0:00
So, I haven't seen any of these questions.
Search this video
0:01
So, um it started out from a tweet where someone said like, "Here's 10 questions to get to know people." Is that Is that right?
0:06
Yeah, listener of the pod and I think your friend Blake, Blake Burge, I think is his name.
0:10
Uh he had tweeted out a thing like, you know, whatever.
0:15
There are many questions, but few will change your life.
0:17
Here's 10 questions that will change your life.
0:18
And yeah, the thread goes viral.
0:20
So, you know, normally it's kind of like viral. No, it's good.
0:24
There's this thing, Ben, you'll have to look it up. Again, no research here.
0:27
There's this thing I remember years ago it was called like the New York Times like 21 questions.
0:33
And it was like here ask these 21 questions on a first date. right?
0:37
Well, on a first date I thought.
0:37
And it was like, "Here's how you get intimate with people."
0:41
And like as a single 21-year-old I read that I was like, "Oh, like here's how I can hook up with girls."
0:46
And I remembered those questions and they're very similar to what these guys' questions are.
0:50
But it was like, "When did your father make you cry?"
0:52
Or like like it was like pretty deep questions like that.
0:56
Um and so I'm I'm down with these questions.
1:07
So So, I actually read these questions and I was like, "These are actually good questions."
1:09
But um the way he presented it, I think you know, no offense, this is how most people do Twitter.
1:15
It's like, "Here's some general advice or some general questions."
1:20
What's interesting to me is not the like the question, but it's kind of seeing somebody struggle with their their answer to that question.
1:25
So, for example, um he would ask a question like, "And I'll give you give you the first question which is which is going to come out here in a second."
1:32
So, Ben, read read question number one and I'll explain how he tweeted it and how I think we should answer it instead. Read question one.
1:38
Question one is, "In what areas of my life am I settling?"
1:41
Okay, so what areas my life am I settling?
1:43
That's a powerful question.
1:45
It's a good thought-provoking question.
1:46
Now, his the rest of his tweet was like, you know, just enough or just okay is not good enough.
1:50
Identify the areas of your life you're you're just settling.
1:54
So, to me that's the part where it was like, "No, no, no, Blake, I want to hear your answer." Like, you tell me.
1:59
Like, if you're going to put out one of these bullshit-ass threads that's like, you know, generic generic generic thread um to try to get likes, I think that the next level of this like [ __ ] thread thing is people going to get a little more vulnerable.
2:11
They're going to put their actual answers in the thread rather than general advice.
2:16
Who's invented this this theme I'm seeing?
2:18
So, like, Upworthy was like, "Here's 10 things, you're not going to believe number seven."
2:21
This new one that I'm seeing on Twitter is there's 8,000 of this thing, here's the four best.
2:28
8 billion humans on this earth, not all of them are worth following.
2:30
Here's my 11 friends that are worth following. Who Who created that?
2:33
Did one of our buddies make that or is it I have no idea who started that, but that's the formula that That is the formula.
2:40
Well, Ben, all right, what's the first one? I just tried it.
2:44
It's uh in what area of my life am I settling? You go first.
2:49
Okay, so what areas of my life am I settling?
2:53
And by the way, this is called the boys go to therapy cuz we got to open up a little bit.
2:56
We got to we got to see what the what this what the answer might be.
2:59
I would say two come to mind. The first is fitness.
3:03
Like, I think I got kind of comfortable with my workout routine and diet and I was like, "Oh, okay, like, I'm not as fat as I was.
3:14
I'm on my way to getting fit."
3:14
And I just kind of got okay with like I was kind of settling for like, "Wow, you're much better than before."
3:23
But I've been like riding that for for like, you know, 12 months now.
3:25
And now the before is the same as the current because it's like been a while.
3:28
Like, 6 months of like the same, and so I just realized this recently and was like, "Why did I settle here?
3:35
This isn't the destination."
3:37
Like, I basically was on a road trip and I stopped at the gas station and then unpacked my bags instead of being like, "No, no, no, this is not the destination.
3:44
This is the the pit stop.
3:46
I got to get to the hotel.
3:48
Why did I Why is my suitcase open?"
3:51
You made a lot of progress though in a relatively short amount of time.
3:52
You just got to keep going. Yeah.
3:55
So, I would say I'm settling there.
3:56
And the other one I'm settling, I think, is me and my wife, like, we have two little kids, and there's like, you know, this feeling of like, you know what?
4:04
Like, we put a lot into work.
4:06
Okay, then you put you're putting a lot into your fitness, you're putting a lot into your kids.
4:10
And it's like, oh, whatever's left over at the end of the day for each other, like, you know, we take what we can get as the scraps of like, you know, the energy the kind of like just the effort we put into kind of your relationship.
4:21
I said, I think we've both kind of settled on that, which is like, it's fine.
4:25
They're not They're not leaving.
4:28
They're not going anywhere. It's fine.
4:29
We can We can only see the kids grow up.
4:32
Is she going to listen to this?
4:33
No, that's the beauty of it.
4:35
You should have her listen to this.
4:35
I think that that's good that you you said that.
4:38
Maybe maybe that will make her like you more.
4:41
Yeah, especially because I didn't say that she is doing all this, right?
4:45
You said we are doing it, which is, you know, the key.
4:48
All right, what about you?
4:48
What areas of your life do you think you're settling?
4:52
Um uh my consistent diet needs to I I think I I could I like to improve that.
4:57
I looked at my goals over the last 10 years.
4:59
So, I created a goal tracking thing 10 years ago when I was about 21, and I hit all of them except for wanting to weigh 190 lb.
5:07
I've always struggled to lose 10 lb, and I just I've always wanted to do it, and I've never done it.
5:13
And so, I've I'm sucking at that.
5:13
The second thing, career-wise, I've settled a bit.
5:18
So, I'm I purposely set up a period where I was like, 1 year the sale and plus 1 year, I'm going to chill.
5:23
I'm just going to read, I'm going to learn, and I still I'm not ready to like go all in on something. I'm I'm not there yet.
5:31
And so, I'm kind of being a little bit lazy, and I feel a little guilt around that.
5:34
And then, I'll do a relationship one.
5:38
Dude, I'm super dependent on Sarah.
5:40
Like, uh if someone like wants me to come speak somewhere, I'll be like, "Sarah, can you just like handle this?"
5:45
Or like, "Do you want me to go speak here?" Like, let me know.
5:46
Like, I'm only going to And And often times, cuz I don't like to fly, I'll be like, "Uh by the way, I'm only going if you're available.
5:51
Like, if you don't go, I don't want to go."
5:53
Because I enjoy being around her, and I think uh I should learn to do a few things by myself a little bit more than I have been lately.
6:01
I just tend to rely on her so freaking much that I need to I need to go do stuff by myself.
6:07
Give me one that's Give me one that's uh a settle that you I I feel like all those settles, maybe that both of us said, are like settles that we're kind of cool with.
6:16
What's a settle you're not cool with? The weight thing.
6:19
Yeah, I the weight thing, I'm not cool with that.
6:20
It Like, I get up Like, I'm pissed off.
6:22
I'm like, "Why can't I just be consistent?"
6:24
If I was just consistent for like 5 months with in in eat a certain amount of calories, I'd be good. I'm I I would be good. I would hit it.
6:32
But, it is so freaking tempting, and I just give in to that [ __ ] and that pisses me off. Um What else? I don't know.
6:40
What am I I do think that So, tell me, Dave, is this is a settling thing?
6:46
I create I've created a couple little small prod- products in my free time, and I get so excited about making like $500, $100, $1,000 a day.
6:52
I get so much joy from that.
6:55
And I'm like, "Dude, I could crush this if I want to.
7:00
I can build I can build things that are huge.
7:02
Why am I not Why don't I have the motivation to do this?"
7:05
And so, I feel like I feel soft and like I'm settling in that aspect.
7:11
Yeah, I think one uh one that I've seen in myself And by the way, I don't think that that was uh Forget what you said.
7:18
You said, "Tell me what you think about this." Like, I agree with you.
