at this altitude I can run flat out for a half mile before my hands start shaking so now I also you posted a question now it is [Music] I'm a cybernetic organism living tissue over metal endoskeleton this episode is brought to you by LegalZoom which more
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you're looking for you just have to check it out so find the job meant for you at linkedin.com forward slash jobs again that's linkedin.com forward slash jobs my name is jacque a wink i spent 20 years in the military more specifically in the Navy and even more specifically
than that I was in the SEAL Teams for my whole career I started off as an enlisted SEAL eventually I moved up through the ranks and became a seal officer and I deployed around the world and I was lucky enough to deploy to Iraq a couple of times the first time as I
see old platoon commander and then as the commander of the SEAL Team three task unit bruiser during the Battle of Ramadi in 2006 and when I got back from that deployment I took over the advanced training for the West Coast SEAL Teams as my final assignment in the Navy and
after I retired I started a leadership consulting company called national enfant which led me to writing a bunch of books for for adults and then a bunch of books for kids as well and you can get those books whatever books are sold and along the
way with some coaxing from mr. Tim Ferriss and mr. Joe Rogan after being on their podcasts I started my own podcast called jaakko podcast which comes out on Wednesdays every week and I talk about human nature through the lens of war and atrocities and leadership and I would be
sitting down with Tim right now but he's off in the jungle or the desert or the mountains somewhere so I am just going to answer your questions this time by myself so thanks to Tim for having me on again and thanks to you all for listening and here we go the first
question is from an anonymous person how did you meet your wife and other tips on building a family so I met my wife when I was overseas my wife happened to be overseas at the same time and when I saw her I was I was I was kind of taken
aback by my by my wife because she was a stunning looking woman and I walked right up to her and immediately said you know started talking to her and I won't go into the gory details of that whole situation but because I because I asked my wife if I could tell the whole story
and she actually said do not do that so I'm not going to but I met my when I met her I went up talked to her and not only was she stunningly beautiful she was also super nice which was a very nice surprise for me and immediately I told one of my buddies a couple days later
that I was gonna marry that girl if I could and we ended up yes getting married the the tips I have on this I would say well first of all tell you that getting married is probably the most important decision that you're gonna make in your life because you're
gonna end up spending your rest of your life with this other human being which which is a big task and so you really want to make a good decision and and of course there's a dichotomy in this too because if you think you're gonna find the perfect wife you you're not or you
think you're gonna find the perfect husband you're not they don't exist no one's perfect everyone's gonna have their little idiosyncrasies about them that you don't like or that bother you and so what you have to do is you have to find somebody that you know has
idiosyncrasies that don't bother you very much the other thing and I would say I got lucky in this I would love to tell you that I was at was a visionary and knew exactly what I was looking for but I didn't I got lucky and just happened to meet this this woman that
had this quality which I believe is very important and that is that my wife was emotionally stable and emotionally independent and so what I mean by that is my wife wasn't always relying on me emotionally to give her support about things she didn't really this sounds bad
but she really need me you know I didn't need to be there and and trust me when you're in the SEAL Teams you're not there a lot so I I think if you can find someone that's emotionally independent that doesn't rely on you to prop them up
every day I think that's a big benefit and of can someone go too far with that yeah cuz I'm sure you could have someone that's so independent that they don't even want to be around you and that would be a problem so but I think we tend towards people we like the feeling
of someone that's depending on us and and so I think we I think I saw guys get sucked into that over the years so I think you look for someone that's got a little bit of emotional independence that they can stand on their own and then and then when it comes to just
relationship and I don't know you might want to check yourself if you're coming to me for relationship advice but you are so I'll put it out to you the here's the here's the thing when and I have been married for a long time 20 plus years that's a pretty long time to be married
I guess these days well one of the things going back to the idea of extreme ownership is guess what you take ownership of your relationship and you take ownership of the problems inside your relationship if you're blaming your spouse when things
go wrong that's not gonna work out really well and when I try to think of an examples talking about this with someone the other day and want one example that when my kids were younger it's always stressful stressful time in the family is getting ready for school in the
morning you got kids you got teeth to get brushed you got lunches to get made you got the clock is ticking you're gonna be late there's traffic there's all these things going on and so sometimes you can that that stress can start to impact negatively the family so
I was thinking what's the situation where you've got to take ownership well let's say normally you know for me I was getting up and going to work my wife was getting up and getting the kids ready for school cool those are our two jobs in the morning I get ready to go to work she
gets ready to take kids school so let's say the lunches weren't made and the kids got up late my wife got up late and all of a sudden she can't get out the door cuz she's got to make make the sandwiches for the kids and if I look at her and say well you know you didn't
make the sandwiches that's why everyone's late I'm telling you right now that's not gonna work out well you're blaming the person and when you blame people they get defensive and they start blaming other things and they're gonna blame you and they're gonna blame
the kids they're to blame everyone else so that doesn't solve the problem all it does is create arguments so instead of doing that what you do is you take ownership just like when you're in a in a seal platoon or you're in a business when something goes wrong you take
ownership of the problem so if instead of saying hey you didn't make the lunges that's why everyone's late instead you say hey you know what I notice everyone was a little bit late today tomorrow you know I think I can help out by getting
up a little bit earlier and making the lunches and well realistically and with my wife my wife would be you know my wife would say back to me no that's fine you got to go to work I slept in I shouldn't have done that so so it immediately reverses the defensive
attitude of what are you talking about I didn't make the lunches why am i making lunches it turns it into oh you know what no you have to go to work I'm gonna get up and make it's my fault I'll take care of it and and that's that's a great solution right that
