. Yeah.
31:13
You know, and uh you know, Iggy will have a few glasses of wine and you know, talking to Iggy about how he went from a junkie that was a pariah where where where people would say, you can do whatever you want but just don't bring it Iggy over here to to someone that really is such a celebrated venerated um uh monument that he is.
31:35
So, I have this I have this term I keep kicking around cuz we're both about to enter into our 50s, right? I just did. You just did? Yeah.
31:41
Yeah, so I'm about to turn 50 and pretty soon and uh I'm excited about it.
31:45
And people are like, well, that's cool.
31:49
It's good because of the choicelessness of it.
31:50
It's good that you You're going to ruin my 50s, bro.
31:58
All right, I just want to ruin the start to them.
32:00
I don't want to ruin the rest of it. You get one day. Yeah. Um Can't I have one day?
32:06
Yeah, cuz uh Iggy kind of sums this up, right?
32:09
Is is he has moved through his life as he's aged with an eye with a with a sense of excellence.
32:13
I look at Iggy and I just go excellence.
32:15
I imagine when he drinks red wine it's really good. It's good. good, right?
32:21
it's like the price tags on it was like $512. What? Why the 12? Where's the 12? Exactly, where's the 12?
32:29
I won't pay a a dollar more than 500. Yes, you will.
32:33
Now, I I I also think that he's done what Carl Jung would call, you know, uniting both sides of yourself, you know.
32:41
He's So, Iggy and I were at Lawry's, the steak place. Prime rib joint. Yeah. Yeah.
32:47
And he'd always wanted to go. He'd never gone.
32:49
And we're like we're like oh, it was amazing. Yeah.
32:52
And um and uh any huddles, we'd go to the goddamn Lawry's and um he's wearing just a vest with no shirt underneath, which is already a bit risqué for Lawry's where the first time I went I had to wear a men's mustard-colored jacket. I was so stoked. They gave it to you?
33:13
Yeah, they're like to go in here you have to wear and I was like no.
33:15
And I was like oh my god, this thing's Congratulations. You won the PGA tour.
33:21
Yeah, that's basically he screwed him and Gavin just wrote it.
33:26
Pick up your pots, would you?
33:28
Well, maybe I might just HAPPY GO OH MY GOD.
33:32
ANYHOW, SO WE GO IN there and Iggy is uh he just at one point was like he goes, "Is it hot?" And I was like, "No."
33:41
And then he just takes off his vest and puts it on his jack he's got no shirt on in Lawry's and he picks up the steak and he's just eating it with his hands and I and I was like that was a goddamn best thing I ever saw in my life.
33:54
Cuz he was just I'm he was being himself.
33:57
It wasn't hurting anybody.
34:01
He was just like, "I'm like this and uh he wasn't giving two wooden And they came over there the manager comes over and he goes, "I'm really sorry to say this to you, but could you please um there's a it's a health code violation for you to have, you know, your nipples out basically at dinner."
34:25
It was like uh and he was like, "Whoa, so I'm sorry I'm sorry about that, of course."
34:29
And he just went back to eating the steak with his hands.
34:31
It It made me fall in love with him all over again.
34:35
Cuz he was gentle and sweet. an act of rebellion.
34:38
No, it was like, "I'm going to do me until somebody says I can't, and then I'm going to decide if I'm okay with that." Yeah. Yeah.
34:45
And if it's done in a res- if the request is respectful, I'll probably, you know, I will listen to your side and put on my vest. You know.
34:55
And I just I love that because he's sort of elegantly being himself. Yeah. You know.
35:01
Or as Oscar Wilde said, "Be yourself, everyone else is taken."
35:04
My mom always used to say that to me, and that's the first time I've ever heard it quoted to Oscar Wilde, and it it makes me really happy that my mom was was flinging Oscar Wilde at you. Yeah.
35:14
Such a catty Not your mom, Oscar Wilde. Sorry.
35:17
Want to be really clear right there.
35:20
She'd probably go, "No, you had me at one."
35:24
Hit the explosion, would you? Yeehaw.
35:28
I'm so open to all that now, man.
35:28
It's like, when I was a kid, I wouldn't have know what to do with that.