7:20
So, so I think that was good.
7:21
Um I'm thinking more and more that the the the settling thing The easiest way for me to pinpoint where I'm settling is when I see the contrast when I see somebody who's not settled in this area and I'm like, "Oh, hm.
7:39
They've Wow, they're really pushing it beyond beyond where I am right now in this.
7:43
Like, and it doesn't mean I'm always going to just chase and do what others do necessarily, but it kind of takes me seeing that for me to be like, "Oh, word?"
7:52
Like, that's This isn't uh This isn't the kind of the spot to just settle down and and and dig my heels in.
7:58
And so, that's happened to me with money.
8:00
Like, for example, I've seen people's lifestyle or I've seen people's Just people talking about stuff.
8:05
It's like, somebody will be like um "Yeah, we, you know, we picked up this project and then we, you know, like a real estate deal.
8:11
We We picked up this this deal and we're going to flip it, you know, basically 4 months later.
8:17
And, you know, we should make 1 and 1/2 million on that."
8:18
And I'm I'm just sort of like, "Oh, okay."
8:20
So, like, their normal, where they have settled for their normal is like what would have been, let's say, an outstanding outcome for me.
8:27
But, like, to them that's the normal course of business.
8:31
And then I just sort of check myself and I say, "All right, do I care?"
8:32
And usually I Usually I do care.
8:35
You Usually I do care when I notice those things cuz that's why they stood out to me in the first place.
8:40
And like, sometimes they don't stand out in this way that I'm saying, where I'm saying it all calmly.
8:46
I'm just sort of like Usually it's like I'm jealous of them or I'm like um I find myself trying to come up with a reason why that's not good.
8:52
And then I got to hold my I got to pull myself back like, "Oh, or maybe instead of coming up with reasons why that's not good, I should just admit that it's probably good and something that I actually want for myself and I'm just trying to kind of like mentally, in my own justification, tear their [ __ ] down a little bit to make myself feel okay.
9:07
But in reality, maybe I should just say, "Oh, cool.
9:10
They showed me something I want."
9:11
Um and maybe I've I've I've actually just kind of settled here, but I could go further than I have than I currently have. Do Do you journal?
9:18
Do you have a history of journaling?
9:21
Or goal setting at least?
9:21
Just like writing down like thoughts or targets that you want to achieve for different ages?
9:29
Not ages, uh but like do you like kind of have ideas in mind, but it's not based It's not based on how old I am.
9:34
Like, I I I've done this before.
9:36
No, I don't mean like in the future.
9:38
What I mean is like when you're 21, were you like, all right, this year I want to accomplish this? When I was 21, I did.
9:43
I said, okay, by 30, I I used to say by 30 I want to have a million dollars in the bank and I had a couple of goofy ones.
9:50
It's like a million dollars in the bank, I want to have gone on Survivor and I want to like, you know, I had like two others.
9:58
Like I don't remember what they were at this point.
9:59
And then like as I got older, I was like, oh, well, that number needs to be bigger and then the second one, time isn't really a factor and like, oh, I don't care about Forbes 30 under 30.
10:07
That's actually all [ __ ] and like, you know, I kind of adjusted my like goals once I like wasn't 21 anymore.
10:13
Well, I think it's good to look at those things cuz I I'll look at all my old journaling and writings and I'm like, what what energy was I putting into there? What was I bummed about?
10:19
What was I excited about?
10:21
And then often times I do one of two things.
10:23
I either try to impress my past self or try to make my future self pumped where I'm like, what what what will I be really excited that I did now um in 10 years?
10:35
So there's this thing, I don't know if you've heard of it.
10:36
So Chris Sacca who is uh you know, one of the kind of best investors of all time.
10:40
He was one of the biggest investors in Twitter and Instagram and couple other badass companies.
10:46
He um he had this thing which was like he he read out somewhere.
10:51
I think it was like on the Tim Ferriss podcast something.
10:52
He like he read out a note that he had written to himself.
10:58
Um and a note that he'd written written to himself when he was 20 years old.
11:01
And um and he goes, I I actually I just found it while we were talking here. So this is perfect. I found the transcript.
11:08
Have you Do Do you know what I'm talking about?
11:10
Do you know what I'm about to say?
11:12
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I remember it. I remember it. What did he say?
11:13
I don't remember exactly what he said, but I remember this episode.
11:17
He goes, he goes something about, you know, what do you want to be when you grow up?
11:19
He goes, so here I am, I'm 20 years old.
11:21
I'm living in Cork, Ireland and we'd start the day drinking at 11:30, blah blah blah and I never heard of an investment banker.
11:27
I've never heard At that point I had never heard of a venture capitalist.
11:29
And so I just wrote in there, I don't know what the job is called, but I know it's going to involve a lot of talking on the phone, a lot of negotiating, a lot of yelling at people, high risk, high reward, unbelievably high stakes, and I'm going to do it part-time from the mountains, part-time from the beach.
11:43
Whatever it does Whatever it is, I'm going to be done with it before I'm 40."
11:49
And then he's like, you know, fast forward, he This is, you know, just I think he was 40, 41, and he basically So it's exactly that.
11:54
Yeah, so he's like He's now a billionaire who does exactly that, makes deals.
11:58
He didn't know what a VC was, but he became a VC, which is that deal.
12:01
He has a house in Truckee, and you know, another one on the beach, so he had the mountains and the beach thing, and it was like literally it all played out, and he retired from the game, and he was like done with it, and he moved on with his life, and he started doing other things.
12:13
And so um so I always thought that was really cool, and I thought it was cool because it wasn't like these [ __ ] lame goals.
12:19
It was a description of his life It was a It was like a painting of his life.
12:23
It was like a movie scene of his life.
12:25
And I've noticed that the people who kind of do this, like they kind of call their shot, and they manifest it, they don't really call their shot with like some like It doesn't feel like Excel. It feels like iMovie.
12:39
It's not like a bullet point analytical thing.
12:42
It's like a a vision for how their life is going to be, and what life is going to feel like, and they don't even know the words to describe it or the route to get there.
12:48
They're like, "But that's it.
12:50
That thing at the end, that's how it's going to feel.
12:52
That's what it's going to look like.
12:53
That's what it's going to sound like." I'm doing this tonight. I'm doing This is good. I iMovie, not Excel. That's a good one.
13:00
If you were going to do uh like let's do a kind of off-the-cuff shitty version, right?
13:05
Again, we do it for the entertainment.
13:06
Uh of We do it for the people.
13:09
What do you think would go into that?
13:11
What do you What's your ver- What comes to mind as your version of that?
13:15
Um I like physical places as opposed to internet places.
13:19
So I like I it would really I want to have a I really want to own I want to have some type of physical land or play or buildings throughout the country that I can entertain all of my friends all at one time and pay for all of it. something here? Yeah.
13:37
Can I propose we do a 2-minute thing where we just jot down on our note here what we think it is and we'll just cut that out. We'll just cut that out. I'm not prepared. You What's yours? got to do it. What's yours? what I'm saying.
13:49
Like we got to write it down. We got to figure it out.
13:50
Okay, so I I think I'm not ready. All right. Look at that reaction.
13:56
This tells you That's the That's what we call resistance when the boys go to therapy.
14:00
That's We identified some resistance.
14:03
I have to figure this out.
14:03
This is like such a hard thing to do. Next question, Ben.
14:08
[ __ ] All right, you guys ready for the next question?
14:10
Let me Okay, let me let me give you my Let me give you my scene right now. Okay.
14:13
My scene that I have in my head is You're already living in a mansion. No, dude.
14:18
My house is like this I already know the house. It's this big ass house.
14:22
Everything's [ __ ] white inside.
14:24
My I'm at this I have the same I have a chef like I have today, but it's like on this like giant area.
14:28
There's people just coming in and out of my house cuz we're like the [ __ ] lobby.
14:34
Like my whole life and work is so integrated that like my trainer's showing up.
14:38
They're having brunch with us and then the you know, I'm having this meeting with this other person, but they're also going to work out with us and the whole thing is just integrated into one big ass thing. My mom's over.