that's problem solved and then people worry about it because they say what what if i if i said that to my wife you don't my wife would say they say yeah you should get up and make the lunches and then you know what I say get up and make the lunches it's gonna take you an
extra it takes take six minutes six minutes to get the lunches made probably not even that so no big deal get up a little earlier get up six minutes earlier actually make the lunch the night before and and it'll be fine and eventually most likely your wife is
gonna say hey you know what you need to make the bunches I'll do it I got it so that's what you do that's what you do you just like in any other leadership situation or even in a peer driven situation what you do is you take ownership when you take ownership of
things life gets better give it a shot that's the first question next question is from AB far and the question is what's Jacko's criteria about when you should quit and when to persevere in areas with opportunity costs like businesses so this is a definitely a
very good question especially if you know anything about the SEAL Teams one of the mottos of the SEAL Teams is never quit and I should say that's really more of a motto of the basic SEAL training that you go through the Budds training the the first block of training that you
go through when you when you join the Navy to be a seal at six months long and and the the underlying mantra there is don't quit and of course it actually makes very good sense in training in that training because that's how you make it through the training you don't
quit and people people I'll get kids that ask me nowadays you know I want to go on I'm not gonna go to the SEAL Teams I want to go and through SEAL training what advice do you have for man sir I was telling the same thing over and over again don't quit that's
that's how you get through the training don't quit so going through that training it makes sense but I'll tell you once you get to the actual SEAL Teams you have to take that attitude and you have to put it in some kind of perspective because that attitude can be
bad and the classic example of that is the young leader the young seal leader who comes up with a plan for a training mission but maybe it's not the best plan or maybe the circumstances change or something unexpected happens or the weather or the terrain isn't what wasn't
anticipated and the plan is not working that's what's going on the plant whatever plan they came up with is not working but that young leader has been told never quit so he keeps going and he keeps going and he keeps going and he keeps going and he
uses up all his energy and all his time and all his resources and all of his people because he had been taught never quit so that is actually wrong and you don't do that if you are trying something and you have given it a solid effort and it's not working then stop
doing it and step back and assess and see if there's another way to do it that is not quitting that is being smart I have a little rule I say don't bang my head into something 47 times I'll do 46 once you get to 46 then it's like okay you know what I gotta try a different
way this is not working so sometimes you have to step back you have to you have to quit the plan that you had and try something new now the other way to frame this is by looking at it from a tactical level and then from a strategic perspective tactical level meaning the
immediate situation right in front of you and the situation that's unfolding right now in this very period of time so like a firefight that's going on right now or this actual battle that we're in right now that's tactical that's what's
happening on a tactical level and then above that is the strategic level and this is the broad long-term overall objective that you are trying to achieve so those are the two different perspectives that you can look at this idea of when to quit
so in a war the tactical objective might be to take a hill right we're gonna take that hill that's our objective right now whereas the strategic objective might be to remove this tyrannical regime and stop their imperialistic endeavors that threaten your own nation-state so that's
the strategy that's what you are strategically trying to accomplish so now you look at those two things right if you're assaulting this hill and it's heavily defended and the hill is fortified and has massive enemy troops massive numbers of enemy troops in there
and you can't take that hill without suffering massive catastrophic losses yourself it's probably a good idea just to back off the hill a little bit and figure out another way of taking it or figuring out if you can actually bypass that hill see if you can avoid even
having to take that hill now that might be considered quitting right I'm not going up that hill I'm not gonna lose everyone trying to get up this hill but even though it might be considered quitting it also could be considered smart because why would you waste your
troops if there's another way to go about this if there's there's the and I'll tell you one reason that people continue doing this is a lot of times people will drive on a tactical mission and the only reason that they keep going is a because they've been told never
quit and be because their ego their ego their ego they're gonna stick with their plan they came up with their plan they want their plan to work and they're gonna go and are gonna keep going until everyone's dead that is not smart because if you backed off that
particular goal you could allocate your resources and your troops somewhere else where you might have a bigger impact so so quitting that tactical mission that low-level tactical mission it might not only be acceptable it might be a necessity because let's face it if all
you do is to attack Hills where everyone dies you're not gonna you're gonna lose strategically in the long run so sometimes you gotta back off sometimes you gotta you've got to quit that tactical mission and there's been plenty of times in history where that has
happened and and and people made tactical retreats we'll call it tactical quitting in order to win strategically so when when General George Washington led the retreat of Continental forces out of New York which was a lucky retreat because there was this massive fog and they were
able to do it clandestinely that that was a he quit but guess what he came back for the strategic win in World War one Gallipoli was some super hard fighting there labrats the Aussies the New Zealand troops French as well and they had really hard fighting and
eventually they realized that this wasn't working and they snuck away they they retreated did they quit I guess you could say they quit that tactical situation and it's the same thing I mean probably the most famous example this is Dunkirk at the beginning of World War
two when you know this this ad-hoc British Navy of merchant vessels and whatever else pulled out you know hundreds of thousands soldiers out of Europe so that they could regroup rebuild and re-engage so nkn by the way come back for the win for the strategic
win of getting rid of the tyrannical leader of Nazi Germany so was anyone calling the Brits Kuwaitis because they decided to save a massive number of their troops no it's okay we have to do a tactical retreat so yes sometimes you have to retreat but that doesn't mean
you quit the strategic mission you know it's like Churchill said never surrender but he didn't say never retreat so I think you have to do a little differentiation between quitting and retreating and that's that's what you need to do and you need to do the same
