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One of my greatest lessons has been in one of the greatest pains I had, and that was a heartbreak.
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Hip-hop icon Common is an Academy Award Emmy and three-time Grammy winning artist.
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What was the hardest part about learning to love yourself and take care of yourself?
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Sometimes I can bring that little Rashid into the present and those feelings of being rejected and make this new rejection greater than what it really is.
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Heartbreak, therapy, talking about the trauma you've been through.
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These are not themes that hip-hop's known for.
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All I was doing was telling my truth.
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How have you learned in the moment to deal with that emotion and to learn how to trust?
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>> You understand what energy you want in your life and who deserves to be in your life.
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I usually wouldn't seize the moment.
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The thought came to me like, I'm going to call John Legend, and I tell him, "Hey, man, I'm part of this movie Selma.
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They don't want a song from us, so we submitting it, but will you do the song?"
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And he said, The number one health and wellness podcast. Jay Shetty. Jay Shetty.
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The one, the only Jay Shetty.
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I'm so excited to finally share the live interviews from my very first podcast tour presented by Chase Sapphire Reserve.
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This one was recorded live at the legendary Chicago Theatre with the one and only Common.
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Special thanks to MSG Entertainment and the Chicago Theatre. Chicago, Chicago, peace.
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I love this place, Chicago.
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I am so excited to be here tonight at the Chicago Theatre in Chicago with Mr. Chicago. >> What a blessing. Thank you. >> and only Common. Uh Thank you.
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Common, I I want to start off by just saying how grateful I am to you for your artistry.
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I grew up listening to you in London.
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Your music, your words, your energy has made it all the way over to the 14-year-old me who was dreaming of being a rapper. Wow.
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And and then I listened to you and realized I wasn't good enough. >> No, no, no.
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>> and we've spoken before.
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We never met until tonight. >> Yeah.
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And your voice has such a power.
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It carries so much energy.
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It carries so much that the frequency you operate at comes through your voice so powerfully and I want to start off by asking you, you know, today obviously we know you as the Emmy Award winner, the Grammy Award winner, the Oscar Award winner. Yeah. Yeah, give it up, right?
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It's like there's not many people. There's not many people.
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But I want to know who Common was before Yeah.
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the Emmy, the Grammy, the Oscar because that's what we've been talking about tonight is when you're at the start of your journey.
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Who were you at the start of your journey?
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Well, first, thank you, Jay, and thank you all.
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And I just thank God for this moment.
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Um and who I was before I was out as an artist, I was a young black boy from the south side of Chicago who who had a a tremendous incredible mother and a great stepfather and a beautiful community that taught me everything from God to to survival to intelligence to life and to love.
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And that gave me a foundation of someone who wanted to actually be something in the world.
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I didn't know what I wanted to be all the way, but I knew I wanted to give something to the world.
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And that's who I was before I actually got to be out there as an artist.
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Some of my dreams was basketball, to be a basketball player.
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Um but I can't hoop, y'all. Just just so you know.
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Not as good as I used to, but I can hoop.
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But uh yeah, so you know, I just wanted to be something it it's something OJ that one thing that got me when I was really a young kid was I used to love this English class because our English teacher would teach us a lot about like black history and and like all these great writers from James Baldwin and Dr.
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Maya Angelou and and um Nikki Giovanni and Richard Wright.
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So, one day she told us the story about this young man named Emmett Till.
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And Emmett Till was from Chicago and in the '50s, I believe it was 1955, but he went to visit his family down in Mississippi and went to the corner store with his cousins and was accused of um whistling at a white woman.
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And her husband eventually found where Emmett Till lived when he was staying with his aunt for the summer and they they grabbed him out of the house and they ended up um beating him to death and threw him in the river.
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The reason why I bring this story up is his mother chose to show have a open casket funeral and his head was bigger than I can describe.
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And the way they had beat him for whistling at a white woman what what what he was accused of, it always hit me in a place where I felt almost like guilty. I felt pain.
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I felt like I owed Emmett Till.
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And that was really a real driving force in my life.
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Though I never met Emmett Till in my life, his spirit was like something that I felt like I had to live for and for those people who had been like him who had lost their lives for no reason but specifically Emmett Till.
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Now, that was one of the driving forces for me as a kid even though I didn't know what I wanted to be and um I I just want to say that that that meant a lot to me. It's incredible. Yeah, absolutely. Absolutely. Go for it.
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It's it's incredible to me how people we've never met and people we've never seen how their stories can transform our lives.
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For me, when I was growing up, I was reading everything from David Beckham Yes.
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>> and Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson when he was a wrestler all the way through to Martin Luther King and Malcolm X. >> Yes.
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And I was really lucky that my dad would give me biographies and autobiographies of these people and it was because of him handing them to me that I got so inspired by people who'd lived these service-based lives. >> Yes.
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But I wanted to ask you when you read that story, when you heard about that story, how did you not get bitter or negative but become hopeful about wanting to represent and live a good life because hearing about those kind of pains and struggles can also make you act different, but for you it pushed you to want to do something positive with your life.
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The killing of Emmett Till was really the catalyst, many believe, for the civil rights movement.
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And how that affected me was man, I felt like this beautiful young man didn't have like that evil energy to him, that dark energy to him, and I felt that I wanted to be a reflection of that.
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I strive to approach life in ways where when I was go through something, I would figure a way out by figuring out the positive, the the lesson in it.
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And I didn't have that type of like information as a kid or like I didn't have it like really developed, but I knew that as a kid that I didn't want to be putting negative energy out there even when I was dealing with difficult moments.
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That didn't mean I didn't feel those difficult moments or I didn't have the anger, but I couldn't stay there.
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And I knew when I saw what happened with with Emmett Till, yes, of course I did feel some anger and like why did that happen to him?
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But I knew I had to make it into a positive and I wanted my life to feel positive and I wanted others' lives to feel positive.
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So, that's what I used it for and eventually in certain aspects of my life I've been able to translate that, you know, and that's what part of the practice is the of what we do.
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Like I'm so grateful that I know you can rhyme, too. I know you can rhyme.
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I I know you can rhyme, but I'm so grateful in how you are using your words and your gifts and your spirit and your heart.
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It's It's amazing how the things that we do to build to get to you would never know that your love for writing would like lead you to this place.
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And I would never know that like the things that I experienced whether it was with Emmett Till or on a positive note.