14:47
My sister's over cuz we all live nearby cuz we all made it.
14:48
The second thing is I take a nap midday because with no guilt.
14:53
So zero guilt midday nap.
14:53
I already know that that is like that is the That implies that the rest of the [ __ ] worked itself all out.
15:01
And then the last piece is all I get to do is just meet interesting people and be super curious about them and then I just either I don't know record or type or something like kind of like what we're doing right now.
15:15
I just take the interesting bits.
15:17
I put it out there and it's in million it's in in a million people's ears or eyes, you know, the next day because they are following it.
15:24
I They love the content like they love the content packages I put out.
15:27
And I never meet those people.
15:29
I don't have to talk to them.
15:30
I'm not their consultant.
15:30
I'm not their motivational speaker.
15:32
I just kind of I'm taking little bits of what I'm curious about and I'm putting it into a million people's ears every morning.
15:40
I think you're almost I think you're practically there.
15:42
I don't know you got to get the house and the fancier chef.
15:46
Dude, you can take a nap now. I'm sure.
15:48
Dude, the midday nap right now is that's indulgent.
15:50
If you take if you take a nap during the day that's like that's like giving the middle finger to your spouse.
15:56
I'm going to go take a nap right now.
15:59
What What's the next question, Ben?
16:01
way, that million people's ear thing that was old.
16:03
I had said that before we started this podcast.
16:05
I had told Sully he was like, "What do you want to do next?"
16:08
when I was selling the company and we were on like a [ __ ] 10-mile walk.
16:13
We just kept walking in the middle of the night and he was like, "Tell me more.
16:15
What do you What are you thinking?"
16:16
I said, "Dude, I think what I want to do is I just want to have some way that I can just get my thoughts out there and I'm it gets in a million people's I remember calling it ear balls.
16:24
I said it's in a million people's ear balls in the morning.
16:25
I said I just think that that would be so cool if I could just be in a million people's ears while they're on their commute to work or whatever else.
16:31
And that was before the podcast.
16:33
Now the podcast is getting close to that. Yeah, you have that. All right, question two.
16:38
And but you can go out of order, Ben.
16:39
Pick pick the questions that are interesting to you.
16:41
Um let's go with question 10.
16:41
You should choose your battles wisely.
16:44
What battles do I choose? Oof.
16:49
Dude, I choose so many petty battles.
16:51
Like if I when I'm driving and I see someone behind me and they're driving like an [ __ ] and cutting other people off, I like go out of my way to slow down and purposely like block it so I'm going just as fast as the fast lane so they can't get by me.
17:04
Um also I I reply I go to their destination. Yeah, dude. I'm really petty.
17:09
I'm just It pisses me off if someone's rude.
17:12
I also uh, reply to the just so many comments that I shouldn't reply to um, where I think someone has said something and it's just kind of ridiculous and I reply to it and there's no reason why I should be doing that.
17:24
So, I pick a lot of really, really, really dumb battles.
17:28
Your HOA battle that you had, I would die on that one.
17:32
That would That would not That That This would not stand. That's what I would say.
17:36
I mean, I would go hard on that one.
17:39
What was the question though?
17:39
What What battles do you pick that you shouldn't?
17:42
It Basically, it says, "Choose battles wisely.
17:43
What battle do I choose?"
17:43
So, which it really what it's saying what battle do you want to be choosing?
17:48
Another way of looking at it is what you said, which is what are the shitty What battles am I stupidly choosing right now that I need to not be choosing?
17:53
Dude, I choose so much small stuff.
17:56
Like, I just for some reason I stay like hardcore in the dirt.
17:58
Like, for example, I'm out at my ranch and I've got people here like setting up my Airbnb and stuff and like people are like doing the stuff, but like I just have to be here and I'm like putting [ __ ] together or like, "Fuck it.
18:09
I just I'm going to rent a car and go to Costco."
18:11
It's like, "No, we're already doing that."
18:13
I choose the smallest stuff as opposed to leveraging my my skill set.
18:16
And so, that is an unwise battle that I should not be picking.
18:21
Instead, I need to be thinking about much bigger things and I just I simply don't.
18:25
I think having kids might change that.
18:26
I think there's a world where that where I'm praying that having a child is going to like somehow like show me the way.
18:35
Uh, you guys could tell me if I'm wrong, but dude, I pick the smallest I focus on tiny, tiny, tiny issues.
18:41
That's like I have a friend who the like the They're a couple and they're like kind of going through problems right now as a as a relationship and then she said something.
18:49
She was like, "I just feel like I need to have a kid and then that's going to like help us."
18:53
And I was like, "Oh my god."
18:56
No, that is not the answer.
18:58
Like, I understand why you think that that will make this relationship better, but it is going to do the exact opposite.
19:05
I think it could be the answer, to be honest.
19:07
Having a dog is like 2% of having a child, not in the sense of I'm taking care of it, but it's like I've got something that I need to protect and take care of, and it makes me a little bit happier.
19:15
I imagine properly having a human being where you're like, oh, I have to dedicate my my life to this person.
19:21
It's beyond me at this point.
19:21
I have a feeling that is that can be very inspiring.
19:25
And that's why I think a lot of like 35- and 40-year-olds who are childless and are like getting messed up on psychedelics all the time and feel depressed, I'm like, dude, just [ __ ] pop out some babies.
19:34
I bet like you won't be asking yourself, how do I find myself?
19:37
You're going to say, how do I just like make this kid happy?
19:38
And like when you dedicate yourself to others, I think you're happier.
19:43
Uh can I read you something cool, by the way, uh that I just with that?
19:48
Um no, I think you're right in that in two ways.
19:49
So, I think you're right that having a kid definitely takes the focus off yourself.
19:53
So, that that eliminates like a huge number of worries that you have, but it replaces them with new worries.
19:57
If your habit is to worry, guess what?
20:00
Whatever situation I put you in, you're going to find something to worry about.
20:04
better to worry about other people, though.
20:05
It's it's more rewarding to It is an improvement.
20:08
The other thing is that yeah, some [ __ ] just gets thrown out the window cuz you don't have that bandwidth.
20:12
You don't really have that extra time to think about stuff and do stuff and make that trip to Costco cuz it's just off the table. You don't have the time.
20:18
And so so that's one thing, but it it doesn't fundamentally change the nature of the problem there, the root cause of the problem.
20:23
Um which would be, you know, like a focus on minor things. Cuz guess what?
20:26
Then you're going to start to focus on, you know, why your kids, you know, pinky toe is a little bit crooked and why they have this little rash on their knee and like why they're not eat why they didn't eat all, you know, a balanced lunch and like there's a million there's a zillion things you could worry about with a kid, and you can even justify them further cuz it you're all I'm a martyr, I'm a great parent for doing so.
20:45
So, you got to be careful with that.
20:47
I don't think it goes away, but I do think it like changes the problem a little bit. So, what's yours?
20:52
Um Okay, I'll answer the question.
20:54
I'm going to read you this thing.
20:55
So, the battles um the battles I should pick I should pick The battles I want to choose are um health.
21:07
So, being in the best health that I can be and having a a healthy lifestyle for me and the people around me. Is your wife healthy? Does she eat healthy?
21:16
Yeah, she she she's in and out.
21:18
She She can be when she's on it, she's super clean.
21:19
She She doesn't have the problem I have of discipline.
21:22
Like once she flips the switch, she'll just never eat bad again until she flips the switch off.
21:28
Uh and then she'll eat Oreos all day.
21:30
And so it's like, you know, one or the other.
21:33
Um and so you But and same thing with working out.
21:35
She's like hardcore intense about that and hardcore intense about her diet.
21:38
Um and like she doesn't waver at all.
21:41
So, uh but it's just a matter of what what mood she's in.
21:45
Um like and the mood is like a year-long mood, not like a daily daily fluctuation.
21:50
So, I think health is the first one cuz I've seen that once your health goes a little sideways, nothing else actually matter None of the other battles have like any relevance anymore.
