0:00
And the challenge I always give to my audience is think about someone you really adore and really love.
Search this video
0:05
Just absolutely are spectacularly faithful about.
0:08
If they were putting in their body what you're putting in your body, what would you tell them?
0:11
Cuz whatever that is, tell that to yourself.
0:16
Hello everyone, welcome back to On Purpose.
0:19
I'm so excited for this episode.
0:21
I know that you are focused on growing your purpose, growing your passion, and improving your life, work, and love every single day and every single week here with me.
0:30
And I'm always trying to find guests that I believe can truly help you transform that.
0:34
Today's guest is someone that I've admired for a very, very long time.
0:38
I've been a follower and fan of his work for a long time as well.
0:42
So, I'm so excited to have this opportunity to sit down with him here in New York City and ask him about his thoughts, his background, and his story, and of course, his purpose.
0:50
He doesn't really need an introduction.
0:54
He's a multiple New York Times best-selling author.
0:56
He has an incredible show on TV. He's none other than Dr. Oz. Dr.
1:00
Oz, thank you so much for this opportunity.
1:04
It's a great pleasure to meet you, Jay.
1:05
Yeah, it's a pleasure to be with you.
1:07
Thank you for inviting us into your space and and allowing us to gatecrash.
1:12
We fixed the feng shui for you.
1:14
Got the whole studio back This is the back part of the studio.
1:15
It's working but it's working. It works for us. It works for us.
1:17
And I like I said to you just before we started, I've been a long-term fan and admirer of your work.
1:22
I think it's incredible what you've done.
1:24
And so, again, I'm very grateful for this opportunity.
1:28
But I want to start by helping my audience just learn about you as a whole.
1:32
I just find people's stories fascinating and I think as people grow and continue to have incredible careers, people who find out about them later on don't get to see that side of it.
1:41
And so, I'd love to go back to 7 years old when you actually decided you want to be a doctor, which seems very, very early.
1:51
What sparked that in your life?
1:53
So, the name Mehmet is Turkish. Yes.
1:56
name Oz is my real last name.
1:56
It has two dots over it in Turkish.
1:58
My parents were immigrants to this country.
2:01
And my father is a physician.
2:01
Just passed actually, 93 years of age.
2:05
And when I was 7 years of age, we had moved to a town, Wilmington, Delaware. We were foreigners.
2:09
I mean, didn't understand the culture.
2:11
I didn't know some English words even though I was speaking English with all my friends in school.
2:17
And as an outsider, my dad was trying to pass along things to me that he thought might be helpful as as I grew up.
2:20
And we were in an ice cream shop. It's a shop.
2:23
I'll never forget it's called Pat's Ice Cream.
2:25
They had the best vanilla fudge.
2:27
So I'm waiting for my ice cream.
2:27
And there was a kid in front of me who was about 10 years of age.
2:31
And this young man was just minding his own business trying to get to his ice cream.
2:33
And my dad asked him what he wanted to be when he grew up.
2:35
And the kid looked back and he said, "I don't know. I'm 10 years old.
2:38
I haven't thought about it." Makes sense.
2:40
Yeah, makes very rational.
2:40
I thought it was pretty good answer. Kid moves on.
2:42
My dad turned to me and said, "I never want to ever ever hear you give an answer like that." And I said, "Why?"
2:50
And he said, "Because if you don't know what you're aiming for, you can't possibly head in that direction."
2:54
This gets back to the very fundamental meaning of the word sin. What's a sin? Mhm.
3:00
A sin is a is a bow and arrow term. Right?
3:03
You pull your bow back and you fire the arrow.
3:04
If you don't hit the target, that's a sin.
3:06
Well, if you don't know what target you're aiming for, how can you possibly hit it?
3:09
So my dad said, "I don't care if you change your mind 50 times. Just have a goal.
3:15
Tell me what you want to do and then we'll keep talking about it. You're only 7. You can change it.
3:18
But you got to have that in your mind right now."
3:19
So I said, "I love going to the hospital with you. I'll be a doctor." I never changed my mind.
3:27
And I I'm blessed because there's not a lot of things I could have done.
3:29
And the field that I've selected, heart surgery, is perfectly designed for my personality. I mean, ideal.
3:34
I couldn't be a hematologist or pathologist.
3:36
I need to be in there in the battle.
3:38
I need to have immediate feedback and gratification.
3:41
If my operation doesn't go well, I can tell right then cuz the beep beep becomes beep.
3:47
It All these changes begin to happen.
3:50
You've spoken about heartbeat and EKGs in your work.
3:51
So, you know, the metaphor will will come back later in this podcast.
3:56
But, for me as a as a heart surgeon, I recognized early on that there were aspects of of what I was good at that would make me excel at heart surgery, and there are things that I was bad at that would hurt me and hold me back in other fields.
4:08
And so, although I told my dad I'll be a doctor at 7, the nuances of it evolved over my life.
4:12
But, it allowed me to begin to head in a direction.
4:17
And that's an important message for a lot of your listeners.
4:19
You've done such a great job getting people to to think bigger, but also think by stepping back from their perception of what life is and what they're destined to be become.
4:30
And if you can have a bigger vision for yourself, uh then you'll be able to head in that direction.
4:35
And then one of the biggest messages I always have by own kids and folks I try to mentor is you don't want me to have a bigger vision for you than you. Yes.