thing in life right because sometimes we come up with ideas we come up with plans that aren't as good as we think maybe they were and at some point you got to look at it from an honest perspective and see if maybe this isn't going to work maybe we can't take that hill and
that doesn't mean you know if you come up with one idea for a product and it doesn't work and you decide you're gonna retreat from it does that mean you just never come up with another product again when strategically what your goal was was to build a large business or
or become financially independent or be your own boss or whatever if you if you back off of one tactical mission or you quit with one product that you came up with does that mean you're never gonna do anything in business again no it just
means that you're gonna regroup you're gonna reload you're gonna come up with a better idea and then you're gonna do it you're gonna attack again you're gonna keep that strategic vision alive so I think that's it I think to sum this up that's kind of a long answer
I apologize to sum this up you might have to make some tactical retreats in order to win the long war but never quit on your strategic vision never quit on getting to the ultimate place where you want to go the next question is from Brendan and the question is how does
discipline pay a role in financial decisions on two levels macro slash investing and micro meaning daily and monthly budgets how has this changed recently well discipline equals freedom as you may have heard me said they say the first time I was on Tim's podcast if in
the example that in this situation is if you want financial freedom you need financial discipline so what does that mean that means you have to work hard you have to save your money you have to invest your money you have to not buy stupid things that you don't need I
often give the example of my 1997 Dodge Grand Caravan kind of rusted broken window on the driver's side that was taped shut but I drove that vehicle for I don't know ten or twelve years and the reason I did is because I was saving money I also lived in a house that was
934 square feet it had two bedrooms and I had three kids two girls and a boy and my wife and my wife and I slept in the living room and when you opened the front door to our house to the right was a couch and to the left was our bed and
that's where we slept and right next to our bed was the dining room table so like our front room of our house was the bedroom dining room and living room all all in one big room zero privacy but that's where we left why do we live there because it was in a location that
we liked and we were saving money I pretty much always wore the same clothes my guys used to give me a hard time because I would wear jungle boots out on Liberty with my normal clothes why cuz I'm not gonna go out and buy some pair of fashionable shoes I caught
my own hair so I have a pair of clippers that I've had forever and I cut my own hair so that's the discipline that I think put you in a good place later on in life when you save money up front and so now when we talk about macro investing what do I do now I like to put
my money into well actually into my businesses and it's things that I own things that I control things that I know about and so I do that and I like to buy properties so I invest of investment properties and in Ana I take other opportunities if there's something that
I have an understanding of some business opportunity then I'll put my money in that I will said I do have a nicer car now I no longer drive the 1997 Dodge Grand Caravan may she rest in peace I also instill a little bit I still even though I have more money now I still am
a person that struggles to spend money on things and I will research some stupid purchase for three months to figure out if it's something that I really need to figure out if it's the actual one that I want and all that so so there you go I I guess on a macro
thing I look to buy big things or I look to invest in big things like properties and businesses and on the micro I look to buy nothing I don't want it I don't need it and I'm trying not to buy it so there's that next question is from Joey and he says how do you balance your time
as a father with your business podcast workouts and then there's a follow-on question what values do you hope to pass on to your children so this is a question that everyone wants the secret answer to and you how do you balance your time with your
family versus your time with work and the answer is that that is the answer you have to balance it so what do i do yes do I wake up early I do I wake up really do I stay up late yes I do I try and do things before and after my family is awake or before that or after they
fall asleep so that I'm I'm working when they're sleeping which seems to work out well in terms of trying to spend more time with them in like in the morning in the morning I'll wake up early and work out so that way when they're when they get up and they're eating their
breakfast wherever I can say hi to him and talk to him a little bit I also try and do things that are that are mutually beneficial to everyone to all of us so for instance I like to do things with my wife and kids like work out together or
do jujitsu together or wrestle or surf I like to do things that that I like to do and that they like to do too so that seems to do a good job of spending more time with the family I I don't always do a great job of this I have missed some pretty critical events with my kids
because of work and that's a sad reality I've missed some some pretty big events because I've had things that I had to do I had commitments I had contractual obligations that I couldn't get out of and so would miss and you know I've missed some pretty important things for
my kids and I definitely feel bad about that and I'll say this though they also learn from that because when they see that I am doing that I'm doing putting a big placing a big importance on work they realize that work is important they
realize that you have to be dedicated to your work they see me up early working they see me staying up late working and they know from seeing that that if they want to get anywhere there's going to be sacrifices that have to get made so that's it I I also often explained this
to people you know you you get a job and you work hard so that you can earn money so that you can take care of your family and that being said if you focus too much on working hard and too much on your job well then eventually if you look up you'll look at your family they
won't be there anymore because you weren't paying enough attention to them so you you can't let that happen the other end of the spectrum is you're trying to take care of your family so you're trying to spend all your time with your family which means you stop
paying attention to work like you should and instead of going through the meeting you're at you know the parent-teacher conference and instead of going to the the networking event at your company you're you're going to the recital for your you know six-year-olds piano and
eventually you look up and you realize that you're not where you want to be work wise and maybe you're getting let go maybe you're not promoting the way you want to so that's not good either so that's why as I said to kick this off the the key is balance you have to find
the balance on these things if you focus too much on work you won't have a family if you focus too much on family you won't have work so get balanced the second part of this question was what values do I hope to pass on to my kids I think the values that are trying to pass
on to my kids are pretty much the standard kind of human values and to be really simple about how to discuss this well I wrote I wrote multiple kids books trying to pass on the values that I think are important for kids the first book that I wrote for kids was called