22:01
Uh I think the second one is like probably the probably the second battle to choose is like uh I don't know, probably something around parenting, but I don't even know how to phrase it.
22:14
Like I don't know, being like not constantly um trying to like rush through parenting parenting and like getting the job done.
22:23
Uh that's probably the second one is like the battle of en- enjoying being patient with my kids.
22:26
Uh and then the last one is probably like I do too many projects.
22:31
I have so many [ __ ] projects at once.
22:33
And they're all good projects, but they're probably collectively together a bad number of projects.
22:41
That's probably the worst one.
22:43
I know I always say it, but how many people criticize you about that?
22:47
Uh I don't know, my friends and people who actually care about me.
22:48
Like I don't know, like the people who know me and care about me do.
22:52
And the people who don't are like, "Oh, that's cool. You do so many things."
22:53
And my friends are like, "That's not cool.
22:58
All these things could be cool, but you you to do them.
23:00
You got to do them right.
23:01
And if you're not going to do them, you got to figure out how to like hire somebody who's going to do that thing for you.
23:05
Dude, I would if I was you, I would only do three things.
23:07
I would do the podcast cuz that's not that hard and it kind of drives the other thing.
23:10
I would do Milk Road and I would do investing.
23:15
Yeah, the problem is I'm too deep in on e-commerce and so I got to like either hire my way out or sell this thing or I don't know what.
23:21
I don't know what the other options are. sell it.
23:22
I think you sell it or something.
23:24
I think that what everyone talks about hiring someone to run [ __ ] they're still like involved somehow.
23:31
Like you're not actually I I think that that's actually really hard to do. know.
23:34
When you did it for the Hustle, you were pretty good about it, right?
23:36
Yeah, but I thought about it all.
23:36
I mean, I still felt like I was working there, but I yeah, I I didn't do other projects though.
23:43
Um I want to read something to you real quick.
23:44
There's a thing from Naval that's I don't know.
23:46
You said something that that reminded me of this.
23:49
It's a little I have a Slack channel called wisdom and this is in there.
23:50
So he goes uh he says, "The only true test of intelligence is if you get what you want out of life."
23:58
It's the only true test of intelligence.
24:00
If you're getting what you want out of life, he goes, "There's two parts to this.
24:02
One is, are you able to hack reality to get what you want?
24:04
And the more important one was, were you smart enough to figure out what you should want in the first place?"
24:11
Dude, that's the hard part. That's the hard part. Exactly.
24:12
And like, you know, you read this and you nod and then it's like have I been smart enough to figure this out in the first place? What do I even want?
24:21
And then do I do I like both you and I, we have developed the skills of hacking reality.
24:25
But we get a little loose on remembering what what we actually want and what doesn't matter, what we don't care about and like remembering which game to actually play.
24:34
Yeah, ben- bending reality is in my opinion the easy part.
24:36
What knowing what you want is the way way harder. I don't know.
24:41
But I don't know if that's a good idea.
24:43
other part one other part that I really liked.
24:45
He goes um you live in a society which has a bunch of people in it.
24:48
So they will train you to play the the bunch of people game, the multiplayer game.
24:53
But only an only as an individual do you get to stumble on the hidden game, the single player game.
24:56
And that is the real game.
24:58
And he goes He says a couple things.
25:00
He goes um He goes uh if you had no adversity, it would be a very boring game.
25:05
So, remember, you got to play the game, it's your game.
25:10
You get to design the board, design the challenge, you get to design the victory condition.
25:13
And that is the creativity, that is like, you know, the sort of you get to decide the purpose of your own life in in the same way you get to design what game you're going to play, what the rules are, and what the victory condition is. And if you haven't this?
25:27
intentionally done that, you're uh you know, you're not you're not playing it, you know, you you haven't actually started playing that game consciously yet. Where did he write that? know.
25:34
He He said this on like a Twitter Spaces or something like that.
25:36
This guy's Zach Zach Pogrub uh tweeted it out. I liked it. That's good.
25:42
Ben, what's another What's another one?
25:46
All right, I think this is an interesting one.
25:46
Um what are you letting in?
25:49
So, another words, like uh he says turn off the news, don't read the comments, quit interacting with negativity, think of it as mental fitness.
25:55
Like, what what things are you letting in, what noise are you letting in that you shouldn't let in? Oh, that you shouldn't? a Yeah.
26:03
What what are you letting through the through the window or the door that actually should you know, you shouldn't be shouldn't be getting through that What are yours?
26:10
Well, I had what you would written something on the doc that I think is interesting. It was about feedback.
26:13
So, let's just zoom it into feedback.
26:17
What was your question around feedback?
26:19
So, I have a few ways that I go about doing this, but you could do this when building a product or when um just asking people about your personality, which I think you should do.
26:28
Like, what do I what do I suck? What do I rock?
26:29
And what you'll notice, and it's very clear.
26:34
I tweeted out, "What do you like about the podcast?
26:35
What do you want more of?
26:36
What do you want less of?"
26:38
And for every person who says they want a longer podcast, there's an equal amount of people who say they want a shorter one.
26:43
There are some people who say more guests, there are some people who say no guest.
26:47
And that makes things really hard you to to to figure out feedback, and so I was going to ask you how do you decide which feedback to listen to and which to ignore?
26:59
So, I started off like Well, I used to the way I used to think about this was Dude, feedback is the key.
27:04
You need a feedback loop.
27:05
You need to talk to your customers.
27:07
You need to know your audience.
27:08
And there was all these like, you know, books written about how important that stuff is.
27:11
And so, I became [ __ ] Mr. Feedback.
27:13
I would, you know, if I had a project idea, I'm taking the designs out to a mall, and I'm stopping people and saying, "Hey, will you give me feedback on this idea?"
27:22
And, you know, every coworker I was like, "Hey, I would love some feedback.
27:25
What do you like about me?
27:25
What do you hate about me?
27:26
What's good about me to work with?" etc. I was [ __ ] Mr. Feedback.
27:30
And then I started to get what you what you just described, which is information whiplash.
27:34
Which is it's like information overload, but it's not just an overload.
27:38
It's contradictory information.
27:41
And so, then I'm like, "Oh, [ __ ] What to do?"
27:42
So, then I got paralyzed.
27:42
So, then I went to Steve Jobs mode. [ __ ] feedback.
27:45
People don't know what they want.
27:46
Why would I ask them what they want?
27:48
They don't They don't even know what they want for breakfast.
27:50
How can they tell me what they want out of this out of this app they've never heard of?
27:52
How can they tell me how to be a better boss? Blah blah blah.
27:55
People don't know what they want. And I became Mr.
27:57
Steve Jobs in the turtleneck.
28:00
Then I sort of realized, well, that's not good either, right?
28:01
Because now I've isolated myself from actually getting feedback.
28:04
So, I I've no signal to go off of.
28:08
And so, now I've come up with a better balance, I think, between the two.
28:12
Which is I seek out feedback from people who I think are are going to give me relevant feedback.
28:17
So, I don't just ask everybody.
28:20
And then the last piece is the feedback is not the answer. It's the question.
28:25
So, when I hear feedback, I'm not looking for the answer to what we should do more of, what we should do less of, how I can be better, how I can be worse.
28:33
I'm just looking for the feedback to just surface a couple of questions.
28:35
So, for example, if they if the feedback said, you know, longer podcast, some people would say, "Oh, I want longer podcast."
28:41
Some people would say, "I want shorter podcast."
28:44
It's just a question that comes up, which is what do I think is the right length of the podcast?
28:49
What podcasts are great when they're long?
28:51
What podcasts are great when they're short?
28:52
And what would be the what would be a great short version of a podcast?
28:55
So I use the feedback to ask myself a better question, and then it's my job to come to the answer.
29:00
It's their job to just give me their opinion, which which gives me a question that that can ask.
29:05
And so the same thing goes with products, which is when I ask for feedback we both like this book called The Mom Test, and the the central principle is I only get to ask them about their problems.
29:14
They don't I don't get to ask them what solution they want.