4:43
If my thoughts about how big you can be are greater than your thoughts for what you can be, yeah, that's not a good match. Right.
4:48
Yeah, you're you're under-serving yourself. Absolutely.
4:50
Listening to you now, you have such a high level of self-awareness.
4:53
Like when you're speaking about why being a doctor was right for you, it's so clear and it's so specific to you.
5:03
I've heard many people tell me why they want to be doctors and often you will see patterns or you'll hear broad answers.
5:08
Whereas when I hear from you, there's so much specificity.
5:09
Tell me about when was that time after you said it, you know, at 7 years old at that early age, when was that time when you started to get the awareness to start noticing what was needed to become a doctor specifically in that field and then that you had those skills.
5:24
What was it that revealed that to you?
5:27
It was until I was in college.
5:27
I I I go I gone to a great school.
5:30
I had learned a lot of the fundamentals that I needed to have to succeed in life.
5:34
And I went to college and I was playing football. Mhm.
5:39
And I was beginning to understand what excelling at at at at any adventure would require.
5:44
And I began to study my own body and realized there were subtleties about my body that I'd never t- appreciated. I had taken for granted.
5:50
By the way, most of you listening out there probably is is just where I was and you know, I'm not perfect either, but I've you know, began get a little more proficient.
5:59
And so, as I began to appreciate the spectacular wonders of the human body, and the fact I could get my body to do certain things I didn't otherwise expect, I began to appreciate that I could actually do this as a career.
6:09
I like telling people things about their body.
6:12
It gave me joy to look in someone's eyes, have them know that I was there for them, and I could give them insight that could change their basic assumption of the world around.
6:21
I'll give you one example right now. Please.
6:22
But and just stay away from illness, right?
6:24
Cuz I could try to diagnose blood pressure, but so you know, it's hard to get the stethoscope this far. Sure.
6:28
Everyone put their hands out in front of them if you're not driving, and look at your third digit and your fourth digit, your ring finger versus the middle finger, right?
6:34
And then look at the index finger.
6:36
You got those three fingers there, right?
6:37
Okay, which is longer, the index finger the or the ring finger? The ring finger for me. All right.
6:43
So, people who have a ring finger longer than the index finger had testosterone exposure in utero.
6:49
They're usually men, but not always.
6:52
Women will usually have a index finger, the pointer, longer than the ring finger, because they weren't exposed to testosterone when they were in utero. Yes.
7:01
Yeah, this is true, right?
7:02
Now, here's something that's been true your entire life, right?
7:04
It's so obvious in retrospect, you would think you would have already known it, but you didn't.
7:09
There are literally hundreds of examples like that that if you appreciate them, they will be able to help you as guide posts as you get through life.
7:17
That's just a parlor trick I just gave you.
7:18
But there's some pretty profound ideas, like are you a supertaster or not?
7:21
That's genetically determined by how well you taste certain foods.
7:26
People who are supertasters are very sensitive to bitter tastes like broccoli and leafy greens.
7:33
They don't like vegetables.
7:33
So, it's not cuz you're a bad person you don't like vegetables, literally your taste buds don't want you to like those vegetables.
7:40
And kids have more taste buds when they're young and more of these taste buds, so they don't like vegetables.
7:44
And there's a survival benefit of that because in the wilds of 10,000 years ago, if you're wandering around eating bitter things, well, poisonous things are bitter. Mhm.
7:55
So, you don't want to eat bitter things.
7:57
So, you naturally gravitate to sweet things. Right.
8:00
Which is why kids are taught that.
8:00
And they naturally want it anyway, so it works.
8:02
But if you don't mature your taste buds, if you infantilize them with fast food and junk food, then they never grow up to become real taste buds.
8:10
They're no longer going to help you choose the foods naturally that you would want.
8:13
In the Indian subculture, you're you know, it's you're exposed to turmeric so early in life, it becomes part of your your natural desire to enjoy food.
8:21
You put it on making curry food, right?
8:23
Turns out that turmeric has a remarkable and powerful effect at reducing amyloid plaque in the brain, which might explain why there's less Alzheimer's in India than we would expect.
8:32
Now, all these things are ways long ways of me telling you that it's not just luck that you are the way you are. Mhm.
8:40
And because you can understand the way you are better than you thought you could, you can hack it to make it easier to do the right thing. Mhm.
8:46
And how do you start that transformation then?
8:48
So, now that you're aware that actually my taste buds are naturally putting me towards these sweet foods, but they may not end up in the best place for me, how do we start molding and transforming our taste buds, for example?
9:01
Create an environment that feeds what you're good at and protects you from what you're not good at. Automate your life. I love chocolate.
9:07
I mean, I really love chocolate.
9:10
I'm glad you brought that up.
9:10
I was going to say I have a massive sweet tooth for chocolate.
9:13
Yeah, it's just it's just something about it.
9:13
I don't I don't like cupcakes, but I like chocolate, real chocolate, not you know, cocoa, the 70% dark chocolate.
9:19
And then you put that on nuts. I'm a Turk. It's all eater nuts.
9:20
I just use I mean, 90% of the hazelnuts in the world are made in Turkey. Yes.
9:26
So, you just can't get away from this stuff. Yeah.