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Some people don't know this.
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Um I was a ball boy for the Chicago Bulls, right? Yeah. I was a ball boy.
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So, so I was there when Michael Jordan first came into the league.
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In fact, I used to have some Jordans.
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I used to get gym shoes or sneakers as people say.
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When in Chicago, we say gym shoes.
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So, so um I used to get gym shoes from a lot of players and at the time I would give them to my teachers. I would sell them.
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But I had some Jordans that I gave to my father that he signed.
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My father would, God bless his soul, he would wear them to my concerts and I'd be like, "Dad, do not wear these shoes, man.
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These shoes is worth too much."
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That being said, I didn't know, you know, it's amazing how as you said, sometimes well, I did get to be around Michael Jordan.
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I didn't know him well, but I got to see that.
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It's amazing how witnessing that greatness affected me in a positive way, too.
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So, it was some some heavy things that affected me and some beautiful things that affected me.
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Yeah, and it's your it's your power that you were able to notice both yes and convert them and transfer them into building a positive life.
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And we were talking about dreams earlier and I know a lot of this audience got dreams, right?
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This audience has dreams.
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And often I find yeah, give it up for your dreams.
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You got to I know there's dreams.
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I know there's dreams and sometimes it can feel like you know, you're holding that dream back.
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You're not living it fully. You're hiding it.
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You're kind of embarrassed about it.
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Maybe you're guilty about it.
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Maybe you're Maybe you don't believe in it in yourself.
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You said one of your early dreams you were telling me backstage and even now you were mentioning was actually to be a basketball player.
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How how serious were you about that dream compared to what then became music, what then became acting?
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Like, how serious was that dream?
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No, that dream was very serious.
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I mean, I I was dedicating my time and energy, a lot of it, to just playing ball.
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Like, that was one of the most important things to me and and my dream was the the Magic Johnsons, the Isiah Thomases, the the Michael Jordans, um all these great players that I actually got to be, like I said, in the presence of.
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It was like it made it even that much more attainable to me. I worked on it.
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I worked on it and I got pretty good.
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I mean, I I can't, you know, we we all as when you're a hooper or whatever, you feel like, "Oh, I'm cold. I I got game."
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But But in all reality, I probably wasn't pro but it's beautiful how divine and how great God orchestrates things for you to be where you should be when you trust in that.
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I got injured in in my sophomore year, and I was out for like months.
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In those months of me not being able to play ball led me to wanting to write more.
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Like I was already writing, but it was like, "Okay, I can't hoop right now, so I'm going to write."
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And when I came back to the team, I wasn't getting any playing time, so I was like, "Well, I'm going to go be a rapper then, man."
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And it just, you know, it kind of guided me to where I should be.
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Um, so my first dream was to hoop, and I kind of got to live out that dream in a movie called Just Right, where I played an NBA player.
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You know, I was like, "Wow, this is amazing."
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cuz if it was a fulfillment of a dream as an actor, it was my first leading role, but it also was like, "Oh, I'm actually getting to play like I'm an NBA player."
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I was playing against Dwyane Wade and Dwight Howard at the time, and that it was it was an amazing experience, and it's and it's something how we talked about this, how you know, you you have a dream, and that dream can evolve, and it could become you find a new dream, and and that dream can evolve.
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And I think, you know, I'm really keen on dreams because and I really try to try to like inspire young people to to have a dream, but even whatever age we are, but really I want young people to get that early because that was one of the most important things for me growing up that led me to say, "Hey, I'm not going to go too far over to this craziness."
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Like we in Chicago, you going to get into some craziness, right?
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You go you going to be around it.
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You going to you going to experience something.
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You might participate in it, But, because I had a dream, I would only participate but so much. I had a boundary. I had a boundary.
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And that truly was my guiding light like, "You know what? I want to be something. I want to do something."
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And even as those things begin to evolve, it still became a boundary for me to be like, "All right, y'all doing too much.
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I can't do that over there."
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The The thing I love about that and I want us to take away from this is sometimes your first dream doesn't work out.
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And I think for a lot of us when our first dream doesn't work out, we think it's dream over. Yeah. Like game over. It's That's it.
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Now we can't live any part of our dream and you know, I was saying my first dream, real dream was to become a monk.
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That's what I thought I was going to do for the rest of my life. >> Yeah.
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And I did it for 3 years and when it ended, I felt like I'd failed.
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Like I felt like it was over and I felt, "How am I ever going to spread what I've learned?
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And how am I ever going to live a life that's dedicated to spirituality?
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Like will that ever happen again?"
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And it's incredible the plan, as you've been saying, that God has for you.
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And I was sharing this earlier with a couple of people.
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I was saying that God's imagination is far better than my imagination. >> Yes. Right? But >> Yes.
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There's a scripture in the Bible that says his thoughts are greater than your thoughts.
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You know, that's that's very important for us to to understand because sometimes in that dream, you like, "I want it. I want it. I want it.
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God, this I mean, cuz I have that" I still have it to this day. I want this role. I want this role. And it doesn't happen.
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And now I've grown to understand that God's dreams and his thoughts are greater than my thoughts.
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So, for whatever reason it is, I'm not supposed to be in that particular film.
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I'm not supposed to be with that particular relationship.
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I'm not supposed to have that particular job.
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I'm not supposed to have that house that I really knew I wanted.
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Uh it's hard to grab on to it at times, but the more and more, you know, we practice it and and speak it and know it and trust in our heavenly father, in the creator of the heavens and earth, and know that that plan is is a master plan, and all we have to do is listen and be in tune and get the lessons from it, too.
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Life becomes more beautiful, and I can look at those moments where I haven't gotten a role, and that that doesn't mean that I don't feel like, "Damn, man, I really wanted to be working.
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I was excited about this script.
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I wanted I'm I'm not going to fake and act like I didn't."
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But I can say, "Okay, creator, I know you got something greater for me, something out there, and I'm going to do whatever I need to do to be present and also be obedient and surrender to what the higher plan is." Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
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Yeah, I I I saw something the other day that really resonated with me.
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My my friend sent it to me, and it said something like, "When things don't go your way, it's God and the universe saying, 'Not now, not this.
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I've got something better.'" >> Yes. >> Right?
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And it's that understanding of just being able to have that trust in the moment. I want to ask you that.
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How have you learned to build that trust in the moment?