35:32
when you're a kid, you're not supposed to know anything.
35:33
You're just supposed to see everything. Yeah. You know. Yeah.
35:37
And I I do love I do love the aspect of music that is childlike, where it's like, "Do you want to play with me?"
35:44
I mean, we're still saying like guys are like, you know, "Hey, do you want to play with me?"
35:48
And at times you think, "Not like that, but like that." Yeah.
35:55
And and but I just I think it's nice to use these same use the same lexicon that I would have used when I was five in order to be yourself. You know.
36:08
I was so sad to hear about Mark, man.
36:10
I've told those stories I've told those Mark stories so many times.
36:12
Remember that time that we sat in in XFM, and we're all smoking cigarettes.
36:17
I used to smoke back then, too. Do you remember?
36:19
Do you remember what Mark said? Do you remember?
36:21
We both got up, and even you were like, "Mark, listen, they're exiting the whole building. We kind of up.
36:26
This is like 300 people have to go out under Leicester Square cuz we were smoking cigarettes and we were ready to go.
36:31
The fire marshal's outside and Mark is sitting on that wooden box and he's finishing his cigarette and he looks up. He didn't look up.
36:37
He just goes, "I choose to die."
36:42
I remember we walked by like a fire person, too, and they're like they're like, "Did you see anybody smoking or any smoke up there?"
36:48
And he's and Lanegan was like, "I don't know that whoever it is that son of a Do you remember the story you told me once?
36:57
You probably told it other people where you were having that real private conversation with him backstage at Reading or somewhere and some kid was sidling up behind his his shoulder. Do you remember that? Oh, what? The soul? That that one? No, that was a Oh, yeah.
37:10
And then the kid rolls up and he goes, "Man, I'm such a huge fan of your music. It's changed my life."
37:14
And Lanegan's looking he goes, "So?"
37:21
The best the And then he just looked back at me and and I looked over the kid and I just like like so deflated just like turning off the thing in front of the oil change place just like we're It's the worst, but it's the best.
37:36
Oh my god, but but if you're going to It's like being insulted by John Lydon. Yeah.
37:40
Like Johnny Rotten where you're just like, "Uh thank you." Yeah.
37:43
It's like the Macho Man Randy Savage coming up to the and go grabbing your arms and go, "What are these?" "What are these?"
37:50
The you know, the the the glory and the pain is is there, you know.
37:55
Didn't you weren't you having a private conversation with him as well and some kid was just milling about for 20 minutes trying to pluck up the courage to come up and tap him on the shoulder and took one finally plucked up the courage and took one bold step towards you guys and he went, "No."
38:06
He goes He goes He goes, "No."
38:10
He said it like he said it like you already know.
38:15
And there was also time where two of that band Trailer the and you'll know it's by Trailer the and the drummer kid, I think his name is Jason or something.
38:24
Anyways, um he's kind of hyper at the time. It was many years ago.
38:29
And on Songs for Death tour and Lanegan Lanegan ends up beating him up, right?
38:38
They get in a fist fight and Lanegan kicks his ass.
38:41
Flash in the alleyway in this puddle of water in the alley puddle, which is you decide so dealer's choice of what's the liquid.
38:51
Anyways, next morning I'm talking to Lanegan and he's you know, going god damn the thing with this and I'm laughing because that was my job is to just enjoy his crotchetyness, you know, which I did well. I did my job on that.
39:04
And the kid Jason walks up and goes, "Hey man, I'm really sorry I said all that stuff to you last night."
39:12
And Lanegan's he doesn't even look over and he goes, "Yeah, I'm sorry I kicked your ass."
39:14
And it was we're What do we What about these sandwiches? They're broken.
39:20
You know, he just moved on.
39:23
It was another moment the moment he was up out of his mind and perhaps I was too.
39:27
It was the morning so there's no business still being that way.
39:31
And he he's kind of out on the couch and Joey is making a sandwich and and and Lanegan just sits up like Dracula like, you know, rises and he looks over at Joey and goes, "Where'd you download that sandwich?"
39:48
And just can't get like that out of my mind.
39:50
You know, but that's the thing.