9:28
And if I know if I put chocolate-covered nuts around me, I will finish the whole bowl.
9:32
I just don't have the ability to stop.
9:33
So, I just make sure I'm never around chocolate-covered nuts in bowls.
9:38
I'll eat one or two at a time. I don't deprive myself.
9:40
I eat the chocolate by itself and nuts by themselves, but not together, ever.
9:42
That's a simple example, but there are many others that you could just think about in your own life.
9:47
There are a lot of folks who very appropriately medicate with food. Mhm.
9:52
Because turns out carbohydrates, simple carbs especially, are incredibly soothing to the brain.
9:55
They hit that brain like crack cocaine.
9:58
So, if you are prone to that addictive response, you have to be careful about that.
10:02
So, if you get home from work and you've had a fight with your boss or with your spouse or the kids weren't respectful and the traffic was bad and you walk in there and you're a little down, and the first thing you see when you open the fridge is a cheesecake. Mhm.
10:14
You're going to grab that cheesecake cuz you're disciplined and cut a very thin sliver of it.
10:17
I mean, so thin you can see through it.
10:19
It's a micron thick, right?
10:21
It's like, you know, microfiche fish.
10:23
And you cut that little thing and you put it in your mouth. It tastes so good.
10:26
And then you realize you didn't cut the cake straight.
10:31
So, to straighten it out, you take another sliver, another bigger sliver, and then it's wedge.
10:34
And by the time you're done, you've finished the whole thing off.
10:35
All right, pass that whole thing over here, Mama, and you're done.
10:39
And what you've done unconsciously is feeding to your weakness.
10:41
But if there's no stuff that you're prone to eat in your fridge, you'll eat what you get.
10:47
That's why I always tell folks, the crisper is actually a disservice to you.
10:50
You hide the veggies in the crisper, you don't see them. Mhm.
10:53
Instead, you see the soft drink and leftovers and other stuff at eye level.
10:56
At eye level in your fridge, put foods that you know are good for you that you also like. That's so true. message.
11:02
Only eat foods that you adore that happen to be good for you.
11:04
Cuz you're not going to eat that stuff anyway. Absolutely.
11:08
you'll slowly start to get into a habit.
11:10
If if you're going to drink alcohol and you know you're going to drink alcohol when you get home, the best alcohol probably is tequila cuz it's got a little sweetness to it from the agave anyway.
11:17
So, you don't have to add anything to it.
11:18
You can drink it straight up, put some lemon in it.
11:20
So, a serving is 66 calories in a 1 oz, right?
11:25
So, if I if I So, and I like and I if I'm going to ever have a drink, that's what I generally will have.
11:29
So, I I it in my freezer at eye level.
11:29
I open the freezer, I don't see ice cream cuz I also like right I'll see the agave and I'll drink that and then I'll have a little bit and then I'm done.
11:37
And so I haven't undermined myself with something that I know will cause a problem for me in the future.
11:42
Now if you're listening, you have your own limitations, your own strengths.
11:46
Feed the limit the strengths and hinder the limitations, starve them.
11:50
I love how practical that is, especially eye level because we all know at grocery stores and superstores the stuff at eye level is the stuff that we all want to buy and isn't necessarily bad for us but we can change what's at eye level in our homes.
12:02
paying for to get that Yes, exactly. Exactly.
12:05
is a good business, I don't blame them. Oh, 100%.
12:07
Now that you know, address it appropriately. Yeah, absolutely.
12:09
That's such great advice.
12:10
I know I know that for a fact that it's it's it's why mini bars in hotels are so dangerous because yeah Mini bars are another I usually take my own food with me. Yes, me too.
12:21
Yeah, and I travel I travel with a bag of bag of nuts in my briefcase right now. Yeah.
12:25
I never leave home without it. Yeah.
12:27
I think everyone ought to have nuts in their pockets or men men and women by the way. I soak my nuts.
12:30
I like to put them in a little water, they germinate. Mhm.
12:34
And I cart them around and that way I'm not forging through vending machines looking for food.
12:37
Again, simple little hacks like that end up making your life a little simpler because I mean they make your life simple but it's more straightforward because what you really want to do is focus your effort, your true chi Mhm.
12:48
the energy decisions that you have to use and consume have to be focused on things that matter. Mhm.
12:54
So I don't want to rediscover what breakfast I want every day.
12:55
I'm going to have Greek yogurt and blueberries most days or a little oatmeal or whatever.
12:59
I mean there's other things there but there are two or three options, eggs, you know, that's it.
13:05
I'm not going to go out there wasting all my time in the morning trying to find out what to eat for breakfast.
13:10
You know, I think the smart thing to do is to save your energy making prowess Absolutely.
13:14
for the ideas that you absolutely have to do that are in your best interest but also only you can do. Absolutely.
13:20
And that way by the time you get to the middle of the afternoon, you haven't exhausted all that energy making worthless decisions and then you don't fall prey to the afternoon dilemma that many have. The bewitching hour. Yes.
13:33
Because by the time it's 4:00, 5:00 in the afternoon, you're so exhausted your brain is, that you have to supercharge it with carbs. Yes.
13:39
That's why people crave foods that aren't good for them at 4:00, 5:00 in the afternoon.
13:43
Mhm, that's such a good point.
13:43
And we all know that decision fatigue is so real when we're wasting our energy on making these smaller insignificant decisions.