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Like you said, we're both human. We're not perfect. You feel that pain. I feel that.
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I want to achieve things.
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I'm trying to build things.
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I'm trying to create things, and I'm the same. I feel pain.
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I'm not going to sit here and lie and say, "Oh, I just trust everything, and you know, I'm beyond that." No, that's not true. Like I feel upset.
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You're like, "Oh gosh, I worked so hard for this. I put in so much effort. We did everything. What happened?"
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When you've done it enough times, you get a better relationship, but how have you learned in the moment to deal with that emotion and to learn how to trust?
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It's been a process and and as I said, like you know, it's a practice.
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I was thinking earlier today about how we always talk about bad habits, but I've started thinking about good habits.
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For me, one of my good habits was has been to use um the scriptures that I that I read and and and stay consistent and diligent in my prayers and my meditations.
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Staying consistent with the way I love myself and treat myself.
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And that kind of helps me build the armor and the and the strength to be like when I have some of the most difficult pains.
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One of my greatest lessons and times that I've grown as a human being has been in one of the greatest pains I had and that was a a breakup.
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A heartbreak where I was like broken.
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And I hadn't been broken like that.
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I had lost people in my life.
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And that was definitely devastating.
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But it was something about a heartbreak where the person it was obviously you hear they're still alive.
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This was the first love that I had as an adult and I knew God had ordained it.
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But it's at a certain point it became not healthy.
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And when we were parting, it was hard. It was really hard.
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And it wasn't like I made the decision.
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I got broke up with, you know.
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And it was like ooh, this is hard and at times I wasn't wasn't eating like consistently.
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I was sitting in this hotel room for weeks.
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Just trying to find a peace.
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Calling my aunt, talking to different people about it. It was weighing on me.
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And I remember just starting to read certain books like The Mastery of Love and and Return to Love and these a lot of love books y'all, you know.
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And uh and uh but each time and each thing I read, I would get something out of it.
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Not even I wouldn't even have to read the whole book, but I would get something out of it.
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And I started thinking and practicing some of the things that I was reading.
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As much as I was still trying to hold on and got and be like, "Yo God, I know you said this is this is the relationship.
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I thought this was the relationship."
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Well, I learned some lessons in that.
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One of the lessons was that I was willing to dim my light for others.
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And in that relationship, I was dimming my light.
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It wasn't It's not that person's fault.
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I take responsibility for that.
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And I was dimming my light, but I was doing that not only in that relationship, I would do it when I would get around other artists that were more known than me, people that were like more celebrated than me.
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I would just dim my light.
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For whatever, somebody might not even It might not even be about popularity, money, or anything.
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I would dim my light if someone else just had something that I felt was greater than me.
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Well, I started to learn to love myself more and that's became a practice and it became saying beautiful things to myself and repeating those scriptures and and like starting to do things for myself that like fed into who I am and the things that I love.
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And Jay, about being present, that that really taught me to be present because at a certain point I had to realize, yeah, that was something that a relationship that was in divine order for me.
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And we had gotten the lessons out of that relationship and I got the pain that would that would send me to a whole new height and would turn me into a light that I never knew I had.
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And that's when it was done at that point.
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But it's hard sometimes to understand that it's done.
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But once you realize that God ordained the relationship and he also ordained the progress from it and and the moving forward from it, then I was able to move forward and be more present in my life and take that understanding of man, I can believe in myself.
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I grew up in a in a environment where my mother is very strong and and like wise woman.
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Almost everyone I was around, you couldn't really like be too confident.
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Or my mother would let you know, "Oh, you think you cocky or you think you're doing this?
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You think you're doing this?"
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But it's you got to find a balance in that.
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And I didn't have the balance.
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I would always dim my light. Yeah.
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And and eventually I was like I have to declare and claim and know within myself and speak towards my greatness, towards the things that I envision for myself and the things that I know I am, I have to say it.
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I have to believe it and I have to not be afraid to wear my greatness in front of anyone.
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Yeah, I had to learn that.
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This is going to be a surprise for everyone.
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I wanted to check if there was a a poet, a rapper, a spoken word artist in the audience that wanted 60 seconds to share with the audience and with Common their skills. >> Oh.
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I remember getting the music.
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I was going to my father's memorial. I was overwhelmed.
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I ended up writing that song and that song became the song that we ended up winning a uh Golden Globe, winning a Grammy and winning an Oscar award for.
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You either grow together or you grow apart. Yeah. >> But both are growing. Yes.
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And you often miss that when you feel like, "Oh, well, if we stayed together, then it worked. Then it was good for me. Yeah.
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But if it it wasn't good for me.
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As As I was listening to you, I was thinking about something that I always try to remind myself, especially when it comes to people going through breakups, is that you either grow together or you grow apart. Yeah. >> But both are growing. Yes. Right?
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We think if we grow together, we're growing. Yeah.
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>> But you also say you grow apart. >> Yes.
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>> But there's still growth >> Still growth. >> in that journey. Yeah.
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And you often miss that when you feel like Well, if we stayed together, then it worked. Then it was good for me. Yeah.
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>> But if it ended, it wasn't good for me. Yeah.
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And and I wanted to ask you about, you know, these themes.
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I just I don't want to take it for granted.
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The themes you're talking about.
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You're talking about heartbreak.
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You're known to talk talk about therapy.
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You're talking about the trauma you've been through.
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You know, we have your beautiful book here, And Then We Rise, a guide to loving and taking care of self.
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These are not themes that you Right. Give it up. Yeah.
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These are not themes These are not themes that hip-hop's known for.
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To have you sitting here and you talk about this balance of your mom and being too cocky. It's like that.
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Like hip-hop has that bravado, that, you know, that, uh, feeling of It's not really about humility.
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It's more about ego and being present.
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And then here you are with all these awards and all this achievement, but then you're talking about trauma and therapy and heartbreak. >> Yeah.
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That can't have been easy to start talking about it on day one in that space. I can't imagine.
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It wasn't, but I will say I did start with a with a greater advantage.
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And my advantage was I had a group of friends that allowed me to be me.
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And allowed me to be unique.
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Allowed me to be different. And they embraced me.
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They would talk, you know, they're going to talk their junk about me and like joke on my crochet pants or crochet hats and, you know, whatever like obscure things I was into.
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But it still was love and it still was like we we are supporting you.