way the warrior kid and the the first book is about a kid who's kind of having that same normal problems that every kid has he's can't do any pull-ups he doesn't know how to swim he doesn't know his times tables and he's getting picked
on at school and what happens is kind of last day at school he's all sad and bummed out and he gets called out for not being able to do any pull-ups and not knowing how to swim and he runs behind the librarian he's crying and eventually heads home from his last day
of school and then he remembers that his uncle Jake is coming to stay with him for the summertime and his uncle Jake was in the SEAL Teams and his uncle Jake when they when he shows up you know they start talking and he says hey you know what do you want to do tomorrow you want
to go you want to go play some ball you want to go for a swim and he says then the kid whose name is Mark says well you know I can't I can't swim and I don't know my times table I'm getting picked on and I can't do any pull-ups he starts
crying and Uncle Jake looks at him and says hey listen all these problems that you've got they can be solved and then they go on the the mission over the summer of working out eating right learning how to study learning jujitsu learning how to swim overcoming his fear
of water all those things happen and one of the parts that's embedded in the story is that Uncle Jake talks about how warriors live by a code and he encourages young mark to write his own warrior kid code and in that warrior kid code I pretty much passed forth of the
values that I try and give to my kids and so here's the warrior kid code from the book way the warrior kid the number one the warrior kid wakes up early in the morning the warrior kids studies to learn and gain knowledge and asks questions if he doesn't understand the
warrior kid trains hard exercises and eats right to be strong and fast and healthy the warrior kid trains to know how to fight so he can stand up to bullies and protect the weak the warrior kid treats people with respect doesn't judge them and helps out other people
whenever possible the warrior kid keeps things neat and is always prepared and ready for action the warrior kid stays humble controls his ego and stays calm warrior kids do not lose their tempers the warrior kid works hard saves money is frugal and
doesn't waste things and always does his best I am the warrior kid and I am leader so that's the warrior kid code and that warrior kid code that's actually the one that I just read is from the third book in the series because each book young mark adds a
little something to the warrior kid Cody adds he learns a life lesson and then he adds it to his warrior kid code and so that's those the values that I try and pass on it and that's I also I also do a kid's podcast called the warrior kid podcast and what the funnest part I've
had with that warrior kid podcast cuz it started off me just doing questions for Uncle Jake and then I would answer the questions and kid which kids would say is is pepperoni healthy and so I'd answer these great questions from these kids and but eventually what I started
doing is I started telling stories from Uncle Jake where uncle Jake would talk about where he was a kid or when when he was a kid and they would kind of capture some important lesson that he learned and they're all just kind of parable stories that again back to this question
teach the values that I think kids should have and that's the what the stories do the stories are meant to explain where uncle Jake got his values from so yeah those are the warrior kid podcast if you want to check that out and the warrior kid books all right next
question and it says I'd like to hear his thoughts on sexual harassment toxic masculinity and then it says I am working to teach my son's about matters like consent okay so I know this has been a big big topic toxic masculinity and I'm not a psychologist certainly I
don't claim to be you know some somebody that understands everything but you know what I have spent a lot of time around alpha males so I spent 20 years in the SEAL Teams and there's a lot of alpha male type human beings in there I have my own son so I have a decent
understanding of the male human I also like I said I've been married for 21 years and I have three daughters by the way one of them's 19 one of them's 18 and one of them is nine that that counteract the testosterone of my sixteen-year-old
son to the best of their ability but my point is I I have some experience with both sides of this situation and so so for me toxic masculinity is sort of saying that at least for the best of the best that I can interpret what it what they're trying to say is that if you
take sort of traditional masculine traits and then you take them to the extreme well then it becomes negative and well that's a true statement that's actually a true statement so and it goes back to the book dichotomy in leadership is that if you take any positive trait
that a good leader can have and you take it to an extreme then it can become a negative so this is gonna happen with any traits that any human being has if you take a human trait to an extreme it often becomes a negative so I mean a clear one is if you're a good leader
then you need to be aggressive right that's what you need to be and that being said if you're too aggressive then you're taking risks that are not necessary and that's not gonna work how good for you so that's why you you you can't take the aggressive trait to the
extreme same thing with being ambitious right because everyone you know a good leader a good person a good kid is ambitious but guess what if someone becomes too ambitious then they're stepping on other people so that they can rise to the top and by the way that
that rise to the top will be short-lived that's why it's not beneficial because you might think well if you're ambitious you step on people that you make it to the top you're good to go it doesn't work that way cuz other people are gonna see that you're stepping on them and they're
gonna rip you down so the group that you're leading when you're stepping on them will turn against you so yes you should be ambitious but you can't be extremely you can't take that to the extreme being strong let's being just physically strong that's
that's a great that's a great attribute to have because because then you are harder to bully right is it no one's gonna push you around when you're a strong individual that being said if you go to you go too far with that and you begin to abuse the strength that you
have to bully other people well then that's not good and once again I'll tell you if you do that the pack will turn against you and take you down and so there's all these traits that these are considered sort of masculine traits like being assertive right and and that is
definitely true if you're if you're a good leader and I go from you know a man to just be talking about leadership if you're a good leader then you should be assertive that being said if you're too assertive then you don't listen anyone elses ideas and and so that puts you at
a disadvantage because you're trying to figure out everything for yourself and you won't be able to do that so what else what else for traditional masculine traits oh to be less emotional right the the the man is supposed to rely more on
logic than emotion and that certainly makes sense as a leader because there's no one that makes good decisions when they're emotional now the dichotomy is that if you are completely devoid of emotions then you don't connect with anyone you don't you don't have any