13:51
I've been having the same thing for breakfast and same thing for lunch for the last 10, 15 years of my life. So proud of you, Jay.
13:58
And it's made the it's made my life so much easier.
13:59
No, it's one of those things that you do because it just gives you sanity and space to use your creative energy.
14:04
I eat oatmeal every single morning. Yeah.
14:07
And I usually have avocado on toast for lunch.
14:09
That's that's usually my ideal lunch.
14:11
That's why you look the way you look.
14:12
And then you can, you know, fool around for for dinner and whatever you want.
14:15
Yeah, I'm a bit more experimental at dinner. Usually it's Indian.
14:16
And I'm very fortunate that my wife's an incredible cook, so I get spoiled every night with something something good for me. But no, I love that.
14:23
And I I think so many of us put so much pressure on ourselves to have to be creative about our meals every single day.
14:28
And I'm sure what's that doing?
14:30
Is it also confusing our system?
14:32
Like if you're always taking different things.
14:34
I've always had that intuitive sense that I'm actually confusing my own body because I'm just giving it something new every day or every morning.
14:41
I think you do confuse your body at times, but even more importantly, your body knows what works for it and what doesn't.
14:45
And it tells you that in subtle ways and then more loudly says it and then shouts in your ear as you get ill from that. Pay attention.
14:52
So most of us will naturally gravitate towards the kinds of foods that are in our best interest.
14:57
So if you eat oatmeal every morning, there's a pretty good chance that you don't have a problem with oatmeal because you wouldn't do it anymore.
15:02
Now, there's some folks listening who haven't paid attention.
15:05
So you're exempted from this comment. Okay. So please pay attention.
15:08
But if you if you get up in the morning and you're bloated, your eyes are swollen shut, you feel like you've got a cough, you know, you're having a food allergy often times or an allergy to something. So listen to your body.
15:17
But assuming you get up, you feel rested and and you you you energized, then you know, what you did the day before works for you.
15:22
You'll naturally want to reproduce that. Mhm.
15:26
And I know that I have sensitive intestinal systems around certain things.
15:28
I can't eat super spicy food. Me, too.
15:31
Yeah, my and my wife loves it. She's also a chef.
15:32
That was one of our, you know, she that was one of the New York Times best-selling books was her book on Oh, I forgot that one. Wow.
15:38
The uh but the uh and she'll she likes spicy foods.
15:39
And I see her mouth burning up.
15:42
And I know when I eat really spicy food, my bottom hurts when I go to the bathroom.
15:45
I mean, the entire intestinal system is ravaged.
15:47
So, I've learned not to do that.
15:49
It's always eats it out on the first time or anytime it happens.
15:52
Yeah, listen to our bodies.
15:52
Everyone who's listening and watching right now, there are so many incredible insights in this podcast already.
15:57
I hope you're taking notes.
15:58
And if you're driving and you can't take notes, and if you're walking your dog and you can't take notes, then please please please make sure you come back to this episode.
16:05
There are so many great nuggets that Dr.
16:07
Oz is already sharing with us.
16:07
Thank you so much for making it so practical and applicable for my audience.
16:10
You you made a point uh a few moments ago where you were talking about how when you're talking about people with their visions and their goals, you're always wanting them to expand them further.
16:22
You were saying that if I'm speaking to someone and my goal for them is bigger than theirs, then they need to work on that. How have you seen that?
16:28
Like, obviously, you spent a lot of time between Turkey and the US when you were growing up.
16:32
How were you able to expand your vision?
16:34
And how can people who are listening today also do that?
16:36
Because I don't know about yourself, and I'd love to know, when I started, I never knew how big things could scale.
16:46
And I'm not sure when you started as a doctor whether you believed you'd have this incredible TV show and selling over 40 million books.
16:51
Like, did you have that vision or was that something that gradually grew as time went on?
16:57
The none of the things you said were on my vision board ever. Exactly. That's yeah.
17:01
And I didn't do any things that I did for that vision. Yes.
17:04
I had much more measured desires, but they were desires that would address the deep s- urging, longing inside me that I I felt that while I was on this planet having this experience, if I hadn't done these things, shame on me. Mhm.
17:17
So, I began pursuing a lot of things I do with that measured goal.
17:19
And my wife who's actually had a much better pulse on what I should be doing and on what America's feeling and needs than I've ever had, was the one who kept nudging me.
17:30
And she was the one who conspired with Oprah, actually.
17:32
Cuz they said help my wife had So, I'm practicing heart surgery, minding my own business. You're in New York City.
17:38
I'm at New York Presbyterian.
17:39
So, sometimes the news agencies will call and say, "Hey, breaking story.
17:42
Someone's having heart surgery.
17:44
What do you have to comment?"
17:45
Or maybe you did the heart surgery cuz I did a I had done an operation on a bunch of famous people.
17:48
So, I ended up becoming part of the news, but it was, you know, around the edges.
17:51
That wasn't I didn't do the heart surgery to to be in the paper.
17:56
So, then my wife one day said, "You know what?
17:58
You're coming home every day and you're moaning about the fact that that people are having heart surgery who didn't need it.
18:04
If they'd just taken a few proactive steps on their own, they could have avoided the whole thing.
18:10
Instead of complaining about it, let's fix the problem.