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And that that kind of helped me to go out in the world and not be as afraid to be myself.
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So, the actual like thought of being myself wasn't as difficult as it was seen.
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You What what was the question though? The >> No, no, no, no.
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You all said That's not honesty again.
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>> this junie is this junie is good.
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I do want to know what the question My my mind went to to talking about that.
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But for a second, I wanted to know cuz I also had another thought about when you asked the question.
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But this junie, I want to say, man, I really Yo, this junie, man, I'm digging this, bro, for real. Cheers. Cheers. >> Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers, brethren. Is that right?
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Um my question was how does someone who's in hip-hop, which is known for being bragadocious >> That's what it is.
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>> and egotistic, have the comfortability >> what it is. That's what it is.
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So, I was on my third album. And I was doing a show.
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And after the show, this guy came up to me.
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And he was like, "Common, your music, this song you did, it's called Retrospect for Life and it was about abortion and I was telling my own experience and story.
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It started off as a poem and it eventually was a song.
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And he and he said, "The song you did, Retrospect for Life, made me and my wife decide to have our child."
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Uh and I was And I'm not saying that this I'm I'm saying that because that was a moment where it was like, "What?
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Like, this music and me telling my story can affect you in that way?
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Like I All I was doing was telling my truth.
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And I would and I was doing it unapologetic.
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And I just had to do it from my heart because hip-hop was the way I was expressing myself in the best way that I could and in the freest way that I could and the most honest way and sincere.
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So, for this gentleman to tell me that his child is alive because of this song, it made me know that I had a higher purpose with the music and with what I was doing.
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And the and that that allowed me as a hip-hop artist, as a black man, cuz ultimately when we saying like, "Yo, you coming from hip-hop."
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Hip-hop has been the like the garden for black and Latino black and brown people to express ourselves and then it brought everyone into the garden, which is a beautiful thing.
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But, it was a it was a garden that started with with our expression.
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So, when we saying like, "Coming from hip-hop, expressing yourself in this way."
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It's really saying being a black kid, expressing yourself in this way, how did you do that?
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I felt so good that I knew that I could move my people through the music that I was like, "I have to keep expressing myself in this way."
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And it was those songs like love songs that ended up being things that people responded to from me.
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People wanted to hear them bars and all that, but I had a a gentleman come to me earlier before show and be like, "Hey Common, would you be okay if um in the middle of your song The Light, which is about a woman and woman being a light, um in the middle of your song, would you stop so I could propose to my to my girlfriend?"
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And I said, "Yes, of course."
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And uh and you know, to have to know that I'm writing songs about from my heart and spirit and my experiences and they become those things for people led me to understand that I have to be as vulnerable, as goofy, as like free, reflective, as like just open, like non-perfect.
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I don't know of a better word that I can say. You You're a wordsmith. All right.
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But, you know, I got to be that.
29:10
Anything else is is misguided people, or is not being true to to who I am as an artist, is not being true to my purpose, and I'm not doing my duty to the most high God.
29:21
Jay, if there's anything that I can tell you that that drives me, is I every day and I know you talked about every day, and I want to put into practice some of those things you said we should do every day. I'm I'm so into that.
29:33
The exposure and all that. I thank you for that.
29:36
One of the things that that gets me is I want to please the most high.
29:38
I want to stay in my purpose and please the most high. Yeah. Yeah.
29:42
I mean, that's There's nothing better than that. >> Yeah.
29:48
There's not There's no greater accountability.
29:49
There's no greater source of inspiration.
29:52
There's no greater channel and Yeah.
29:54
There isn't apart from that.
29:57
And as I'm listening to you, one of the things that really resonated with me was what you said about the friends.
30:05
Because to have friends that, you know, in England we call it banter, right?
30:09
People you can banter with.
30:09
Like someone who can like poke fun at you, but then at the same time has your back. Yeah.
30:16
And having someone that if you can do that with them, that means you're closer to them.
30:19
So, when we first moved to the States, or maybe more LA, when me and my wife would banter with each other, cuz she's from Britain, too, >> Yeah.
30:27
everyone just think we're like we're going to break up or something.
30:30
Cuz we can like really lay into each other.
30:33
But But that's part of our love language, cuz the more I can do that with you, the deeper we know each other. >> Yes.
30:37
Cuz as we grow up, you lose some friends that you grew up with.
30:40
Maybe people move cities.
30:42
They get married to someone else.
30:44
They move into a different part of the world.
30:48
Maybe you've been here your whole life.
30:49
You had the same friends, but you kind of outgrown them now. Right.
30:50
How do you as an adult continue to build new friendships that look like your future and not like your past? That's beautiful.
30:59
You said people was like, "Mhm, right."
31:02
What do y'all say about that?
31:04
No, um Man, you know, at a certain point like once I started to like, okay, understand who I am and and I'm still learning, you know, like we hopefully we always will learn till we leave this planet on the physical level.
31:21
So, I'm still learning, but I do know a lot of things about me and I know myself and I think one of the things that has helped me to understand about attracting new friends and who belongs in in this atmosphere is people's energy, being discerning about people's intentions, making sure that any friendships, relationships, even moments, you want to be able to give and you want to be able to receive, too. You start by giving.
31:54
You know, most of the time I'm If I see somebody, I'mma greet them. How you doing?
31:58
And hopefully they'll greet back. Boom, love.
32:00
And it's like It might just be that moment or it may be more than that, but the point is you understand what energy you want in your life and who deserves to be in your life and you also have to be accountable for being a good friend, partner, a homie in their lives and like one of my closest friends is backstage with me.
32:28
Even though we talk about tell the same stories over and over again like, you know, I'll be like, "Damn, we still But we still have We still tell them same jokes about each other.
32:40
But we also share scriptures.
32:43
We also share motivation.
32:46
He'll send me things that motivate.
32:47
We also talk about life and just being in pain, going through these things.
32:52
And for me, that's a friendship that evolves.
32:55
Some people when you say you you said a very good point.
32:59
Sometimes you outgrow other people, but a great beautiful friendship and relationship you all grow as individuals.
33:05
And even if you ain't at not at the same place at the same time always, you might get there.
33:10
And I think for me, just understanding when I'm around people like, how do I feel around this person?
33:18
And how how do how do this person make me feel?
33:21
And hopefully I'm making them feel great.
33:23
Then that's the type of energy I want to be around.