39:52
See, I think this is why I don't like to tell people what to do because I have had the blessing, the luxury, the pleasure of being But I say that to my kids if they're walking even though I don't want a sandwich.
40:08
I often say to people, you know, or even just to to throw them off your scent emotionally where someone walks and it's like, "What can I get you to drink?"
40:16
And you look at the person next to you and go, "Where'd you download that sandwich?"
40:18
And then everyone's like, "What the do I do?"
40:21
You're like, "Give me a goddamn drink is what you do. I don't know."
40:22
But I've had this luxury this and this pleasure of being around these truly idiosyncratic what certainly would be diagnosed today as like needs help sort of folks.
40:35
But I never in various states of sobriety and being and understanding and and uh and I I've never sought to say like, "You know what you need to do?"
40:49
I mean that's I That's why letting people go in those situations been really hard for to get my head around because I don't really tell people what they're You see You know what you need to do with your life?
40:59
And it feels like having to take that step and parting ways in a harsh way it needs to be very serious for me to do that because I don't know what you should do.
41:09
And plus I'm just enjoying you and accepting you for who you are cuz we're in the business of taking almost our mental health issues and turning them up.
41:19
Like, you know, you've got trauma? Turn it up.
41:22
You know, I just that's what we do here.
41:24
And but it's a but it is a way to get it off your chest and off your shoulders.
41:29
If you do this with that kind of honesty, you can actually become a better person, I believe.
41:34
And you can get rid of that baggage and sort of be like, "Well, it's yours now."
41:39
You know, which is a bit of a diss, I suppose, but it's also done in a loving way, you know.
41:45
And um you know and that's why And the thing I can't control is all this part of it.
41:49
So, I don't really try to control especially now, I don't even try to control it at all.
41:55
control it when our friends get sick and we can't control it when when love disappears.
41:59
We can't These are things we just cannot control.
42:00
And you know, my my therapist said something to me cuz I was going through a lot of change in my life and I was been a total mess about it.
42:09
And he was like, "Yeah, you you you're a real classic walking talking exercise and trying to control the uncontrollable.
42:14
And I said, "Yeah, yeah."
42:16
And he said, um He said, "Think about change, man, is uh you're always one step behind."
42:23
No, that's the Joshua homies.
42:26
Yeah, well, and and and also, you know, I've just I'm a bit of a nowist, so I I try to get lost in the moment because um I know it's fleeting, you know, and the past is the past, and 5 minutes from now is always 5 minutes from now.
42:39
And and at times I've gotten too immersed in the moment where I have it's uh it's been ultimately maybe selfish because I'm just so where I am, not thinking about anything with the blinders of stuck in the now.
42:52
I love to appreciate what's going on, and I and with so many people lost, you know, um I'm glad I got to appreciate those moments, and I uh I still can I still get to love them, you know. I still get to do that.
43:10
I I um uh I still get to love them even though they're not physically here.
43:15
I still get that chance, so I I like talking about Mark.
43:19
I like talking about Rio.
43:19
I like talking about Tony, you know, and you know, for me, I like talking about Taylor.
43:26
It's There's There's There's 11 of them now in in the last 2 years, and and um but that's okay because I still get to love them, you know.
43:37
So, and that will have to do.
43:39
Yeah, cuz we're all going to hit the water.
43:41
Yeah, we're going to all going to hit the water.
43:42
I'm still like more oysters.
43:47
And I'm like, "Play something else. Don't play that again."
43:53
This is not the last song I want to hear. Try something else.
43:56
Well, but I I, you know, someone was saying, "Well, that seems quite negative."
43:59
And I was like, "Well, I don't think so at all.
44:01
It's just very realistic and very that be negative? I I don't know.
44:05
We be ignoring mortality in our 50s, I don't think so.
44:08
it's a very positive, you know, cuz it's just like admitting what's going on. Yeah.
44:12
And and that's the first key to accepting something.
44:13
It's saying, I I hate it, but I get it.
44:17
And it's also not in keeping, as we established before, in in in what the job description was.
44:21
The whole like that's what I meant about denial.
44:23
I wasn't being so specific to you.