18:11
Let's make a show that teaches people what you guys know."
18:14
And this is the accusation she launched at me and she was right.
18:18
She says, "The reason America doesn't have the message about health is because you haven't given it to them."
18:24
So, with that in mind, and I started with working with her.
18:26
We crafted a show that was that aired on Discovery Channel.
18:29
My first guest was Oprah.
18:31
And these and Oprah bonded and they began talking about things that we could do in a bigger way.
18:34
And of course Oprah had the biggest platform of all.
18:36
So, and she loves to teach.
18:37
People don't always give her the credit she deserves, but that's primarily what she wanted to do.
18:43
Whether it's race relations or transgender issues, uh GLBT issues, or if it's uh spirituality or health.
18:47
In fact, the word doctor means doctor, right? Teacher.
18:52
The word itself means teacher.
18:54
So, I would go on her show, you know, 60, 70 times.
18:57
She We worked stuff together and these and Oprah began planning out ways we could do it differently and brand it better and and get America to believe they could do it.
19:05
That Cuz our biggest enemy your biggest enemy, Jay, is nihilism.
19:10
People don't think they can do it.
19:13
And we're both here to say, "Yes, you can." Yes. Absolutely.
19:16
Only you are holding yourself back.
19:19
And what you want to achieve, that's your decision.
19:20
But what you But you can do it.
19:21
So, I began talking more and more publicly about the possibilities of health, and that led me into a place where I could, you know, talk to folks in the public areas.
19:32
In fact, I started on radio with because I would hope host Oprah's radio show.
19:35
When I do her show, and then I go off into the radio studio and do that.
19:39
And that actually taught me a lot about how to talk to people about stuff that matters.
19:42
And I recognized at that point, and actually, I remember the moment that it happened.
19:46
I was with Oprah, and she said, "Has it happened yet?" And I said, "What?"
19:51
She said, "You know, do people know?" And I said, "Know what?"
19:53
She said, "Do they see you on the street and know who you are and know what you're doing?" And it had just started.
19:59
Cuz most of us are comfortable with anonymity, right?
20:02
You're walking down the street, no one knows what you're doing.
20:03
Uh thankfully, we behave ourselves, but, you know, you don't have to. Yes, yes.
20:08
But at a certain point, people begin knowing who you are.
20:10
They think they want to go with you.
20:11
They can't quite place you.
20:13
And And eventually, it becomes a bit more powerful of a link to what you do for a living.
20:16
And she said, "When you have that, use it for good."
20:22
It's not about self-aggrandizement.
20:22
It's really about using that power of the platform, the the bully pulpit, the the microphone that you have, and telling a story, uh I'm sharing wisdom, which is what you're doing, that allows people to to find themselves in their own life story.
20:36
Cuz listen, we all are in a story. Yes.
20:39
And if you don't know what story you're in, that's a problem.
20:40
You don't want to be in someone else's story, cuz if you're in someone else's story, you're a bit player in their cuz they're not going to make you the star of their story, right?
20:48
So, don't be your spouse's story person.
20:50
You're just a co-star there, right?
20:52
And if you're not sure what your story is about, well, you might be headed in the wrong direction.
20:57
So, figure out what your story is, small or big as it is, and then show up in that story, cuz you're the star of it, cuz only you can be the star of it.
21:02
And that was part of the message we started to go out with on the show.
21:06
And I tell you what resonated the most was people's interest in their health.
21:14
I mean it's selfish in a way because you want to be healthy and it's for you in your best interest.
21:17
But at its very core, if you can't take charge of your own health, if you can't if you cannot control what's going on inside your body, how can you change the world outside of it? Absolutely.
21:29
And the reason you should care about your body is is because it's the first step of everything else that you have to do.
21:35
If you're struggling with diabetes and high blood pressure and your cholesterol's wacky and you're depressed cuz you've got continuous inflammatory problems, you can't remember anything cuz you're heading towards dementia because everything else in your body is in is in disarray, well, how are you going to contribute to the planet? Mhm. Right?
21:49
Your parents don't give you the body you were blessed to have, your most vital inheritance, so you can muck it up. Yeah.
21:54
So, now that you realize how sacred you are, if you truly appreciate that, take the manage as you can do all the other things.
22:00
And the challenge I always give to my audience is think about someone you really adore and really love.
22:06
Just absolutely are spectacularly faithful about.
22:08
If they were putting in their body what you're putting in your body, what would you tell them?
22:11
Cuz whatever that is, tell that to yourself. That is great advice. I love that. Tell that to yourself.
22:17
When you Yeah, when we treat people we love or are fond of or affectionate towards with so much more care and attention than we do ourselves.
22:26
And you reminded me of This was one of Arnold Schwarzenegger's first ever documentaries.
22:31
It was called Pumping Iron. I've seen it.
22:33
I know the guy who I know the guy who produced it, Butler. Oh, no way. Okay.
22:36
I've I've only ever seen it when I was growing up, but I remember there's one line in there that stuck with me.
22:41
And in that he said, "The reason why fitness goals were so important to him and his health and his physique was so important to him is because he believed that was something you could never cheat." Right?
22:51
You could never cheat your own body.
22:53
If you're eating badly, you're going to see the result. You can't cheat it.
22:57
Like you can cheat you can lie to yourself in your mind, but your body's not going to lie to you.