emotional connection with anyone and as a leader if you don't have emotional connections with people then you won't truly be able to lead them you'll be able to lead them on like a surface level but you won't have the deep connection that forms a solid bond
inside of a team you won't have that and so the list of these traits it's it goes on and on and and like I said these are sort of these traditional masculine traits and if you take them to the extreme then they become negative oh and also you've got to remember that it's
not just one extreme there's the other there's the opposite extreme as well and if you go in the opposite direction to the extreme then that's equal bad so if you've got a leader that's hyper aggressive right we don't want that but at the same time we don't want
a leader that's a pushover just like we don't want someone that's overly assertive right if you're if you're overly assertive then you're not listening to anyone else but at the same time if you go in the other direction to the other extreme then you've got
someone that's scared to speak up so that's not good either and then talking about the emotional thing again like we don't want a leader that's completely devoid of emotions but at the same time you don't want a leader that's overly emotional and is unstable and not able
to think logically and clearly so these things these things need to be balanced that's what they need to be they need to be balanced in leaders they need to be balanced in men and the fact that matter is is that all these traits are equally positive for women and they also need to
be balanced with women as well so to me this idea of toxic masculinity is just reflective of taking any human traits to an extreme male or female doesn't matter if you if you don't properly balance the dichotomy of these traits that human
beings have you'll be out of balance and will be a bad thing so try and stay balanced that is to me the best solution to these types of issues all right next question is from white belt MMA s I have no idea what that means but I'm glad you have the white belt attitude that's a
good attitude to have what our Jacko's experiences with cold or heat therapy cold showers ice baths saunas etc okay I'm definitely a believer in contrast baths if you know what that is contrast baths are going from hot to cold I mean I like them both
individually but hot to cold I definitely I had a I had a situation that unfolded for me that really sent it home I was I was at San Clemente Island which is a little training site off the coast of Southern California and on that island that there's a hill called Frog
Hill and when you're going through basic SEAL training you run up that hill before every meal and sometimes you carry things on your back or whatever but it's a really steep hill and it takes a few minutes to climb up and it burns you out pretty good so
anyways I was out there for I wasn't going through SEAL training but I was out there doing some training with some other troops and so while I was out there I decided you know I'm just gonna run frog Hill every day for every meal just like we did in bud snow just trying
to stay hard and then I all I was out there and this was probably ten years ago or something like that maybe 12 years ago I don't know but late late 2009 something like that and while I was out there I also was working out hard you know and I did this this CrossFit
workout this CrossFit workout which is called Cal soo and and this this workout is named after a guy while it's named after a guy whose name was Cal suebob Cal soo who was an all-american football player for the University of Oklahoma and then he played for the Buffalo Bills
in the 1968 season he was the Rookie of the Year and after that season he went and did his time in the army because he had gone through I guess I'm an ROTC scholarship and had an ROTC obligation to the army and so he went in the army to serve his time he went to the hundred
and first Airborne Division and deployed to Vietnam and he was killed in action and so this this work out like the man himself is a is a tough workout tough man tough workout in fact I'd say it a little bit harder than tough it's actually a pretty brutal workout and
here's the workout if you want to try this it's psycho every minute on the minute so every minute you do five burpees and then you do as many thrusters as you can with 135 pounds and thruster is basically a front squat and then push press so you do that so you do every
minute you do five and then you do max thrusters with 135 pounds and you keep doing this over and over again until you get to a hundred total thrusters and it is like a complete soul-crushing leg destroyer of a workout and anyways I did that work
out and plus I was running frog hills so my legs were pretty much just completely annihilated and then I was supposed to be flying back to Coronado to where I was working at the time the training command out on the west coast I was flying back there I was supposed to fly
back at in the middle that like for lunch but our training ended I ended up getting the first flight back from San Clemente Island it was like 6 o'clock in the morning and when I got back the Master Chief so I was the I was the officer in charge
of trade it at the time in the Master Chief who was a who was kind of a runner type guy and he picked me up from the airport he's like hey man we're doing a we're doing a command PT today which means we're all gonna work out and do physical training together and I'm like
oh cool you know cuz it's sort of you know I'm the I'm the I'm the officer in charge so if we're having command PT then I should do it and he goes ok great it's a you know we're doing a run and we're doing a run down this there's a lake and in San Diego and it's it's got
a trail around it it's like a seven or eight mile or something like that but there's it's got a lot lots of little these little hills so cool you know I already signed up for it so we get we get we go and we go to do this run and my legs are already crushed when I start
this run and then I end up racing with one of my buddies who who's actually a better runner than I am and but I'm giving it everything I got to to hang with him and I hang with him until probably the last I don't know mile got back from the lake went to the team and
when I got back to the training command I went into our physical therapy guys and I said hey man I just annihilated my legs and I've been annihilating for like five straight days what do you got and the guy that worked there who is a awesome guy named Jason he said hey to
contrast baths and look what's that he hot-cold hot-cold hot-cold so anyways he put me in this protocol for ice bath to the to the whirlpool the hot whirlpool which is scolding hot anyways I did the protocol I think it was like five minutes five minutes four
minutes four minutes three minutes three minutes two minutes two minutes one way to one of it and I am not kidding when I got done with that I was probably 60% recovered just from that so do I believe in Kolding he therapy yes I have a Jacuzzi at my house and I have a nice
bath at my house so I believe in him they work be careful if you ever do that workout it hurts next question what is one piece of advice you'd give a man who's on the brink of finishing it all tonight so you know this is one of those questions that
comes across from time to time when people are feeling like they have reached the point where they cannot go on anymore and so this is from anonymous and I'll tell you right now what I'm gonna tell you is number one okay we're gonna wait until tomorrow and then and