29:17
Um and so similarly, when I go ask for feedback now, I'm just looking for them to say things that's going to get me to ask a better question that will get me to to come up then it's my job to come up with the answer to that.
29:28
Uh so that's the main principle.
29:32
When when in doubt, there's one final thing, which is at the end of the day, I got to like trust myself, and I got to know that ultimately, if I just do the thing I think is right over and over and over again, I will happen to I I might some people might not like it, but I will ultimately attract the people who love what I do.
29:49
So that comes back to that that saying my my trainer gave me, which is who are my customers?
29:53
The people that love what I do.
29:55
And it became that simple for me.
29:55
So that that's when I that's what I fall back to.
29:58
So it's like it if it was like an if-else statement it's like if if their feedback gives me a clear question and an answer that I know what to do with, great, I'll make an adjustment.
30:07
But if not then I'm just going to do what I do, and I know that that will attract the type of person who loves what I do.
30:14
I think that I I think you can I always call it like Excel sheet your way to creating a big business.
30:21
So I think that like you could just say like where's the opportunity based off of like traffic demand, and I just hired these people, and you could create wealth that way.
30:30
I so I I and I and I don't like when people say you have to be passionate.
30:33
You don't really have to.
30:35
You can just Excel your way to this.
30:35
But what I've learned throughout the years is like it's a lot more fun just to do things that you think is are cool.
30:41
And typically I can that's more of the feedback that I'll listen to is just like, do I think this is cool?
30:47
And the second thing when I get feedback is I don't actually care, like you said, what they're saying.
30:56
I I care more about why they're saying it.
30:57
And so for example, when people say make the podcast shorter.
30:59
They're not saying make it shorter.
31:02
They're saying it's not always that interesting. And exactly.
31:05
And And so the because if something's, you know, really long, it doesn't matter.
31:10
As long as it's badass or if I did a made a 3-hour movie about Sean, your Sean's going to watch it.
31:14
And so it's really not about listening to the actual feedback, but why do I think they're saying it?
31:23
So that's what I listen to. All right.
31:26
This one you guys get to talk about some other people.
31:27
Um this one is, am I surrounding myself with the right people?
31:32
Who are the five I want to spend time with? Ooh. Powerful question.
31:38
That is a powerful question.
31:40
So let's just we'll make it I think it's a heavy question, so let's make it light.
31:43
So tell me right now, who are the five if you just said I spend my time the most with these five people, who are the five people you currently just spend the most time with? Wife, my wife Sarah.
31:54
Uh Naval Ravikant, my best friend and lives next next door to me.
31:58
Ramon, who you people know, Ramon Van Meer. And then um Jack Smith. That's four. You got one more?
32:05
I wouldn't put anyone else in those categories, no. That's it. Your dog?
32:08
Well, you know, I I like you guys kind of like I that's pretty in-depth.
32:11
But I would say that that's that I would end it there.
32:16
And all right, so then let's let's let's just add one more.
32:18
Who's somebody you wish was in that five that is that you're not spending as much time as as you like in an ideal world you would be. Uh Steph Smith.
32:26
I would add Steph Smith there. Oh. Yeah. Nice.
32:33
I think Steph Smith is is amazing. Just like what?
32:38
I was like just like our podcast listeners.
32:40
They also want more of Sam Smith, so.
32:42
every time I talk to her, I like damn, she's brilliant.
32:44
She's a very special person. Uh so maybe her.
32:49
Uh anyone else like uh I sometimes I do wish like I had like some baller baller baller friends.
32:54
A lot of my friends are like pretty great, but like [ __ ] hanging out with like a Russian oligarch just to see how like some of these crazy people think who are like extreme.
33:06
I would like I like extreme people.
33:06
So even though I may think they're a bad person, I would like to hang out with some of these extreme people who are just on extreme ends of success.
33:13
Or it could even be an athlete.
33:16
Like what's it like to hang out with like the person who holds the world record in the marathon.
33:20
So it would be nice to to be around more extreme people.
33:25
That's a good That's a really good actually twist to this, which is I think a lot of people have heard this idea of you are the average of the five people you spend the most time with, and that's true.
33:33
But there's two other groups of people that I think really matter.
33:35
One is like the equivalent of a bender.
33:38
It's like you don't want to go on a bender every day or every weekend, but like twice a year, a bender is a lot of fun.
33:45
And if you don't do a bender twice a year, if you're not really having a one amazing party or you know, just an all-nighter or some kind of experience that's like a little out there, you kind of relieving a little bit of life on the table.
33:55
And um and so there's some people that are amazing in that capacity that you just you would never want in your uh your everyday, but they're amazing twice a year uh twice a year hangs with.
34:07
Uh and I think there's some people that are like that.
34:11
The other one is who have you just not even encountered yet?
34:16
Like who's just outside of your bubble that it's like you don't even know what you don't know yet because you just don't hang out with anybody like that.
34:23
And so you you have zero exposure and therefore, you know, it's just like it's not part of your worldview, it's not part of your mental model yet.
34:29
So I think that's another like two categories.
34:33
Who are the five or the those those two two two new categories?
34:36
Do the five and then the other. All right.
34:38
So, my five would be Sonia, my wife, and my kids.
34:40
I'll just put it put it all together.
34:41
Um Uh my mom is the next one.
34:44
Uh so, I spend My mom comes over 1 week out of every month. She stays with us.
34:50
Um Uh Ben, who's kind of like my my right-hand man, my my business partner across Milk Road, across in the fund.
34:58
He helps with the podcast.
34:59
He does a bunch of things.
35:01
So, I talk to Ben hours a day.
35:04
Um Andre, who I I don't think you've met Andre, right? No. No.
35:09
Andre's like kind of like the new Ben. He's like the next Ben.
35:12
Um so, he's he's a new guy in the fold on on that level.
35:14
And Andre's kind of amazing because Andre's got this story um that he had some illness that he had something he caught some bug or got into some infection that like it gave him like kind of like chronic fatigue syndrome or something like that.
35:29
Like he basically like couldn't get out of bed for like, I don't know, like 2 years or something like that.
35:32
Like he he he was in a wheelchair or something.
35:33
And nobody nobody knew what it was, and it was just like and then he kind of like recovered from it, but it was like this multi-year thing.
35:40
And so, this [ __ ] is the most like grateful person you'll ever meet because he's like "Dude, I walked today."
35:47
And I'm like, you know, like it doesn't take much for Andre to be like high on life.
35:51
And because Andre's around me all the time, I'm I get that secondary high, that you know, the contact high off of Andre.
35:56
And like, you know, he cuz he he kind of like was just battling and got out of it.
36:01
And so, now he's like every day he like you could tell he's just savoring every day like as if you you haven't eaten in like 2 weeks and you're having your first meal. That's how Andre's like.
36:11
And so, I love that about Andre. Who are the other two?
36:16
Uh the other one is Sully, uh who's our mutual buddy.
36:20
Um and I don't hang out with him that much cuz he moved, but he's a partner in one of my businesses, and so I talked to him, you know, because of that.
36:28
But, the one downside is now that he's like an official business partner, we don't really just like talk to shoot the [ __ ] anymore.
36:34
It's like we kind of Anytime I'm talking to him, I'm sort of talking to him always as he's a as if he's my investor or business partner instead of just catching up, you know?
36:42
So, I guess that's probably the downside.
36:43
And then So, those are the Those are the five that I'm currently hanging out with the most.
36:49
I would put you next as we hang out, you know, 2 3 hours a week doing this.
36:52
So, that's more than most people.
36:54
And then, the one I wish I hung out with more was Ramon because Ramon is like the best human on Earth.
36:58
So, you know, the more Ramon in my life, the better human I would be just, you know, by default. I completely agree.
37:03
When he teaches me a lot.
37:06
He uh He's a very thoughtful person. I learn a lot from him.
37:10
And then the the category that I was saying that people I'd have no exposure to is like I basically have no exposure anymore to people that are in high school and college.
37:17
Which is like actually pretty important as an investor and like, you know, person of the world to know like what it It's like, "Oh, I forgot.