33:25
And is this something that's going to be consistent?
33:28
We we doing this quick movie together and we we can hang out at this time, but this is not going to go further than in that as a friendship.
33:36
That happens sometimes, but that's okay.
33:39
That person is great for your life at that moment.
33:41
And you all can give each other equal yoke.
33:43
But ultimately, it's about to me just being around energy that you know is there to better you.
33:53
Iron sharpens iron and you you bring that into your life. Well said. Well said.
34:00
I feel like when I'm vibrating at my highest energy it's really clear whether someone wants to match it or not. >> Yeah.
34:07
Whereas if I walk into a space and I go at my lowest frequency I don't actually know where someone stands.
34:14
So it's almost like being at your highest vibration or frequency actually allows you to see what energy someone's at and whether they're willing to match and you're going to match them. >> Is that new friends?
34:24
Cuz I don't have a whole lot of new friends, to be honest.
34:30
You know, but I do have new people in my life that I work with that I love that I'll be there for, but I'm like, you know, friends, not just people you like, I'm cool with them.
34:39
I'm talking about friends.
34:40
How do you decide who can who you let into your life, especially with you being having such a big widespread platform and so many people probably wanting to be in that space.
34:51
How do you make decisions on who I'm pretty lucky, I think, cuz cuz my lane is so clear.
34:58
The only people who want to get closer, people who want to be spiritual. Yeah.
35:02
And so it kind of makes it easy because they know that I'm not really interested in other stuff.
35:07
So it's kind of like the people that do want to get close, they're all people that want to evolve, that want to grow, you know, it's people like yourselves who want to become more healed, which I love because my lane is so clear.
35:20
And that's what I mean by when we're vibrating at a frequency that I'm not always at a high frequency, but if our frequency is clear, yes, then it's clear to others whether we're going to be a good time or not.
35:31
So to some people I'm the most boring person on the planet because they know I'm not into the three things that they love, but that's why I think it's so good to be clear about who we are and broadcast that.
35:42
I don't mean necessarily publicly, I mean, when you walk into a room, whatever word you say, the question you first ask, the way you answer a question can completely shift the direction of a conversation.
35:57
Like when I walk into a room, I want to get into one deep conversation with someone in the corner.
36:03
I'm not the person who's like milling around trying to say hello to everyone.
36:06
There's nothing wrong with that. That's just not me.
36:08
And so I'd much rather walk away from an event having had a deep, powerful, profound conversation and made one new friend than feel like I spoke to 30 people about small talk.
36:20
And again, there's nothing wrong with that. It's just who I am.
36:24
So I love some of the things you just said because I love great conversations.
36:29
I feel like that's one of the ways I learn so much about myself is through conversating with people who who just have some emotional insight intelligence.
36:39
That's one of my favorite things, man.
36:41
No matter where I am I and you know, my friends be like, boy, you talk a lot.
36:47
You know, I I don't know.
36:49
But but but I do love those conversations.
36:51
And another thing you mentioned it that I have to say has been one of the most powerful aspects about helping me in my life is to be clear.
37:02
Like taking care of myself when it comes to like the foods I eat, like having a like I said my own meditation and prayer.
37:10
What does that look like?
37:10
Walk us through some of those habits cuz I feel like this group loves learning about habits and practices and tools and tactics.
37:18
What are What are some of yours that you commit to?
37:20
Wake up in the morning thanking God for the day.
37:24
Thanking God just for the day, for the breath of life.
37:28
And as Jay said, this is a spiritual thing.
37:32
I'm not like when I talk about God I I'm talking about the creator of the heavens and earth that exist in all women, men, that exist in all people on the planet.
37:39
It's not a religious thing.
37:42
It's This is about the spirit that created all of us and that exist in all of us.
37:48
So, just communion with God is the first thing and then I get into it's certain scriptures that I read that reinforce who I am and my relationship with the creator.
38:02
And then I get into um my prayer.
38:07
And then I'll get into my meditation.
38:10
People ask me like, do you do this type of meditation, this type?
38:12
My meditation is a Southside meditation.
38:17
I came I just came up with I pulled from everything that I had experienced and was like, this works for me.
38:22
It's not going to be this 20-minute meditation.
38:26
Might be a minute or two, but I'm going to get it in and and it works.
38:28
And it works for me, but seriously, it is it's that meditation.
38:33
And then I go to this other book that I have that has these mantras and and scriptures to them.
38:37
At that point, you know, like I'm prepared for the day.
38:42
And going into that day knowing that, man, this is going to be a beautiful day cuz we all Sometimes I wake up like uh something feel funny.
38:52
This like as soon as I wake up.
38:52
But me getting into gratitude and just saying thank you for the day and thank you for the breath of life starts to shift that funny feeling.
39:02
And then like me starting to starting to to say the things that I know I'm created for and the purpose that I'm here for, it starts to shift and my day becomes greater just from there.
39:14
And even if some incidents happen, my perspective on the day is is not down because I've done those things.
39:22
Now, the diet and food side, I get into my I got my supplements that I take and, you know, take those in the morning and then I try to get a workout in.
39:31
Like I said, sometimes you don't have hour to do a workout.
39:33
If you can get whatever time and it's just movement.
39:37
What I noticed is when I move around, whether it's a walk I used to think I was like, man, those old people be walking, man.
39:45
You know, but now I'm taking walks and I walking in London, walking in the parks and I'm like, am I that age that I'm walking?
39:54
But but a walk is a beautiful thing and I realized just the movement of the body is good for the mind and the soul.
40:01
So, this is all part of my like wholeness when I when I talk about in the book and then we rise is is that wholeness of like cuz I had certain aspects like I was always pretty much a spiritual guy.
40:17
Like just and learning my spirituality, you know, reading from the Bible at one point, reading in the Quran, and reading different things to just know God for myself.
40:29
But then I needed other aspects.
40:29
And I started to to figure out that the diet made me see clearer.
40:34
Not only did I see clearer like I was rapping clearer.
40:38
Like my voice sounded clearer. Like for real.
40:40
Like for not having certain foods in my body and taking care and and my energy I was waking up with energy instead like so I felt the difference and that was all the research I needed to do.
40:53
I didn't need to read nothing to know that like, oh, I feel better doing these things.
40:57
So all those things are things that I put into practice and you know, I pick up new things like just listening to you.