so this is gonna sound like I guess like a cop out of an answer or like a week answer but then what you do is you actually go and get some professional help from someone and and and the reason that I'm saying that is because I only just recently kind of put this together
it is the fact that I didn't know anything about psychologists and psychology I thought that they were just kind of weird people that would tell you some mumbo-jumbo stuff I didn't really understand it I didn't know anything about it and I had
I had Jordan Peterson on my podcast and we were talking about a bunch of different subjects and he was talking about how Houston I think he was talking about how he would get people to overcome fear of needles and he went through this thing and what he explained
was called exposure therapy and I didn't know what it was but it made perfect sense to me and then as he was explaining it I realized what he was explaining was this methodology of exposure therapy and that methodology is the exact methodology that I had used in
the first way the warrior kid book to teach this young kid mark to overcome his fear of water so I just kind of used instinctively something that I'd used with my kids when they were afraid of something I would expose them to it a little bit a little bit a little bit a
little bit and then over time they would not be afraid of it anymore and so it's something that I had used but but when Jordan Peterson who's a clinical psychologist talked about it this is an actual psychological procedure and and that's when I started
to kind of make this connection is is the fact that psychologists what they are is they're basically like mechanics they're like car mechanics but they're mechanics for your brain or your mind or whatever your thoughts because your brain or your mind your thoughts can
have problems just like your car can have a problem and what psychologists know how to do just like a mechanic knows how to do is they know how to assess the problem and then give you a solution to the problem and I think the fact that they're called psychologists
kind of threw me off for for my life and if they would have been called something that the term I've been calling him his mind and mechanics so if you if you said oh I got problem with my mind I'm gonna go to the mechanic and have it get fixed that that makes sense right there's no
mumbo-jumbo there the psychologists learn about what type of symptoms there are and then they figure out how to solve those and they learn techniques and and procedures and protocols so that so it's real is what I'm saying so so to you anonymous
that asks this question you need them you need a mind mechanic you know you got an issue going on in there and you got to get someone that knows how to identify diagnose what the problem is and then give you a solution to it so hang in there go get some help that
that's what you need a professional help I'm not a mind mechanic I'm not a psychologist but there are people that actually know how to help you and so go get some go get some professional help that's that's what you need another thing I mean you know Tim came on my
podcast it's its podcast number 50 and you know it's it's a crazy thing and a lot of people they either don't know this or they haven't heard about it or it's easy to forget that tim was you know when he was in college he not only contemplated committing suicide but he
actually planned to commit suicide and so when he came on my podcast we went deep on that and we talked through it and so if you're in that situation you know Tim's a great example you know it's he's a he's a was doing great you know from the outside you know
he was going to an Ivy League school and you know things were you would look from the outside and say oh this guy's got nothing to worry about his life is set but on the inside you know he was in a really rough place and in a place that was so rough that he was thinking that
maybe he didn't want to continue on so take a listen to that one you can hear some of the things that Tim did and continues to do to maintain a positive attitude about where he's at and then man go and get some professional help because there's there's darkness out
there and sometimes that that darkness in the world that surrounds your head but you can get out of it man good luck brother the next question is also from anonymous one is a step-by-step guide for building discipline for someone who has little to
none of it I'll keep this one short I answer this question a lot before you go to bed make a list of the things that you need to do tomorrow so whatever those things are you make you write them down work out you're going to do you know this project or
that project you need this task or that ask whatever they are you write them down and then you set your alarm clock and you said it earlier than you normally would okay look people get hung up because I wake up at 4:30 that's just when I get up you figure out when it's good for you
to get up make it a little bit earlier like an hour earlier or a half hour earlier than you normally would set your alarm clock then go to sleep then when your alarm clock goes off get just get up get up no don't think about it don't
rationalize anything no snooze button no just five more minutes just get up when your alarm clock goes off put on your workout clothes which you should have laid out the night before I should have said that to brush your teeth and go work out get that done then shower pull
out the list that you made and attack that list and get everything on that list done that's what you do and then the next day do the same thing and the day after that do the same thing and then imagine what your life is going to be like in a week after a week of doing
that or after a month of doing that or after three months of doing that or after a year of doing that you're gonna be in a totally different place if you just do the things that you know you're supposed to do every day you'll be in a totally different place now
will the discipline get easier over time we look it easier doesn't matter does it doesn't matter it doesn't matter it doesn't matter if it's easy hard you don't think about it you don't consider that just just do what you're supposed to do and then just stay on the path
because even though it might not get easier the rewards are going to grow and you'll realize that the discipline you are imposing into your life is making your life better and giving you more freedom the question 12 how do you build mental toughness and resilience the answer is
you actually already have it you are a human being and human beings can survive the most insane adversity that you can imagine I talked about it on my podcast all the time these these people that go through these atrocities or go through these insane combat situations or get
put into prison camps they're not superheroes they're people they're normal people that got drafted or that signed up after Pearl or that got recalled when the Korean War kicked off or or got sent to Vietnam because it was either that or go to jail
they're normal people and they have the mental toughness and resilience and so do you now you want to help reveal it cool do some hard things do some mental and some physical challenges that row that require you to push yourself harder get some
that's fine that'll reveal some of that mental toughness but you have it and as I said in Tim's book tools of Titan's if you want to be tough be tougher don't need to meditate on it just be tougher you already have it next question if he had not been in the military what would