37:22
I used to think about these stupid things and they were the most important things in my life."
37:27
Or like, "Oh, wow, you know, we didn't have phones, so we couldn't do these things, you know, that they're doing now in high school or college."
37:34
So, I have like zero exposure to that.
37:37
Um you know, like people in third world countries like, you know, when I went down to Mexico, I was like, "Oh, wow, like I kind of forgot like you just how simple and like different life is for most people on Earth."
37:47
And like, you know, I used to live in Indonesia and China and stuff like that.
37:50
So, like I definitely was in it every day.
37:52
But, now, you know, I'm just sitting in the burbs in California, so it's easy to forget that.
37:56
So, I I I think I have a lot like my bubble is pretty tight right now.
37:59
And I think I should pop that intentionally once in a while.
38:03
Do you want to do one more question, Ben?
38:05
Yeah, we're doing five questions.
38:05
Five questions seems like a nice uh round number.
38:10
And you, Ben, you can remix it cuz some of these are sort of the same.
38:12
So, you could just ask a different question.
38:14
You're a good question asker in general.
38:16
So, you can ask a different question.
38:17
I've been thinking about uh one of these.
38:18
So, let's go with this one.
38:18
In what ways am I in my own way?
38:20
Uh I can say that one easy.
38:23
I lose my temper and follow my I get very emotional where I'm like, "No, [ __ ] this. This is wrong.
38:32
We have to do it this way."
38:34
Uh and I have lost a lot of money for doing that.
38:38
For like uh um let's just say like it's an employee who I think like has uh maybe underperformed.
38:46
Uh even though they talk like they are hot [ __ ] I would just fire them as opposed like, "Well, we could definitely salvage this."
38:56
Like there's lots of ways to salvage things and make things better and so it's a a net positive.
39:00
But more often than not be like, "Well, no, I just I'm out.
39:02
I don't want to deal with the headache. I'm over it."
39:05
Or and that is a very emotional decision.
39:07
I make so many emotional decisions.
39:09
Often times it's Sometimes it's ego. Often times it's temper.
39:13
Or but mostly if it's like, "Oh, I think this person is trying to get one over on me." Like [ __ ] them. I want to crush them.
39:19
No, I'm not doing You know what I mean? I get a ton Uh yes.
39:22
I make a ton of emotional decisions as opposed to practical decisions. That's interesting. Uh all right, I got two.
39:31
I have one that's real but But is that true?
39:33
Have you Have you seen that with me? Yeah, for sure.
39:36
You you've been mad at me sometimes and I'm like because you think I'm trying to like get one over on you and I'm like, "Dude, I'm I'm really not."
39:41
And then once you realize I'm not like your whole perspective changed right away and I was like, "Oh, that's what you thought? Like oh, I had no idea."
39:47
Cuz I wouldn't like it's so different than the way I think.
39:49
So I I didn't I just never I I couldn't understand it basically.
39:54
It's not like I was Like I We can give a real We can give a real example.
39:57
I got mad at you for being late and I'm like in my head I'm like, "He don't care.
40:01
He don't care about this. He thinks he's better."
40:02
And it was reality was like, "No, dude, my baby was sick."
40:06
Or like, you know, I like she was in the bath and it took forever to get her out.
40:11
And that's like a legitimately good excuse.
40:14
even a bad excuse which was just like, "Dude, I just I literally Like I was sitting here.
40:18
I just lost track of time. I'm not doing anything. I'm not more important. I'm not like a diva.
40:22
I'm not uh trying to do that.
40:24
Like I feel horrible every time I do.
40:25
Like I Sometimes I literally don't even have a good excuse."
40:30
Uh but but even that was fine with you.
40:31
It was just like as long as you don't know I was sort of like actively doing it, it didn't bother you. You know what I mean?
40:39
No, it it doesn't bother me.
40:39
Or another thing that I do all the time, and I think everyone should learn from me, and I'm working hard at it, and I made this mistake, is res- replying really quickly to text-based messages.
40:51
So, whether that's an email, uh anything where it's like, "Dude, it's okay if you sit on this for an hour, or even a day, or even 5 days."
41:00
Sometimes I'll get [ __ ] like a text or an email, and I'm like, "Oh, no, F that."
41:05
And I quickly reply, and I'm like, "Oh, I should have just sat on that for like 3 hours. What was I thinking?"
41:11
Yeah, I'm That's actually a great one.
41:13
That's a great answer for me, too.
41:13
I'm massively disorganized, um which affects everything.
41:17
So, it's like replying Like there are so many emails and text messages that like people are either like offering me something, they're trying to help me, and I'm just not replying, and people take it very personally.
41:30
Um as, you know, maybe I would, too, if I felt like I was getting blown off by this person.
41:34
Or I'll just miss a deal that like is just like a clear win for me, because I just don't reply or forget to reply. I don't I don't see it. I would say [ __ ] them.
41:43
You know, I actually don't think you should I I've been struggling with that, too.
41:47
I had And lately, I'm just like, "I'm just not going to feel bad about replying to these people."
41:51
Like And it This is This is the most douchy But listen, here's the most douchiest thing I could say, but just subtract this by like a lot, and that's the reality.
41:59
Imagine you're Justin Timberlake, and people like are always presenting you with stuff.
42:02
You're just like, "Dude, I don't care.
42:04
I'm going to do what I want to do."
42:05
Of course, we are not that big a deal, but like a much, much smaller version, where there's like lots of opportunities, and I'm just like, I'm just going to ignore all of them.
42:14
I don't expect JT to reply to a DM, do I?
42:18
Yeah, that's true, but uh I'm talking about like people who I'm doing business with or they're my friends or something like that.
42:23
Like those are people I do intend to be replying to, or I've asked them for something that they gave it to me and I forget to do something with it.
42:29
But what do you think, Joe? What do you think? there.
42:31
Like on my desk right now, there's a check. How much is that?
42:36
I I don't want to show the check on on screen, but this is a $13,000 check that's just been sitting here for like 6 months, and then it expired.
42:41
And so now I just have to go like get a new check, and then I got the This is the new check after the other one expired, and I still haven't deposited this one.
42:50
Another month has gone by.
42:51
Like that's how shitty I am, and it's just sitting here because I'm just disorganized for no reason.
42:56
Or the same thing with like my company's books.
42:57
So here's the bad way it plays out, which is I don't like I've never hired a bookkeeper, and so I'm like, oh yeah, like I don't know, like aren't the transactions just like on the credit card?
43:07
No, they've got to ask you.
43:07
They've got to ask you to year, I'll just I'll just cram for my taxes final and just figure this out.
43:14
And so now I'm like learning, oh, how do people do this?
43:17
Oh, they hire bookkeepers, and then they like Okay, got you.
43:21
So like there was just things that are just messy in my world that's me getting in my own way.
43:24
Um you know, it cost me a lot of money to to have messy books or not reply to certain certain emails.
43:32
Um so I think that's me getting in my own way.
43:34
The other one was just staying up late, which is again, this is so boring cliche, I'm almost embarrassed to even say it on the podcast cuz How late do you stay up?
43:42
Nobody gives a [ __ ] Like on average, I was staying up till 2:00 or 3:00 in the morning, and then I'd wake up at 9:00.
43:48
And I just started like the last week, I was just like, [ __ ] it, I'm just going to sleep early.
43:51
And it solved like five of my biggest problems.
43:53
It's like my diet cleaned up cuz I no longer late-night snack or eat like junk, which is all I would do, right?
44:00
If I had dinner at 7:00, and now it's 1:00 a. m.
44:04
and I'm hungry, like guess what?
44:04
I'm not eating broccoli and chicken that time.
44:08
Nothing good happens after midnight.
44:08
It could be It could be eating or it could be fighting. Yeah, exactly.
44:13
It's like my sleep was shitty, my work was shitty.
44:15
I was editing the Milk Road at night.
44:17
Now I just I sleep at like 10:30 or 11:00.
44:18
I wake up at 6:30 or 7:00 in the morning.