41:03
I'm like, wait, I'm going to start figuring out this exposure. Bless you.
41:07
I'm going to I'm figure out this exposure thing like and and and see what I can do cuz I'm always looking to learn and grow. Yeah, I love that.
41:16
Talking about exposure therapy I wanted this event to be special and this is going to be a surprise for everyone.
41:25
I wanted to give someone in the room.
41:27
We've been talking about dreams.
41:29
We've been talking about rising above judgment.
41:30
We've been talking about taking your opportunity.
41:33
I wanted to check and there's no pressure but I wanted to check if there was a a poet, a rapper, a spoken word artist in the audience that wanted 60 seconds to share with the audience and with common their skills.
41:48
I want to give you a moment and I don't want you to steal a moment from someone else.
41:52
So this isn't messing around.
41:52
It's It's someone who truly has I see the yellow shirt. I see one up there. I love that hustle. They hustle. They hustle. The hustle. I love it. What's his name? Oh, you don't know? Oh, wow. Okay. That's amazing. That's great.
42:10
You know, I really feel like there's moments like this. We got you in the seat. >> Yes.
42:17
Uh to give someone a moment, to give someone an opportunity.
42:21
To put someone out there, to put someone on.
42:22
I chose the hardest person to get downstairs.
42:24
Now he's lost trying to find his way.
42:26
While we're waiting for him, I want to want Oh, here we go. Want to come through?
42:35
Want to say hello before? Respect my brother. Bless you. Bless you. Bless you. Bless you. Bless you. Thank you, brother. Bless you. Thank you. >> All right. So, your name is? Daniel.
42:50
Daniel, where are you from? I'm from Chicago. From Chicago? Yeah. I love it. I'm from Korea.
42:56
You're rapper, spoken word artist, poet? I'm a poet.
42:59
In In all honesty, I've taken kind of a backseat from the spotlight.
43:03
I don't have any socials.
43:03
I go and perform at open mics occasionally.
43:10
But yeah, my heart is pumping. I love it.
43:15
Well, this is This is what we wanted to do tonight because you running down it We saw you hustle.
43:20
So, you take a breath just to catch your breath.
43:24
But that was the point of tonight.
43:24
I want to make it known that you can do it.
43:27
It's not a you know, I think we often feel like we have to wait for our moment. We got to work for it.
43:31
But we want to give it to people right here.
43:33
So, I want to give you 60 seconds to share with us the words, the work, whatever you want to read to us.
43:39
Come and we'll give us a zero out of 10 rating. No. Uh you good, Dennis? You ready? Yeah, you got it, bro. You got it, bro. You got it. You got it.
43:54
Um Okay, so I'm I'm going to give you something that's relatively new and it's about the lady that pushed me to come up here. She's She's up there. Uh-huh.
44:07
Real quick cuz I don't want to waste any of your time.
44:10
>> You're not wasting anyone's time. God, I'm nervous. Why am I up here? Um Yes. >> Yeah.
44:21
It's called my new favorite color.
44:21
If I asked any of you what's your favorite color, it would come without a second guess.
44:28
You might even attribute some colors to different moods.
44:30
Green might be the envy in a mean girl whose burn book with burning looks through sky blue retinas like our heavenly sibling.
44:38
Riling with the beauty of God's creations, but not a single star burns brighter than the patron my eyes behold.
44:44
After all, they say that's where her beauty lies. So, my answer is red.
44:50
That's my favorite color.
44:52
It's something about the way it massages her cheeks before they form that rose that reminds me of Aretha's declaration.
44:58
A dedication to the strongest flower in concrete jungles never meant to grow, but defying all odds. God's peculiar creation.
45:07
Sending sensations where you hear, see, and touch vibrations.
45:09
I love to make her blush just to see a smile from those red lips.
45:15
I'd re-educate the inner child in me that was deceived to believe that synesthesia couldn't be achieved, but who knew the color red could taste so sweet.
45:22
Scent like strawberries harvested solely by God's worthy.
45:25
I'll happily trick for this treat.
45:27
And I'mma leave it there cuz I am dying. All right. Yo, Jay. Jay. Jay. Let me I'mma rhyme. I'mma rhyme it.
45:41
Yo, that was that was dope. Real dope. Yo.
45:44
I know it's kind of hard to handle, but everybody give it up for Daniel. Yo, I say it like this.
45:51
I say it like this in God we trust.
45:54
I see your shirt and I tell MCs they not like us. What can you do?
45:59
Yo, you know the whole outcome.
45:59
I see Martin and of course I see Malcolm.
46:05
We know right now I keep my mind heavy.
46:08
I keep it already when I'm with Jay Shetty.
46:10
It's like this calm sense. Yo, I guess you know me.
46:13
I got to say rest in peace to that brother Kobe. This is how it is. Yo, we at your service.
46:17
We right here in Chicago and this is about purpose. It's on purpose.
46:22
Yo, I'm telling you these words is my man Jay.
46:27
Yo, I told you he's a wordsmith. Calm sense I'm coming.
46:30
I got my brother from London. This is how it be.
46:32
I got a hundred styles and running.
46:34
I can let you know my mind's like a encyclopedia.
46:38
When I come to the Chicago theater letting you know it's time for me to climb.
46:43
We talk about the spirituality. It's divine.
46:46
And I'm coming straight for Sha off the head.
46:48
My man Daniel said his favorite color is red.
46:51
Yo, I read through books. So, this how we look.
46:54
We got to understand calm sense I never been shook.
46:58
I've been hanging in the places where we hang outside.
47:00
I'm talking about the West and of course the South side.
47:04
And that's how it be when I know the goal off.
47:07
And shout out to my people that's even from the north. Calm sense. It's like this.
47:11
Yo, I guess I'm living it.
47:14
I was cruising up and down the street called Michigan Avenue grabbing new things that I need to do. Calm sense.
47:20
Yo, I told you I believe in you.
47:23
And believe in me as I'm receiving these things.
47:25
Earlier we was talking Jay about dreams. And that's how it be. The style of be free.
47:31
I just got to say RESPECT TO G. O. D.
47:44
GIVE IT UP FOR DANIEL EVERYONE. YEAH. YEAH. YEAH.
47:46
That was That was a surprise FOR ME. OH. WOW. WOW. WOW. WOW. >> Oh yeah. Oh yeah. Oh yeah. Oh yeah.