23:01
insight from a very big man. Absolutely, absolutely.
23:02
And and he said it in I think it was like 1970 or something.
23:06
It must have even way before I was born, but I remember remember watching that, but it was it was fascinating.
23:11
I Tell me about this belief principle.
23:13
I'd love to hear from your perspective because we hear about it so much, but I'd love to hear it from your medical background and and this is us diving into purpose a bit more now as well.
23:22
But where have you had a failed belief that you've had to rewire and then seen the benefits of having new belief systems in your own life?
23:30
Where have you seen that in a big way?
23:32
A failed belief that you had to transform or upgrade?
23:37
A good example, I think, in my life has been my interaction with patients.
23:41
So I've got a couple strikes. I'm a I'm a doctor.
23:45
So I'm you know sometimes you know I think I know everything.
23:47
I'm a surgeon, which is basically controlled arrogance. Correct?
23:51
Cuz you don't want to have a tepid surgeon in there dillydallying around.
23:54
You got to take a knife and cut somebody.
23:55
That So you have to have unbelievable confidence that's the right thing to do.
24:00
Uh and I'm a guy, which is a third strike. Okay?
24:02
Cuz so cuz you know we mansplain for a reason. Right?
24:04
Cuz we think we got it all worked out.
24:06
Don't ask directions, all that stuff.
24:08
So you send a male doctor surgeon into a room to talk to a patient, we're going to tell you the answer and then expect that you got it then move on cuz I know you got you heard me tell you the answer.
24:18
You'll you'll act accordingly. Yes. Yes. And that doesn't happen.
24:20
Doesn't happen in the hospital, doesn't happen in real life, doesn't happen in schools, in relationships, or anything else we that we really care about.
24:26
People do not change based on what they know.
24:29
They change based on what they feel. Mhm, so true.
24:34
And you can't fix a feeling until you hear it. Mhm.
24:38
So the failed belief on my part was I could cut corners, be fast about it, tell my kids the answer, bark something to my wife, tell the patient what to do. Stop smoking. Well, I mean please.
24:48
I mean if it was that easy they would have done it.
24:50
They know it's not good for them.
24:51
They don't need to tell them it's bad for them.
24:54
Quite the opposite, they feel guilty when you remind them that they're incompetent and couldn't stop smoking.
24:59
And then to deal with their self their failing and the self-flagellation, they go out and smoke to relax.
25:05
So, if you're really going to get people to change, and this gets back into the fundamental psychology of change, which is it's not the psychology of Freud, which is about how messed up you are cuz of your parents.
25:14
It's not about the beautiful, wonderful work that's been done in the mid part of the last century that helped establish the fundamentals of of why we think the way we think and why archetypes are so important to us and why faith is ultimately so essential to our well-being.
25:29
Faith in anything, ourselves, something bigger than us and all the things that go along with that.
25:35
But but the psychology of change is about the very seemingly pedestrian issue of how you get people to do something different than they were going to do.
25:40
But it drives all politics, it drives a lot of decisions that are being made today, all marketing is based on this.
25:45
But it is also the main reason we have conflict in our relationships because men marry the woman exactly they want, just the way they want her.
25:54
And then she wants to change.
25:57
And women marry the man they think he can become, and he won't change. Right? Yes.
26:02
And I And then women are From the moment you're married, you're moving apart from each other. Yeah.
26:07
And you've got to find ways of reconnecting after the chemical handcuffs come off, which is about 7 years.
26:12
That's about enough time to bear a couple of children and get them to an age where they can actually chip in a little bit not run off the cliff, right?
26:19
But at 7 years, the chemical handcuffs fall off, the oxytocin, dopamine, serotonin, they go away, and now you actually are left with who you really are.
26:25
And you can't figure it out because you don't understand the emotions drive it. Mhm.
26:30
It's It seems self-evident, but think about how you communicate with each other. Yeah.
26:35
So, if I'm going to tell someone to stop smoking, I don't tell them they're stupid for smoking.
26:39
I tell them, do you Do you Do you care for yourself as much as the people in this room who brought you here care for you?
26:43
And if you really loved yourself, you would stop.
26:47
But even more importantly, if you love the people who are around you, you'll stop so you'll be there for them.
26:52
Who's going to walk daughter down the aisle?
26:53
Who's going to keep your wife company when she gets frail because she's going to need you.
26:56
So if now with that mindset, here a couple tactics that might work.
26:59
We'll still give you the tools. Yeah, sure.
27:02
But you'll use them now with a bit of passion.
27:03
And that is the fundamental way we get people to adjust their lives.
27:06
And when we try to we ignore that, that's why politics is so fascinating because people emotionally already know the answer, their answer.
27:17
May not be your answer but it's their answer.
27:18
Then the facts are just there to defend it.
27:20
That's why people have the exact same set of facts and have opposite answers because they can manipulate facts.
27:23
It's a classic line, there's statisticians, damn statisticians, and liars. Yeah. Right?
27:29
Actually I said it wrong. Sorry, I got it wrong.
27:31
It's liars uh I I completely muck it. That's fine. Say it again. Yeah.
27:36
It's liars damn We'll re-edit it. Yeah, yeah.
27:37
I don't have to edit it given if if if I we all make mistakes.