44:24
I was saying anybody who goes out there and plays in front of tons of people and and their whole life revolves around making art and being judged on it and making money from it.
44:34
This is a whole job description is to go through life being to some degree in denial. That's the whole point.
44:41
Isn't that That's the point. Absolutely.
44:43
Well, or just you know, denial by proxy like almost like, well, I'm going to try to overcome it anyways.
44:48
I just think that the drawback here is that if if people again, like I said, the adoration or hatred of of strangers is a tough thing.
44:58
I try I try to like you know, I love our fans and and and I but um if someone thinks I'm the worst thing since sliced bread or the best thing since sliced bread, I know it's not true, you know.
45:08
I just don't ever worry about that.
45:11
Well, they're out to get you anyway. Yeah.
45:14
The kids, the man, the chicks, the brakes. Yeah.
45:18
And as far as I'm concerned, if I was you, I don't care what you say anymore.
45:23
Yeah, that's the Doesn't matter anyway.
45:24
At least you know it's real.
45:24
And I think at the end of the day, like I said before, for someone else to love it, I need to love it.
45:31
For someone else to for it to do something real for someone, it has to be real for me.
45:36
So, how could I write about anything else but the like most aggressively raw sections of my own life?
45:44
I I don't think I'm I'm I'm supposed to do that. That's the job. Yeah, that's the job.
45:48
is to translate the pain. Yeah, that's the job. That's the job.
45:51
And find the hallelujah in it, you know. Yeah.
45:54
You know, and then go out on stage and watch people react to it in real time.
45:58
I loved watching you applaud.
46:01
I loved watching you at Boston Calling, finished the first two songs and and immediately clapped. Well, they were so good.
46:07
It was such a beautiful night. I was glad to be there.
46:10
It was just It was just so It was such a simple gesture for me to see it.
46:14
Um I mean, to start with Misfit Love, first of all, you.
46:19
It's so brutally brilliant.
46:21
Well, that That feels good because that's the band I would like to be in if I could.
46:24
It's the band that plays that.
46:26
And so, I think you have to It's like setting the table like how do you come out and say, "Who do I wish I are?"
46:32
And it's like, "I are this, you know."
46:34
Yeah, it's it's the perfect combination of the desert and Bowie I think you've ever captured.
46:37
It's that perfect just that like, "Whoa."
46:39
Bowie at his most like robot like like very Germanic.
46:45
Don't you miss having Bowie around? And Prince.
46:48
And I I I didn't know him at all, but and Lemmy.
46:51
You got just miss I miss my Bowie time.
46:56
Yeah, you know It made it sound like Tommy time like like a child.
46:59
Well, it kind of was though.
46:59
It was like, "It's in my tummy and it feels weird."
47:03
That's what Bowie is to me.
47:03
Bowie even when I listen back to like Let's Dance or that album or whatever, which was Bowie at his kind of suited and booted stadium-filling biggest. Yeah.
47:17
It still feels like China Girl is just a weirdly strange song. That's a Nikki song.
47:23
It's a Nikki song, that's right. You got it.
47:25
Yeah, but there's the the even the last thing.
47:27
Modern Love is a strange song.
47:27
I don't want to got I want to start getting things done. Yeah.
47:32
It's just It's just so that whole era and so and so if that's his most successful commercial, quote unquote, Yeah.
47:39
the rest of it is just the weirdest success story ever.
47:42
It really is because it starts from an art place, such a heavily art place.
47:46
And for me, I don't feel that a lot of stuff is starting from an art place, too, especially because of the internet.
47:51
People want to blow up and Yeah, it's like attention first, attention currency first, and maybe gets artistic later.
47:58
And instead of you know, and and uh where you know, you need to emerge fully formed when you're on the internet.
48:03
It's just like it already needs to be done.
48:06
This or you'll have your growing pains shoved in your face on YouTube for the rest of your life.
48:11
I can't imagine like like kids that are like nine like I'm going to pair I know I'm going to pair this apple and and just having to deal with that when you're 25 where you're like Jesus.
48:22
You know, I am you know having that held up in your face is really strange.
48:28
You were in the desert figuring it the out.
48:30
I mean Well, no one told you you were wrong.