he have done instead right if I was in the military if I couldn't join the military likely would have been probably a policeman or a firefighter I think I have a pretty inherent sense of duty some patriotic feeling to serve and and you know straight up I also like some
kind of like level of danger and I like to take some level of risks and I feel good about those they make me feel make me feel alive and I like physical work I like doing things like I like physically moving around and getting things done
and making things happen and I like I actually like high-stress situations so I I enjoy mayhem and chaos and it's where and when I say I enjoy him that doesn't mean I'm about seeking him every day but when they hit me that's where I feel like I'm in my I mean I'm utilizing
the best of my natural capabilities because I'm I'm calm under pressure I stay relaxed I stay detached I can look at like complex problems and kind of simplify them well so I like being in those situations so that's why I think either one of those jobs probably would
have been what I would end up doing next question is from Zak V my five-year-old son has been doing jiu-jitsu for two weeks now and he's not aggressive how do you teach someone to turn on aggression so Zach bro your kid is 5 - do not worry
about your kids aggression level at this age in fact what you need to do is be happy that he hasn't hyper aggressive kid that is slapping other kids around and can't get along with other kids that's a problem so don't worry about this it's no factor and I've not only if
I brought my kids up but I've seen I would say hundreds of kids go through jiu-jitsu in their life and you don't need to worry about this you don't need to worry about trying them to teach them to turn on their aggression in fact instead of teaching them to turn on this
aggression I would teach him how to be nice and how to play guitar and how to be respectful and polite to other people that's what I would would teach him because when he turns 14 you're gonna have to do everything in your power to rein that aggression in that's gonna
come so you don't need to egg it on it'll be there now if it's not there the whether or not he ends up being aggressive it is still one of the best gifts that you can give him is given jiu-jitsu but let me tell you what it do please don't ruin it for him don't ruin
jiu-jitsu for him the best way to make him good at jiu-jitsu is actually by making it fun for him he's 5 years old you want to make it fun I failed to do that with my older daughters we might older daughters I pushed them too hard I was forcing it down their throat I was
making them train 6 days a week ghee no ghee striking making him compete and when I did make him compete I put them in there against older kids and heavier kids the kids that were better than them and they'd get beat and I thought of course in my mind I thought I
was like being an awesome dad because I was making them super tough oh you know what you're oh you're six years old cool and put you against a nine year old girl who is outweighs you by 22 pounds and you're gonna get destroyed but you know
what it's gonna be good for your character it's gonna make you tough that's what that's what my idiot mind was thinking and what I actually ended up doing was making them not like jiu-jitsu so don't do that to your son what you want to do is you want to make
it fun and you want to find a school where it's fun and you know what even that's no guarantee cuz your kid may not loved you Jitsu but at least if it's fun he's gonna learn it but but yeah I'm sorry to break the news to you that you can't make your kid love
jujitsu you you can make it part of his life but he's this isn't I'm sorry again to break the news to you but your son is an individual human being and you know I got four kids and all my kids are great kids and I can tell you this and this is a hard fact for parents to realize it
was a hard fact for me to realize your kids are not going to be what you want them to be and case in point I asked I asked this question to people all the time I say are you what your parents want you to wanted you to be everyone says no who grows up and becomes exactly
what their parents wanted them to be no one so the chances of you getting your kid to be exactly the person you want him to be the chances of that are zero he's not gonna be who you want them to be so what you do a matter of fact if you if the more you try and conform him
into being what you wanted to be the more you try and box him in the more he is going to resent it the more he's gonna push back against you so don't do that don't try and don't try and box them in be supportive make it fun now I'm not saying you'd let kids do
whatever you want cuz you don't do that you get you put them you give them discipline you give them a box that they need to stand and then you show them the path but you don't put a dagger in their back and force them to walk down it you
let them find their own way down the path because they'll understand it better and they'll be better people next question you have started multiple companies and businesses and you were on since you were first on Tim's podcasts over three years ago they all seem to be
doing great how do you do that yeah so I have started a bunch of businesses and they all seem to be doing really well and certainly stoked on that as far as how do I do that I would say two major things and the first thing that I would say is that I get involved
in businesses that are related to things that I know about that I understand so like the first business that I ever had was an MMA gym I still have it it's called victory MMA and we changed Jitsu and and boxing wrestling without all that stuff but the reason I started this
gym is because it's something that I knew and understood we've been I've been trying to in jiu-jitsu for a long time and been training MMA fighters for a long time and so this is something that I knew and understood so we started gym the the second real business that I
started was echelon front which is the consulting company that had with my brother Leif babban and a bunch of other guys we have on the team now but again I started that company was like this is something that I knew and understood we're teaching people leadership and
teaching leadership is exactly what I was doing my last few years in the SEAL Teams so I started a company that really that was based directly around something that I knew something that Lafe knew and now when we bring other guys on the team
it's something that everyone knows and understands so that was kind of evidence it was it was a very clear that that's something that I had the capability and understanding of I guess the next one down the list would be when a mighty the jackal white tee which this is something
that it was actually with Tim I was with Tim and Tim talked about it all the first time I was on his podcast and it was just like a little funny statement he said and and then people kept asking me you know what's the T what's the T was the T so I just started you know
making the T and getting out there and people were stoked on it and so there you go that's something that I knew and I knew that I liked it and started making it and then you know that kind of led to the rest of the supplements that I make because I like certain I like to
take certain things and and I want to take things that I know things that I trust and things that I actually use and so that's what I did made stuff that tasted good that worked well and there you go and and then along the way you know I got involved with with origin
main which is a which is a company up in Maine which is manufacturing apparel right here in America in Maine and you know that was really more than anything else because I didn't really have a background in that but what happened was I got I saw I saw a really kind of a