27:40
It's liars, damn liars, and statisticians. Right. Right.
27:43
And uh because the statisticians are ultimately, not that they want to do it, but they can manipulate anything to say anything. Mhm.
27:49
And if you don't deal with the underlying emotions of why you feel a certain way about abortion or gun control or uh inequality or immigration, then you're not the facts are who cares. Mhm.
28:00
They're You can change minds with facts sometimes, but it's uncommon. Absolutely.
28:04
How have you seen purpose linked to health choices in people's lives?
28:11
It's the best best way for you to identify uh that part of your purpose is to better the planet, to bring light to us.
28:19
This is a rabbinical concept and in Judaism it speak to this that you you know that your goal is to bring light.
28:25
And you have to challenge yourself, are you bringing light to the world or not?
28:28
And we can get petty, all of us can.
28:28
Uh we can make mistakes, but if what you're fundamentally trying to do is to is to to lift the burden, then you're doing good.
28:36
And one of the best ways you can do that is through your own body cuz you're either bearing an albatross around the neck of the people who love you or you're leading the path forward.
28:45
And the big insight that people don't want to acknowledge but I'll share with you right now is people who hang with healthy people get healthy.
28:50
People who hang with unhealthy people get sick.
28:54
That's why when people when couples marry the wife will generally lose some health because she takes better care of herself in general than he does and his bad habits will rub off on her. We want to flip that. Move it the other way.
29:07
Because once you figure out those basic simple steps which are much more tangible and visible, we can all get up and walk half an hour in the morning and if you didn't walk, you didn't do it.
29:15
Then from there your meditation.
29:17
Well, how good your meditation?
29:18
Well, you know, you could beat yourself about it.
29:20
Trying of course is the most important thing but walking the 10,000 steps is easier to measure, quantify and check the box on than did you get to a place in meditation that you were aiming for and then did that translate to living a life of awareness and fulfillment?
29:33
Well, that's you know, that's hard. Right?
29:34
People spend their whole lives and don't get there which you know, maybe you're never supposed to get there then and on and on and on until you finally get to a place where and I've seen this especially in older patients where you did what you wanted to do.
29:48
There's a serenity, a peacefulness.
29:51
And I see that especially in people who say I've I've I've done enough.
29:57
I don't need to have my life saved anymore. Dr.
30:01
Oz, I know you can operate on my heart and make my valve better but it's not about that.
30:06
People that I loved, I loved. Many are gone.
30:08
The things I needed to do, I got past.
30:09
I'm ready for the next chapter and I pray that I one day be able to get there.
30:14
For most of us thinking through this podcast right now, we're not there but we better take the steps so that we'll one day be that.
30:23
Otherwise, what's it about? Absolutely. Yeah, I love that. Okay, so Dr.
30:27
Oz, honestly, I could talk to you for hours. Like you're fascinating.
30:28
Like this is we've we've got to we've only got the final five left now which is our quick fire rapid fire round that we end every episode with but genuinely I hope we can do this again.
30:38
I look forward I'm going to have you on of Yeah, absolutely and I'd love to develop this friendship, too, because yeah, you're fascinating to talk to.
30:43
I could literally sit and listen to you for hours.
30:46
So, these are the final five.
30:46
The first question I want to ask you is your father actually set you up with your wife.
30:51
Tell us a bit about that.
30:53
Uh the best thing I ever did was marrying my wife. Okay.
30:56
And I remember meeting her at a restaurant because my father had a meeting her father for dinner.
30:59
They're both heart doctors, you know, surgeons.
31:04
And she she she walked in the restaurant, I was in love with her immediately.
31:07
She thought I was the maître d'.
31:10
And I didn't want my father to have any satisfaction thinking he may have introduced me to my wife.
31:13
This is a, you know, classic the this this this core you should have, I think, if you're in a healthy father-son relationship.
31:19
Uh and so I dated her secretly for a while until one day he was giving me a a hard time and saying, you know, you're you're always working, you're not focusing on things that really matter.
31:28
I introduced you to that wonderful woman, you didn't even talk to her.
31:33
And I finally acknowledged him that not only was I talking to her that I was but I we were dating and I was going to marry her. And I did within a year. I love that. Great.
31:40
Question number two, you've been married for over 30 years now. 34 years.
31:44
34 years, which is incredible.
31:44
Tell us one of the biggest lessons that has helped you create such a long-term relationship, also successful.
31:50
It seems like you're so happy with it.
31:53
father-in-law, this is my father-in-law, told me that I should give it on the small things because when the big decisions had to be made, I'd be giving it on them as well, so I should know know what it feels like.
32:02
But the bigger the bigger message I I didn't respect the yin-yang of marriage. Mhm.
32:09
I didn't need Lisa to be good at what I was good at. Mhm.
32:12
I needed her to be good at what I was bad at. Yes.
32:15
Lisa is very thoughtful about deeper spiritual issues. Wonderful.
32:19
She went to theology school at Columbia.
32:21
She, you know, if you look at her bedside, it's deep the deepest of the deep. Wow.
32:25
And that's pleasure reading.
32:28
I mean, she's devouring Young just as a, you know, afternoon on a Sunday just to remind herself about some of the basic premises.
32:34
And I And I'm trying to catch up on playing football with my son or I'm very tactical. Yes.