48:32
So, you do something you're like is this right?
48:34
And someone's like I don't know.
48:36
Yeah, which is a great thing to have happen is just someone to deny knowledge.
48:42
You know, so you experiment on your own, you know.
48:44
I've been collecting vinyl.
48:44
That's my big midlife crisis.
48:47
Baggy trousers and vinyl. It's pretty mellow. It's pretty mellow.
48:49
And uh it's well, what a revolt. It's been a good one. My wife's very happy. This is you're good.
48:57
You have a lot of pockets.
48:59
How are you putting vinyl in your jeans?
49:01
Sometimes it's like I don't feel like I'm wearing even wearing trousers. It's awesome. Today's a rare day.
49:03
I wore jeans just for you. That's called the skirt. It's just one leg.
49:08
Well, I knew if I wore my regular trousers you'd have first thing you would have said to me after four years is what are those?
49:14
What are you smuggling potatoes? I couldn't bear it.
49:16
You know, when you're 19 you're like I wonder if I could change the world.
49:18
And then you're like well, at least the world that I'm in right now.
49:24
Yeah, at least these 100 kids and these people in the desert and yeah.
49:27
And and I think there's something wonderful about the gift of nothing, right?
49:31
So so the like the Oh evacuate the building. Lanegan, get out.
49:40
No, just the the the freedom to fail and um the lack of influence, you know, I uh and uh saying I wonder if this is right. It feels right.
49:52
And just letting that be enough, you know, moving at the speed of inspiration and just um being okay with that, you know.
49:58
I I There's something gentle about that that's cool.
50:03
I think learning should be gentle or people don't want to do it, you know.
50:07
You show me a piano player who is gets hit with a ruler by his piano teacher and I'll show you someone that doesn't play piano. Facts.
50:14
And I just think in general learning should be gentle like that.
50:16
To So, you're includes your including people. Yeah.
50:22
Getting them excited about it. That's what it was.
50:23
It's like you guys were figuring it out in real time.
50:24
And and also, you know, you you were already broken.
50:27
That's what's so great about Kyuss is that the sound everything about it was not right, which is why it was so perfect. Yeah.
50:35
It was so heavy and deep and just raw and powerful.
50:39
Using the wrong doing the wrong over and over.
50:41
I guess it were like two wrongs don't make a right, but 40 wrongs make a weird.
50:46
40 wrongs make it perfect.
50:46
I mean, I I I highly recommend that while we're embracing this new Queens of the Stone Age era that we go that you do go back if you listen to this podcast and um really immerse yourself in where it began because um those albums just age beautifully, bro.
50:58
They are wrinkled and aged, but they are lean and I still wouldn't with them.
51:03
I If I saw Kyuss drinking in the bar right now and I thought I could take that old man, he'd have kick my ass in an alley in a puddle.
51:10
Well, we were brutal It was a brutal It was also a brutal place.
51:13
I realized how I grew up in a culture of violence, too.
51:16
It's just like I realized how brutal things were.
51:19
You play a You play a generator party where there's no law, no adults, and kids do all the extremes in one night.
51:26
They beat each other up, they make out, they they have sex, they drink, and they do it all at the very extreme level, you know.
51:34
And it was often times it was terrifying to go there.
51:35
You'd get butterflies, you know.
51:37
You turn around this canyon and all these fires would be there. It's Mad Max.
51:41
It's the guy on the front of the truck. terrifying.
51:45
It's like dude, IT'S LIKE SKANGER.
51:51
BUT THAT'S WHAT IT FELT LIKE THAT that like witness me just all that all that made so much sense to me the first time I saw I was like, oh, where are you from? Are you from the desert? Yes, look.
52:06
Yeah, they're they're from a harsher desert than even your desert, I think.
52:07
I mean, the Australian desert is like Oh, it's brutal.
52:12
I mean, you got to drive 65 hours to get from Sydney to Melbourne.
52:14
There's nothing in between.
52:15
But that's what you learn in the desert quickly is that everything there kills you.
52:21
And even the plants are like, get the off of me. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And and don't eat me.
52:26
And at night everything really comes out.