44:22
I write the Milk Road and it's or edit the Milk Road and it's done.
44:24
But and like by the time the kids wake up like I've already like finished my work day almost.
44:29
And so I just cleaned that up and it cleaned up like five other things.
44:34
But again, so [ __ ] cliche to say sleeping early that I bleep this whole thing out.
44:38
Make it mysterious instead.
44:41
Do you remember how Rob Dyrdek was about tracking his time and like waking up at 6:00 a. m. or 5:00 a. m. or whatever he did?
44:47
I actually like like I if that's what makes him happy, do it.
44:54
And I also respect how crazy he is about that.
44:56
I think I like extreme people.
44:59
Part of me was like, "Ugh, but that's like you don't need to do that."
45:00
But then the other part is like that would be kind of cool to do for like two or three weeks just to see what would happen.
45:06
Just what would happen if you do get up at 6:00 a. m.
45:08
and you are like you have a very strict schedule.
45:10
I actually do think that that sounds kind of fun to try it once in a while.
45:15
What time do you sleep and wake up typically?
45:18
Last night I couldn't go to bed.
45:18
I went to bed at 1:00 or 2:00 and I got out of bed at 7:00.
45:22
I you normally always get out of bed at 7:00.
45:26
So you're super regimented with your schedule?
45:28
I'm not productive though usually.
45:28
I'm not productive until about 9:00 or 10:00.
45:33
My yeah, so my baby wakes up at 6:00 in the morning usually, so that's when I'm up.
45:37
And I try and go to bed around like 10:00, 10:30 and then once or twice a month I'll go to bed at like 3:00 a. m.
45:44
cuz I need to get something done.
45:47
That's why you go to bed at 3:00 a. m.?
45:47
I I You're not like going out and doing [ __ ] Wait, do you do you drink?
45:52
Do you drink or do drugs? No.
45:55
What It's usually like I God, this is the lamest trio ever.
45:58
When I when I do How to Take Over the world episodes, I usually do a bunch of it in one sitting that I'll do from like 9:00 p. m. to like 3:00 or 4:00 a. m.
46:07
I'll do that twice a month.
46:10
Sean, do you So, let me recap these five questions so we can answer.
46:13
Uh I drink if like the occasion calls for it, but not with any regularity, no. But, do you get drunk? I I used to, but no.
46:18
Like last 5 years, I have not been getting drunk. And do you do any drugs? No. God, that's crazy.
46:25
What a bunch of prudes we are.
46:27
drink green smoothies, bro.
46:27
I I I don't even drink coffee. We are so lame. All right, go ahead.
46:32
All right, I'm going to recap the five questions.
46:33
So, the five questions were, in what areas of my life am I settling right now?
46:39
The next one was, um Am I surround Oh, no, this is not it. Oh, yeah.
46:45
Choose your battles wisely.
46:45
What battles am I choosing right now?
46:48
And what like what do I want to choose?
46:50
So, what areas of my life am I settling?
46:53
Choose your battles wisely.
46:53
What battles do you want to choose?
46:54
Number three, what am I letting in that I need to shut out?
46:58
That's noise and information and opinions from the outside world.
47:02
And then, am I surrounding myself with the right people?
47:04
Who are the five people I want to spend the most time with?
47:07
And what was the fifth one? Did we do five?
47:09
Yeah, question five was, in what ways am I in my own way? Oh, yeah.
47:12
In what ways am I in my own way?
47:13
What are the things you're doing that gets in your own way? Um Those are the five.
47:17
Ben, which one of those questions, when we said them, did you go off on a tangent thinking for yourself what your answer is? Which one shook you?
47:25
One of these questions should shake you.
47:27
I I I The first question shook me.
47:27
In what areas of my life am I settling?
47:31
That Okay, so okay, you guys are looking at me.
47:33
I I thought I thought maybe I'd get away with not actually giving you the answer cuz like that's like that's one that penetrates to your soul, but you both were just like, you're going to answer right now.
47:40
And like for you both of you talked about like health and fitness stuff, and one area in which I settle a lot in my life is like I get super concerned about environmental pollutants, especially like plastics and microplastics and like stuff like that.
47:59
And I always feel like a psychopath when I talk about it cuz everyone else is like what what like plastics?
48:05
And I feel crazy cuz I'm like, "No, actually like this isn't a conspiracy theory.
48:10
Like the research is out there that like all these microplastics are like crashing our testosterone levels and like disrupting our endocrine systems and stuff.
48:19
Like I'm not crazy, but the fact that everyone else is like, "Whatever."
48:23
makes me feel even crazier.
48:23
And so a lot of times That's a weird obsession.
48:27
like settle I compromise and I'm like look at my baby like putting this plastic toy in her mouth and like a part of me dies and I'm just like uh whatever. I I settle.
48:36
I'm not going to fight this fight right now.
48:38
But it is something that like Do you have plastic Tupperware?
48:41
Uh we have plastic Tupperware that I wish we would just like throw away. So just do it.
48:46
Dude, that is not at all where I thought you were going with that answer when you first said it cuz you were like so it was like weighing so heavy on your heart and that's what it was.
48:53
It matters a lot to me, Sean.
48:55
That was a [ __ ] random answer.
48:57
Are is is is is rubber is like a like a what they call like a binky what a pacifier thing? The pacifier.
49:03
What what is that rubber I don't even know what that is. Is that plastic? Uh yeah.
49:07
So most of the time no, they won't do plastic in pacifiers.
49:09
So they'll either do silicone which is better or they'll do rubber.
49:15
Yeah, which is also better.
49:15
And rubber is okay, right?
49:17
Silicone I like have my doubts about but it does not have like the same proven track record of disrupting your endocrine systems the way plastics do.
49:29
Do you do reuse water bottles? No.
49:32
In fact, I try not to use disposable water bottles because a lot of times they leach.
49:37
What do I go watch or read that's going to scare the [ __ ] out of me about There is a Joe Rogan episode that I'll link up in the show notes where he talks with she's a the Harvard researcher who does a bunch of this stuff and she's really good.
49:51
And it will it will scare you a lot.
49:54
Yeah, dude, plastic's pretty bad.
49:54
Like you don't know that, Sean?
49:57
You might You microwave plastic, don't you? only on this podcast.
50:02
Yeah, I I microwave everything and I everything's in plastic in my house.
50:05
So, I'm like, "Oh, [ __ ] Okay."
50:08
Um So, I've heard this, but I've like never I've never got shook yet where I'm like, "Oh, take action in this."
50:15
Um But that's what That's why I ask.
50:18
What do I need to go watch that's going to like trigger me where I'm going to need to I need to be like I I will go and, you know, make a like dramatic change in my house?
50:27
I'll I'll link it up, but like the short of it is basically like our testosterone levels are decreasing at 1% per year.
50:34
Fertility levels are just like crashing, and it's not just people who want to have children less, like people who are trying to have children are able to have them at much lower rates than in the past to the point where it's like and our plastic use is increasing so much that they're like in 50 years we're not sure that anyone is going to be able to have uh unassisted uh children anymore.
50:55
But how do they know plastics cause that, versus just Uh cuz they do studies of with rats, and um they're able to demonstrate it the the correlation. Good answer.
51:07
That was a very good answer.
51:09
And um what do you what's what's an example of something you swap out that's like a big culprit for plastic?
51:14
Like most people are doing this, but if you swap this, that solves like, you know, 20% of that. Glass, right?
51:20
Well, so the biggest thing that she said was never heat plastic.
51:25
That is like if you can do one thing, it's never heat up plastic.
51:27
So, like if you have a water bottle uh with water in it, like yes, that will leach some plastic into your system, it's not great, but if you leave it out in the sun, it heats up to 100°, you're going to get like 10 times as much plastic.
51:42
So, it's it's not eating things hot from plastic.
51:46
But how do you reconcile that fact with the fact that you smoke?
51:47
You told me that you smoke a pack of cigarettes a day.
51:54
Uh yeah, noted chain smoker Ben Wilson.