32:39
And I needed her to tell me what to aim at back to our initial comment about sin.
32:43
And until I really respected, that's what I needed to fill the to color in the lines of who I am. Mhm.
32:50
And it also puts on responsibility to me to color in her lines. Absolutely.
32:54
And if you do that together, then we're both satisfied.
32:56
And so I see and because of that, I now actively seek out people who are different from me. Mhm.
33:02
Because I don't need to get better at at what and with people who are good at what I'm doing.
33:05
I need to get better at things I'm really bad at. Absolutely. Love that.
33:07
Question number three, what is the most used app on your phone? Most used app?
33:12
I mean It's the the messaging apps. Yeah.
33:17
Because I'm always talking to folks and I find it incredibly valuable to ping people that I miss. Yeah.
33:24
And I I don't ping them just as a hey, you know, you owe me something.
33:26
I ping them to remind them that there's stuff that's important that that we got to focus on in life.
33:30
My kids see I'm too clingy. Yeah.
33:33
But but but I but I but I feel an obligation. I love that.
33:37
Number four, walk us through your morning routine.
33:41
I get up every morning around 6:00.
33:41
Uh I'll do yoga for about 7 minutes.
33:43
I say 7 minutes on purpose because I know I know I always have 7 minutes.
33:47
I'm not going to admit to myself I'm so disorganized I don't have 7 minutes.
33:49
You won't either, Jay or anyone or anyone listening.
33:53
Um so it's 7 minutes we can always start and by the time you start you're almost done.
33:56
I do a sun salutation with some calisthenics, push-ups, sit-ups.
33:58
If I have more time, I work out for an hour.
34:00
I'll go down to the gym and you know, we have a gym in our where we have and I'll manage it.
34:03
If not, then I'll uh get off to work.
34:07
Then I don't eat any breakfast, don't have any coffee.
34:09
I have a little lemon juice and water.
34:10
It's a old diuretic treatment by the way.
34:12
Get your gastric flu so your juices flowing.
34:16
Uh around 8:00, 8:30, it's a couple hours later I'll feel a little hungry.
34:19
I'll have yogurt and blueberries.
34:20
I don't have any coffee or any caffeine until later in the day.
34:24
And I'll challenge everyone who can hear my voice to do the same.
34:26
You don't need caffeine when you first wake up.
34:29
The The just woke you up.
34:29
The toothpaste must have could have helped in the shower for sure will get you up. Yes.
34:34
That's just a cultural issue and if you can't go for for more without for 2 hours without coffee, you're addicted.
34:41
So, audit that in yourself.
34:41
Around 9:10 in the morning, have a cup of coffee.
34:45
I'm not against caffeine, but recognize that it's not actually giving you energy.
34:47
It's withdrawing your energy from your energy banks.
34:49
So, you make it a cultural issue.
34:51
Make it a pleasurable item. Yes.
34:53
And not make it something you have to have first thing in the morning.
34:54
And then from then on I'm automated.
34:55
You know, I make the shows. I nap every day.
34:58
It's only when I do the Oh, wow.
35:01
Let me just share that with your audience.
35:01
It is the most valuable thing I've I've I've done in my life.
35:03
I used to nap even at the hospital when I had a chance.
35:06
But you can go Leonardo da Vinci never slept through an evening, but he would nap every day a couple times.
35:10
So, a nap is much more effective than caffeine or carbohydrates or any of the other things you may try in the afternoon.
35:17
8 hours after you awaken, so for us it's about 2:00 in the afternoon, take a 5-10 minute nap, it'll change your life. Wow, I love that.
35:24
And fifth and final question, if you could set the world an experiment they had to do for 30 days, just one thing that they had to do for 30 days in a row, what would it be? Sleep better.
35:34
And it's much harder than you think. Work at it.
35:36
It's worth the investment.
35:38
Your creativity will be dramatically increased.
35:40
And here's the best part.
35:44
You'll work hard cuz you probably do anyway. You'll work smart.
35:45
And everything will turn out better cuz you'll be able to connect the dots more impactfully than anybody else.
35:49
And sleep is something you do by yourself. Only you can do it.
35:53
But don't shortchange yourself. Yeah, I love that. Thank you so much, Dr. Oz. That was awesome.
35:57
I'm sure you all agree that we could listen to him more and more of that.
36:00
So, we're hoping that Dr.
36:02
Oz will come back onto the podcast.
36:04
Thank you so much for listening.
36:05
There were so many great insights today.
36:07
Make sure you grab them, share them on Instagram, Facebook, YouTube, Twitter, wherever you like.
36:10
You know that I'm always sharing the ones that stand out to me.
36:13
Like I said, go back through this episode and just pick one thing that you can start applying from tomorrow.
36:19
Just one thing, whether it's changing the height of something in your refrigerator, whether it's trying to get better sleep, whatever Dr.
36:24
Oz may have said that resonated with you, just pick one thing, test it for the next week.
36:30
I can't wait for you to listen to the next episode. Dr.
36:31
Oz, thank you so much again. So grateful to you. Really appreciate it. Thank you.
36:36
If you want even more videos just like this one, make sure you subscribe and click on the boxes over here.
36:40
I'm also excited to let you know that you can now get my book Think Like a Monk from thinklikeamonkbook. com.
36:50
Check below in the description to make sure you order today.