52:29
Which I I always felt like Kaius in the party scene there, too, was like that.
52:33
It was like actually all the big animals come out at night.
52:36
That's when you really need to watch your ass.
52:37
Everything is nocturnal cuz I did you witness the day?
52:41
It's just like everyone's being baconed.
52:45
frying This miracle life, dude.
52:46
I mean, I I've said this over and over again.
52:49
It's a mantra for me because I'm I'm catching up with people now making their 10th, 15th, 20th record.
52:56
I feel like this one I saw Dave the other night off the record.
52:57
We had this we just had this night where we ended up being in the same room and it was beautiful and I felt so grateful just to still be around and for him to be around and you to be around and like, dude, you know, we've known each other more than 20 years. I love Dave so much.
53:13
You know, and he's been through so much, too.
53:18
Um and everyone goes through all this stuff, but to go through it even as terrible as some of it is, you go through it at the same time, it's good to have because that tells me we're growing together naturally in the right same direction, you know?
53:37
And I just uh you know, I I I just value that stuff.
53:43
Uh And it's not that I value it more than ever, it's just that I'm aware of it more than I'm I'm aware of the size of it now.
53:50
Before it's like you pull back the curtain you're like, this is thank god this is here.
53:55
But now it's like pull all the curtain back.
53:57
Want to see how far this goes, how much this care is, how much I Because for the first time, I feel like in your life as someone who knows you a bit to be able to say this for reasons traumatic and difficult as well as ultimately part of life that may lead to some form of reward, you had to stop. Dude, you never stopped. You never stopped.
54:18
really matter what it was either. I never stopped. stopped.
54:20
Do you Well, but there was no reason to.
54:21
There was no reason to stop and and that's good things, bad things, all things.
54:24
I just I, you know, and also, you know, I like um I like a brick wall and thinking through it, over it, under it, around it.
54:34
Which one are we going to do?
54:37
But I don't ever think we're stopping here.
54:38
And so I like but after years of running through and around and over, you know, you start to drag a leg and you start to go slower and it's like uh um and emotionally you do that too and and and philosophically you do that too.
54:53
I just started to feel very in my own way cuz I never stopped either in my own way.
54:56
I just started to feel very full up.
54:58
And I And that was the first time I realized that actually we are finite.
55:03
Cuz we talk about the mind and all this stuff having infinite possibility, infinite space.
55:05
And I was like, damn, I don't have a lot of space to ingest good stuff. Yeah.
55:10
I got to download some shitty stuff. Yeah. I got to stop. I got to clear out.
55:14
Right before the Iggy record, excuse me.
55:16
Um I went saw this guy for the first time and he took my blood and all this stuff and he was telling me about my blood type and he was like, dude, he was like, based on your blood type you like to give give give and you don't like to take. And I was like, yeah.
55:32
And then he's he said, what I'd like you to do is I would like you to I think you've probably accepted and agreed to do some about five or six things just out of wanting to agree because you like the person even though you don't want to do them, but you've agreed to it.
55:47
I'd like you to go home and cancel all five of those things.
55:51
Is that like in Wait, that was That's like right before the Iggy record.
55:55
And also, didn't you call me up after that and cancel lunch? Five times. Yeah, all right.
56:06
I'd booked five lunches cuz he always canceled them and he canceled them all in one go and I never understood why and now I realize.
56:11
No, I had my people do it. But so I did.
56:15
I went home and I and I put I I canceled these five things and and he said, "You need to create space for the right thing to come in." There it is. All right.
56:24
So and and uh There it is.
56:26
And because I'd never been to a doctor and I was like, "Well, I'm here, so I'll probably listen to him at least once, right?"
56:31
And he did and then 2 weeks later Iggy called me.
56:34
I was like, "Do you you want to work together on make a" And I was like, "Okay, now I have no other I that's my only metadata for if that works or not.
56:44
But I was like, it did work so much so that I was after the Iggy record, I was like, "I don't know what to do now."
56:53
Because I that's the pinnacle for me.
56:55
I always felt like there was trust there was trust issues when it came to that sort of when it came to that sort of stuff. Like, I've got this.
