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So this next one is Tabasco.
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Do you know what what these are best for? What?
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Little ones for holding toothpicks. Why is that? do that? Holding toothpicks? ones.
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You have the small bottle, yeah. the Tabasco?
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Yeah, you empty it out and then you put toothpicks in.
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And then it one toothpick comes out each time. Wow, there you go. did that? No. No.
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In fact, you know how they doubled their sales?
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They made the hole slightly larger.
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Aren't we all frustrated with Tabasco?
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You got to like force the thing out? Okay.
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Now that we're all trained with the small hole, you double the size of the hole.
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I don't know whatever they did, they made it larger.
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I don't know if it was a factor of two, they made it larger.
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Now you're doing the same thing, twice the product comes out.
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And you're not even thinking twice the product.
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And now you go through it twice as fast, they get twice your money. I'm upset. Yeah, yeah.
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We don't spend enough time lamenting inadequacies of our own language.
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We just stuck with it and we use it and that is that's it.
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And often the language shapes how you think.
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I mean, linguists have known this forever.
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So I'm still angry that we don't have a good word for highly spicy flavors other than calling it hot.
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When the word hot, I would rather use for temperature.
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Whereas in Spanish, they distinguish. Caliente?
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Yeah, yeah, that's right. Or picante.
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One is temperature hot, one is spicy hot.
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Plus we're so good at stealing other people's words. Why can't we do that?
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We should have just had that.
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We could have so been there.
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And and none of these would have the word hot on it. Mhm. So I'm just angry.
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So here's a past guest that we've had the show, had on the show, you and Jay Pharoah. Excellent. Excellent.
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Yeah, I just bumped into him on the airplane and I said I got to introduce myself cuz I'm a fan of comedians and they're I think they hold the soul of civilization in the palm of their hand.
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We live in civilization, they observe civilization, and they see the interconnections that we either take for granted or never noticed, and they make us smile at others and especially at ourselves.
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So, I'm a huge fan of everything comedians are and represent.
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I try to tap as much comedic flavor into my public talks.
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You know, I'll go up on the stage and they say, "Do you want a lav?" A lavalier mic?
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I said, "No, I give me a handheld mic." Cuz then it's a prop.
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You can like knock on a door, you can knock on your head, you can change the volume.
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It gives you another dimension of communication.
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So, he knew who I was and I was flattered by that and we so I just took a picture.
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So, my my actual tweet was, uh, "Met NBC SNL's Jay Pharaoh in flight.
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A reminder that comedy can give more lift than aerodynamics itself."
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And then a few years ago, you credited a game-winning field goal by the Cincinnati Bengals over the Seattle Seahawks to being aided, perhaps, by the rotation of the Earth. It's not a perhaps.
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I know the rotation of the Earth shifted the path of the ball a third of an inch to the right.
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And that ball hit the left upright and then careened in through the post.
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So, there's no supposition about being helped by Earth's rotation.
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The question is whether Earth's rotation was enough of a difference to make it go in. That's all.
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The goalpost is round and the ball is round.
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You hit a round thing against a round thing, fractions of an inch make a difference.
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As any baseball player knows, trying to hit a round ball with a wooden bat.
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A fraction of an inch is is the difference between a home run and a pop out.
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Bengals said, "Yeah, God was on our side."
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or whatever and and it made a lot of local news in each of the two towns.
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What it meant was if there's any kind of science that attaches to what is already a pop culture interest, people they want it. 357 Mad Dog, okay.
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Can I tell you what I did? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
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Or should I take a bite and then tell you?
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Maybe tell me first and then take a bite. case. Just in case, yeah. Just in case. So, my sister had a dog.
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Anytime I visit, it was always begging at the table, always.
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You know, this is what dogs do.
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They act like they've never eaten in their life, okay? With sad eyes.
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So, the dog was there and I said, "I'm going to solve this once and for all."
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And I was eating chalupas with jalapeno peppers on them.
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So, I said, "All right, let me give it some of the ground beef."
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Gave dog some of the ground.
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So, I got the dog accustomed to just eating whatever I toss in her direction.
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And then came the jalapeno slice.
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So, the dog And then, oh my gosh, the dog that looked around like this, the tail went between the legs, and darted into the other room, and the dog never begged at my plate again.
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One slice of jalapeno pepper.
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So, Mad Dog, that's how you take care of dogs. I'm just saying.