48:02
That was I was not expecting that.
48:06
I love I love rapping, man. I love I love MCing.
48:09
And once once we had the music a little bit and Daniel did his thing, I'm like I'm at home. I'm on the J's.
48:16
I'm on the J's head, you know?
48:16
I'm like I got I want to MC, so >> You just blessed us all.
48:21
I mean, that was straight off the dome.
48:23
It was all the references, the What up T-shirt reference. It's amazing. Uh Keep it free, right?
48:30
>> It's um Oh my god, thank you.
48:32
Thank you so much for that. And thank you, Daniel.
48:33
Give it up for Daniel again, everyone. You took your moment.
48:41
Uh I love I love people taking their moment. >> Yes.
48:46
>> And I love helping people have their moment.
48:48
And when those two things come together, because I feel like I spent my whole life waiting for someone to give me a shot. Yeah.
48:56
And often we can feel that way.
48:57
We're just waiting for someone to open a door or just let us in or whatever it may be.
49:03
And you know, oh, there we go.
49:07
He just made it upstairs.
49:15
And it's just beautiful when you put yourself out there like that.
49:18
yourself out there like that. And I hope that you know, one of the things I like to do differently in these evenings is have moments like that, because when you see someone who's sitting in the same place as you
49:30
are, but takes their moment, I hope it's a reminder to you tomorrow when you're out the office, when you're talking to someone, when you're with your family and you've just been avoiding that moment, I hope it gives you the courage and the strength to go Daniel did that. You know, on stage
49:43
You know, on stage in front of 2,000 people with Common and Yo, Jay, I got to say like you made me think about like it was a point where I I had to learn to take that moment.
49:55
And this happened to me this is further into my career.
49:58
I'm This is basically I was in a movie called Selma, right?
50:05
And and I was an actor in Selma, yeah.
50:08
And I'm directed by the great Ava DuVernay and I mean it's incredible actors in there and actresses.
50:12
But anyway, it was about the people of the civil rights movement.
50:15
And we finished the movie and the movie it really moved my spirit because we were living in the shoes and in the skin of the people of the civil rights movement.
50:28
So we got to meet Ambassador Andrew Young and and John Lewis, the late great John Lewis and it affected my life.
50:36
I remember Ambassador Andrew Young at our first meeting said, "What are you willing to die for? Live for that."
50:42
He said, "We were willing to die for freedom and justice and equality, so we live for it every day." Right?
50:52
Well, that all that affected me.
50:57
We finished the movie and I'm asking everybody that's a part of it, "What are y'all going to do for the like songs?
51:02
Like what's going What's Y'all got any music in mind?"
51:06
They was like, "Yeah, we got something in mind, but it's not you, right?"
51:13
So I usually wouldn't seize the moment or take that moment and like I would be shy moment.
51:20
That's what I was talking about dimming my light at times.
51:23
I was on the phone talking to my manager saying, "What are they doing with the song for for Selma?"
51:30
And he was like, "Man, they said they they got some people they want to use, but they they haven't locked it in."
51:35
It hit me like it was like the creator speaking to me. God was speaking to me.
51:40
I literally said, "I'm going to call you back."
51:44
The thought came to me like I'm going to call John Legend and see if he would be open to like working with me on a song for this.
51:51
I hang up the phone with my manager and call John.
51:55
John is in London and I tell him, "Hey man, I'm part of this movie Selma. It's incredible. Man, like it's about Dr.
52:04
King and the women and men of the Civil Rights Movement. Let's do a song.
52:08
Now, they don't want a song from us, so we're submitting it, but will you do the song?"
52:14
He said, "I got you, brother."
52:14
I usually wouldn't ask like my friends and and I and I have worked with John before, but I wasn't the type to just ask for it, but something I listened to what God said, "Look, call John."
52:25
I did it and John said, "I'mma be over here for a few months on this tour, but I will go in the studio on Wednesday." I hung up the phone.
52:35
I texted him three titles.
52:39
The last title I texted him was Glory.
52:42
He said he saw that that that name Glory and it sparked his thoughts and he started coming with the melody and he started, you know, coming up with the words for the hook.
52:54
One day when the glory's I can't sing it, y'all.
52:56
I'll mess it up, but but, you know, he did that, sent it back to me after that Wednesday.
53:04
I remember getting the music.
53:04
I was going to my father's memorial. I heard that music. I was overwhelmed.
53:09
I ended up writing that song and that song became the song that we ended up winning a uh Golden Globe, winning a Grammy, and winning an Oscar award for.
53:27
And I'm bringing that up because it was that moment it was a that one moment where I decided to listen and not be afraid and just ask and seize the moment and it happened.
53:43
Yeah, that was That was it.
53:45
>> I'm so glad you shared that story. Yeah.
53:48
I'm so glad you shared that story because I think, you know, that was later in your career. >> Yes.
53:53
And you still have that doubt where you have to listen in.
53:59
And I think I love hearing that because I think we all think one day we're going to get to a place from which we don't have to listen anymore. Right.
54:05
To God, to that inner voice, to that direction, but the truth is it's always the case.
54:11
You always have to go inward Yes.
54:15
>> to find that outward direction.
54:15
It's not going to happen by constantly looking around at where do I want to be and where do I want to go, and you've got to constantly look inside and hear the ask, hear the calling. Yes. >> Hear that question. Yes. Right?
54:27
Because we're looking for the answer that you don't hear the ask. Yes, man. >> You know what I mean? Yes, man. Yes.
54:34
>> It's a really interesting thing, like God's trying to ask you to do something.
54:36
You're like, "God, tell me the answer."
54:37
>> Right, tell me the answer.
54:38
>> like, "No, no, no, I want you to do the Right, I want you to do this, and you have to be open to the to the experience and the journey, too.
54:44
It's a beautiful thing, but it's a thing where it doesn't stop.
54:49
Like, I mean, last week I was like, "Man, I want this. I want this."
54:52
It didn't happen for me, and I had to like really come to grips and do exactly what I told you all I I work on. I work on.
55:01
Like, just still staying in gratitude, still knowing what's for me is is there for me, and really being present in Okay, I I prayed for that, and I said, "Man, if it's in your will," and I used my scriptures to and that didn't happen for me, then I have to understand that I'm supposed to be here, wherever you have me, and I'm going to be trusting in that and be present in that.
55:22
And that's one of the things that I just It doesn't stop.