perfect storm brewing this this guy that I had seen videos of on the internet from origin he's the he was the founder of origin he's gotta name Pete Roberts and the thee had these videos on YouTube and he's a jujitsu guy and he he wanted
to make keys he wanted to make keys in America and there was no making keys in America in a matter of fact he found out that there was no one making the material to make keys in America so we're making the fabric to make keys in America so he went on this kind of like
psycho quest to try and make that happen and he had these videos of himself up in Maine and him and his buddies pulling these these the actually a loom is it's not these it's one loom he went and found a rusty old loom abandoned loom in
an abandoned Factory in Lewiston Maine and they you know he pulled it out of this factory and brought it back to his place where he had built a factory built a timber factory in the middle of the woods in Maine and put this loom in there and hired a guy that used to work
on these looms and they got that thing running and he was up there making these american-made geese and the the problem was he was the problem was he was in Maine and he was you know didn't really he didn't have much reach and so I reached out to him a couple times and
eventually got in touch with him and and we were able to you know I kind of had reach and and had people to talk to and way a way to spread the word and then he had the knowledge you know that he gained to to start making apparel and all that stuff and so that's what we're
doing so I just want to do one to help him make America make again make America make again you know that it I'm from New England and when you see the abandoned factories it's it's a it's a horrible it's a horrible sight and so for us to be up there to have that company to be
breathing life back into an industry that had been left for dead and to now be making Gea's and making rash guards and and other athletic apparel and we we just came out with jeans because what's more American than didn't damn blue jeans so you know I said hey Pete well
actually what I said to Pete was I said hey Pete how many people do you know that dude jiu-jitsu and Pete said oh you know I probably 100 I said how many people do you know that have jeans and I was standing in the airport at the time and I said 80% of the people I'm looking
at right now we're wearing jeans let's make jeans and even I'm not wearing a gay pants right now I'm wearing jeans so we started making jeans now we're making boots so we'll make everything so that's that's what happened there and and then the last one
I guess the most recent company is the is the publishing company is is jaakko publishing and that one so that one's a little bit more of a interesting situation I had written another kid's book called Mikey and the Dragons and and this book I was super stoked on it I
finished it in August and I talked to my publisher and I said hey you know I've got this new kids book and I just want to get it out by Christmas cuz I want and the book is about a little kid that learns how to overcome fear and it's a
rhyming story and has amazing pictures in it that one of my buddies drew and so I was just this really great book when I read it to my youngest daughter you know she was just blown away by it my wife actually reaction was did you actually write that so I thought that was a
really good compliment she didn't actually believe I was capable of doing it so anyways I was super stoked and got this and and I said to my publisher I said hey you know I want this book to come out by Christmas and this was in August and they said well no that's not
not possible and I said well no please and they said well nothing we can't do it and I said no seriously I really wanted out by then and then they said there's no scenario where this book comes out by Christmas and I said watch this so I had a friend
that you know a friend that she had was in the publishing business and I said hey can you help me make this happen and she said let's do it and so started the publishing company and book came out in November Mikey and the Dragons and now I have a publishing company I got another
couple books in the works for the for the publishing company from not just me but I got another couple authors that I'm working with that are putting books together that are awesome so there you go so all those things are saying all those different businesses as I said
like these are all things that I kind of know and understand and that's that's I'd say part one of me figuring out what businesses I want to do and then the second part the second part is that I actually follow my own leadership principles that's the the principles
that I teach I utilize them myself and I cover move I keep things simple I prioritize and execute I implement decentralized command and that's a really big one because you know I've got people I've got people on my teams that they damn decentralized command they
know what my vision is and they are free to go out there and make it happen to the best of their ability and if they need support they come back to me if they need guidance they come back to me and if they don't then they're out there crushing it so that's that's what
happens they're making these things happen and I'm kind of looking up and out and to see what's next down the line and see what else we can get into so yeah try and get involved in what you know and understand and then follow the fundamental leadership principles
fundamental combat leadership principles one more question here this is from Oliver and he says what is your biggest failure well for me this is pretty straightforward pretty straightforward answer when I was in the Navy when I was in the SEAL Teams my last tour
was in Iraq I was the commander of SEAL team 3 tasking a bruiser we fought in the Battle of Ramadi in the summer of 2006 we did our job well we had the honor of supporting these soldiers and Marines from the 1st Brigade 1st Armored Division and we all
fought together to defeat the brutal insurgents that were there and it was a very tough battlefield it was a tough fight it was an honor to serve alongside those soldiers and Marines and the task unit that I was in charge of really performed exceptionally day after day
after day and in the end victory was achieved in the city of Ramadi and Ramadi was liberated from the sadistic insurgents that had reigned there the people were allowed to return to their normal lives but I did not bring home all my men then that's that so
thanks to everyone for listening thanks to Tim for having me on and for everything you've done to help me out I started my podcast because of Tim and and and Jill Rogan as well and Jill Rogen heard me because of Tim in the first place so thanks to Tim if you want
to hear anything else from me I'm on Twitter and I'm on Instagram and I'm on Facebook at Chaco willing my podcast is called jaakko podcasts it's wherever you get your podcasts the books that I've written are on Amazon and other places
books are sold my clothes are on Jocko store calm my supplements red orange in Maine calm my consulting companies echelon front calm its Ilana comms for you anyways that's all I've got again thanks to Tim for having me on and thanks to everyone that is listening to
this thanks for spreading the word thanks for of course going out there and getting after it this is Jacques a will Inc no further traffic oh hey guys this is Tim again just a few more things before you take off number one this is five bullet Friday do you want to get a
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