57:00
Like it was like, "I've got this. Don't worry about it. I got this."
57:04
Well, I think my thing is always like panic breeds panic and confidence breeds confidence and I think you know, if we're if we're you know, if you're leading people, you have to have somewhere to go and you you don't morale is everything.
57:20
In a in a in an art collective thing or well, in general, morale is everything.
57:25
And um certainly if um I I think any of the roles that people play are more or less important.
57:31
It's just they're so all so vital to for the gestalt of the whole thing, you know?
57:37
And I I um but if it's your job to sort of steer the ship even though you didn't build it, you don't put up the sails and all if you're it's your job to steer, then being like panicked even if you feel that inside, it's not good to show that.
57:51
That's what I understood.
57:53
And we'll try to give direction. Right.
57:55
And and yeah, and and like um it's important to in the tough situations maintain your composure, you know?
58:05
And so I think often times that made me sort of not acknowledge when I was feeling like, holy Oh my god. You know? And that's cool. It got me here.
58:15
I'm I'm I'm cool with that. You know?
58:17
It's not what I use necessarily now. But I'm good with it.
58:23
Well, this album is um more than any fan could ever have hoped or expected.
58:28
Um because it's it's right up there with the greatest you've ever made. I mean, Oh, thank you.
58:34
you know, you're you're long down the road with this band and and dude, I mean, I've I always said there's only two or three artists in my life that have never let me down.
58:41
And um you know, from And I've let you down and entirely.
58:45
No, no no no room for our usual sense of our usual game of table tennis with the jokes.
58:51
Like genuinely, you know, every one of your albums has has has delivered um I feel that way about Deftones, too. They never let me down.
58:59
Yeah, they're they're serious, dude. show up every time. You know what I mean?
59:05
And um the fact that you're here and you've made this amazing album with your friends um and start to finish, too.
59:10
It's like negative space. Like when you psh Yeah.
59:13
It's just Oh, man, it's like, come on.
59:16
I guess the music side to you know, you're just chasing a good feeling.
59:20
Like you you talk about that chorus going It's such a simple thing, right?
59:23
Just could go heavy on the crash and it just works. Right.
59:27
And and and everyone goes boom boom boom.
59:29
And and so you're chasing a good feeling.
59:31
You go that wow, that feels really good.
59:34
And then the question is well, what are you going to do over that what are you going to sing over that or what or are you going to say what you know, but it does start with just chasing a feeling.
59:43
You know, just trying to catch up to a good feeling.
59:46
Trying to run alongside a good feeling like hey you know, and I I but I think that's good.
59:50
I also think like just wanting to chase a good feeling. That's just good enough.
59:55
God, especially when you've been at a point in your life when you're not sure where you the chase even begins like Dude, I I I know it, man. You've been there. I've been there.
1:00:03
We recognize that in each other now.
1:00:04
We can talk about that off the record sometime, you know, it's at that when those points when you're like I don't even know if I'm ever going to find a feeling worth chasing. Again. Yeah.
1:00:14
And I and I'd take it a step further.
1:00:16
It's like Um when you're in moments where you're like I don't think I'm going to make it.
1:00:23
You know, and you're just like ah this is that feeling.
1:00:27
Like I used to be really upset at Tony for what he did, you know, Bourdain. I was upset.
1:00:31
Um and then all of a sudden I found myself going like ah Oh, yeah. I got it. I got it. I get it.
1:00:41
And um and but then I go back to that brick wall. It's like but this.
1:00:48
I'm going to go I'm going to go through it.
1:00:49
I'm going to go around it.
1:00:51
Um I'll go under it cuz I just I never had that feeling before like I don't think I'm going to make it, but I've had it now.
1:00:57
And I've had it in a multitude of situations in a very tight time frame like a couple years, you know, but I um but I'm also thankful for that too now because that that making it through told me that I can make it through, you know, like I can and I I also would say that to somebody else.
1:01:17
It's like just try to make it through and when you do you'll know it's true. God damn it. Yeah. Yeah. You can.
1:01:25
and then I cried and then Meggy laughed.
1:01:27
She's such a little trooper. Yeah.
1:01:28
That's all right, though, bro. That's all right.