55:27
Like, I was late in my career when I did that with John, when I said, "Hey, you know, I called him, but it's still moments where I'm like, "Should I say this to this person? Should I not?
55:37
But I'm more leaning towards because I've I've worked on it to to say I'mma speak up for the things that I want or just say my truth.
55:45
Like if it's something that doesn't work for me, I I know how to speak up on that, too. So I love that.
55:53
I want to take the last few moments to end every On Purpose interview as we always do with the final five. Yes.
55:58
These questions have to be answered with one word to one sentence maximum. Okay.
56:06
So come and these are your final >> This is a real challenge for me. >> real challenge.
56:12
These are your final five.
56:12
Question number one, which we ask to every guest who's ever been on the show, what is the best advice you've ever heard or received?
56:20
To love others as you love yourself.
56:24
Um I think that's the best Yeah, the best that I've received. I agree.
56:29
Question number Oh, yeah, give it up. Absolutely. Go for it. This is awesome.
56:33
Uh question Usually when I'm doing the final five with someone like I don't get this. So this is amazing.
56:38
Like you don't know what a gift you're giving me by being here right now, you know?
56:41
When we're doing this in the studio, it's beautiful, but we should do every episode with you guys here. It's Yeah, you know?
56:49
It's uh >> Uh question number two, what is the worst advice you've ever heard or received?
56:55
Um people say this They say the same every day.
56:59
I I ask them like how you doing and they say, "Man, same new day."
57:05
I don't subscribe to that mentality, so I looked at that as like bad advice and I'm like, "Nah."
57:12
So it's got to be something new happening today. Create something new. So Create something new. Yeah. Yeah.
57:19
>> Uh question number three, what was the hardest part about learning to love yourself and take care of yourself?
57:28
Which is the tagline of >> The hardest part about learning to love myself and take care of myself is learning to love myself when I'm being rejected.
57:37
That is like a real That's a because that is when it taps into the little Rashid and the things that I've been rejected or abandoned from before um as a kid and when I'm rejected now you told me to keep this answer short, but It's a great answer. Carry on. It's a great answer. Carry on.
58:04
But when I'm rejected now, sometimes I'm I can bring that little Rashid into the present and know and know those feelings of being rejected and make this new rejection greater than what it really is.
58:16
I'm not present in what is happening.
58:19
So, I think loving myself in those moments is been some of the toughest times, but I feel I'm worth it, so I I strive for it. Great. Question number four.
58:37
How do you show yourself self-love every day?
58:40
The things that I do for self-love that I spoke about from every aspect, the prayer, meditation, foods.
58:48
I make sure I'm diligent about it and like if my call time is at 5:30 if they coming to get me to go to set at 5:30, I'm still going to get up and make sure I have enough time to do those things because that's me loving myself.
59:02
That's me giving the time to myself that I need.
59:07
And that's That has nothing to do with nobody else, but that's me and the creator.
59:12
And I And I think, you know, that's how I take time and and I also have boundaries now, too.
59:16
Like where sometimes if somebody is I know is taking advantage of me um or just asking for too much and I'm not able or willing to give that, I know how to speak up for that.
59:30
So, that's another way that I've learned to love myself every day. Is speak up. Beautiful. Yeah.
59:39
Uh fifth and final question of the final five.
59:41
We ask this every guest who's ever been on the show.
59:44
If you could create one law that everyone in the world had to follow, what would it be?
59:48
We would have to go inside of ourselves to find the greatest love that exists.
59:58
And in every daily activity, we would have to acknowledge that love in ourselves and encourage it in others and see it in others.
1:00:10
And that would be the law.
1:00:10
To know that love within you and acknowledge it in others and treat them as such.
1:00:17
Common, we wanted to I mean, beautiful answers.
1:00:19
We wanted to do one last special thing with you because you kindly came out to Chicago to be here with us.
1:00:26
Uh I want you to take a look uh behind you in a second when we have it up there. If we get it up. There we go.
1:00:35
What What If you could communicate with your younger self now, what would you say to your younger self?
1:00:44
Well, you had hair then, brother.
1:00:47
Uh uh uh Well, I would say I would say Man, I would say, man, no matter what you go through, you got everything you need to to be what you purpose to be on this planet.
1:00:59
And go out there and do your duty and do it in the highest way and do it with joy.
1:01:07
Do it with love, do it with grace.
1:01:09
And you will make some mistakes, you will go through pain, but God loves you more than anything. You love you.
1:01:15
So, show the world that love. I love that.
1:01:22
And And second one, what do you What do you need to hear? Oh, looking very dapper.
1:01:30
It's like you know, it's like uh What would you say you need to hear most right now?
1:01:37
The quest is still going.
1:01:38
You still got a lot of growing to do, a lot more to give, um be free. You're doing well.
1:01:48
But But But you you you're going to be greater and you will do greater and all those things you envisioning, continue to be patient and be diligent and remember your purpose.
1:02:02
And Jay'll have you back on again. Anytime. Anytime. Anytime. Anytime.
1:02:12
Uh Off Off to this next one, I'll see if you want to come back on again.
1:02:15
This is If we get a third one out It's some AI AI from the team.
1:02:23
When you look at that What What wisdom do you What wisdom do you hope you will have realized Well, >> in the next 10, 20 years?
1:02:33
You finally stop putting that dye in your beard. Uh-huh.
1:02:39
I would hope that I was still um be enjoying like music, creating music, enjoying acting.
1:02:50
Um I would hope to be getting my Morgan Freeman on at that point, you know?
1:02:55
Uh I and I would hope that the work that I have have done is penetrating um people's lives and families and things are just better in the world because of me doing my part as we all do our part.
1:03:08
And I hope that I'm just having fun and in a good healthy relationship. Beautiful. Come on, everyone. Come back anytime. >> Thank you. Thank you.
1:03:20
If this is the year that you're trying to get creative, you're trying to build more, I need you to listen to this episode with Rick Rubin on how to break into your most creative self, how to use unconventional methods that lead to success, and the secret to genuinely loving what you do.
1:03:38
If you're trying to find your passion and your lane, Rick Rubin's episode is the one for you.
1:03:42
Just because I like it, that doesn't give it any value.
1:03:44
Like, as an artist, if you like it, that's all of the value.
1:03:48
That's the success comes when you say, "I like this enough for other people to see it."