51:55
That's what people know me for. How do you do both?
52:00
Well, and how do you how could you have How do you have 24 Newports a day and you tell me not to microwave plastic?
52:08
You know, it's just one of those mysteries, Sam.
52:08
I don't know how to explain it.
52:11
And how do you can you test to see how much plastic know. That's a good question.
52:13
I would love to do it if you can.
52:14
I don't know that you can.
52:16
I got a new business that we're going to talk about on Monday that's going to address that, by the way.
52:21
I was all prepared for it today. Really? Did you say that? What is it? It's called Float.
52:25
Uh did you see it in the doc? It's called float. dot It's What is it? What's the URL?
52:30
Is Is it called Float, Ben? Where's my [ __ ] read?
52:33
It's called um No, it's called Found. Uh Found. Found. Sorry. found. bio. Found.
52:41
It's basically a $5,000 a month concierge service where they test your blood and tell you all about your body.
52:49
It's very expensive, but sounds incredibly cool.
52:51
For $5,000 a month, you better be touching my body. Well, we'll see.
52:56
Maybe for five that Maybe it'll make women to actually want to touch your body. Ooh.
53:00
Maybe that's Maybe it's Maybe it'll do one better.
53:04
Oh, it's a We're getting tested over here for five grand a month. What? Five grand a month?
53:07
That's such an absurd number. You're doing this?
53:10
No, I'm not doing it, but I think it's close to beta. Uh five grand a month. Would I do it?
53:14
I would sign up for three months, for sure.
53:17
I think you could do it in three month in increments.
53:18
I For $15,000, yeah, I would try that.
53:22
Dude, I had a concierge doctor one time for like a year when I was really sick and it was 25 grand for a year, and it was mostly amazing.
53:30
Also, I understand why rich people and how rich people can get access to so many drugs.
53:35
Cuz like if I wanted to, I could just like text the doctor and be like, "Hey, can you refill this uh this Xanax for me?"
53:42
Uh or like, "Hey, I need some more oxy."
53:44
Like is like and you're paying them so much money that it seems like they're willing to do that. It it is kind of crazy. This took a turn.
53:52
Can I Do we have time We're we're we're way over time.
53:53
Do I have time to ask you guys one more question?
53:56
As long as it's 5 minutes or less.
53:57
Okay, I think it can be 5 minutes or less.
53:58
I'm just curious about this.
53:58
I don't know why this I thought of this as we were asking the five questions.
54:01
But if you were to like simulate your life a thousand times what do you think the ceiling is and what do you think the floor is?
54:11
In other words, like are there a few little things if they broken the wrong way, like Sam Parr is working at a McDonald's in Missouri right now?
54:19
Or like a few breaks where if things had broken the wrong way, you would uh be at like a worth a hundred billion dollars, one of the richest men in the world.
54:29
Like what do you think your floor is?
54:31
What do you think your ceiling is?
54:32
And do you think you ended up about what your average is?
54:36
I think in my case I could tell you I think my floor is rules.
54:38
The ground rules are same genetics and same like fam Not like I'm born in a different country.
54:43
Like I'm I'm saying like same genetics.
54:46
little random variables get changed, you make a few different decisions as you go through life, but same family, same situation, same person.
54:53
I think I was not far from being like homeless alcoholic drug addict.
54:55
Like I think that was actually potentially in the cards or just like in jail because I would con people and steal.
55:02
I think a lot of people can honestly could say that though.
55:05
Like if they like if they like got it If you ever like do certain drugs, like, "Oh man, like the it's actually I can see myself uh living on the streets."
55:14
Uh the best of like the limit um uh I think like a really attainable thing is I could have not sold my company and I think it could have been worth hundreds of millions of dollars and I could have been worth many hundreds of millions of dollars by the time I was 50.
55:33
I think that could have done that.
55:33
I think I could have pulled that off if I was willing to put it in put the work in.
55:38
Yeah, but you you'll probably end up there now anyways. You're 30 now. That's 20 more years. Yeah.
55:44
Given where you're at now, it's pretty likely that you end up over $100 million.
55:48
likely that I'll be worth 20 more years.
55:50
It's almost guaranteed I'll be worth nine figures certain. Yeah, so then [ __ ] it.
55:53
I don't have a good answer for that. So you you you peaked.
55:57
You you got one of the good good rolls of the dice.
56:01
Um I don't think I mean obviously there's some scenarios where you end up you know, in jail, drug addict, whatever.
56:07
But I I don't think that's like the realistic floor for me.
56:08
I think the realistic floor for me is was probably like um Working at Twitch forever. You know, no, not even.
56:16
Like you know, working at uh working as a lab assistant at [ __ ] you know, uh you know, Greenville University's like biology department or some [ __ ] like that.
56:27
Like you know, basically some some job that was like I got on some track that didn't really have a merit-based system.
56:35
It was a time-based system.
56:38
Um so like you know, you basically just get rewarded for how long you've been in the game and not like how much impact you've been able to make.
56:45
And um and that and it might have been in a very kind of like not a complete I was very close to a complete non-business field, right?
56:51
I was like about to go to med school.
56:54
So you know, I was very likely going to be in a different thing.
56:58
But like even if I hadn't done the med school path, you know, just being a engineer somewhere or being a um you know, project manager somewhere was extremely likely for me.
57:06
Um had I just made one or two different decisions kind of at some point.
57:12
The more interesting question is like how far off the peak am I?
57:16
And I think I'm pretty far off the peak to be honest with you.
57:18
And in fact, you know, uh Ben, you were there when we had uh David Friedberg on the on the podcast.
57:23
And I told him Sam, I was trying to butter him up.
57:26
I was like, "Dude, so you've created not one, not two, but pretty much three billion-dollar companies.
57:32
Um if you know, he created Climate, which is a billion-dollar company.
57:37
He created Metromile, which is basically a billion-dollar company.
57:38
He created The Production Board, a billion-dollar company.
57:42
And I said, "You've done that.
57:42
And you know, if I went back to you at age kind of 18, 19, 20, you're in college, and I told you, 'Hey man, this is how it all shakes out.
57:50
You're going to create three billion-dollar companies, three separate billion-dollar companies uh in like the in this like kind of space, science space.'
57:58
Uh what would you have said?
57:58
Would that have been unbelievable to you?
57:59
Would you have Could you have believed that?"
58:00
He goes, "Honestly, I'd probably have been disappointed." And I was like, "What?" Why?
58:08
He cuz I think two things.
58:08
Like one is he wasn't really like money wasn't the like the driving force.
58:12
And then the second piece is like I don't think he feels like he's had a big impact on the world yet.
58:18
Um Like okay, Metromile exists.
58:22
And okay, Climate exists.
58:25
But like you know, what he's trying to do now with like cannabis and other stuff like that is like he's like trying to find like be like the the way we produce food is going to change.
58:33
Or like the way we produce pharmaceuticals is going to change.
58:35
Like that's the now the like the type of swing he goes for, which is like the world used to produce things in factories and farming and blah blah blah.
58:43
And now we do it in a laboratory, blah blah blah.
58:45
Like that He's trying to fundamentally change the means of production.
58:49
And so I think that's what he meant.
58:49
But um I was kind of blown away by that answer.
58:54
And that's the type of thing like remember I said like you hang out with that X Factor person who like just sort of like stuns you into a different like when I said, "When do I realize I'm settling?"
59:02
Is when a guy who's created three billion-dollar companies says I probably would have been disappointed if I knew this was the this was the outcome.
59:08
Um it makes me think, "Wait, what is this guy even going What is this guy's scoreboard if he doesn't think this is a win?"
59:14
And then what does that make me think about my scoreboard?
59:18
How could I update my scoreboard not to match his, but to like let's let's definitely question it, right?
59:24
Like let's let's not just keep it the same as it's been for 10 years. Is he a billionaire?
59:28
I don't think he's personally a billionaire, no.
59:31
But like in that ballpark?
59:33
I I think he said on the podcast that he that he hasn't hit a billion.
59:35
So I think close, but I don't think he said it. Yeah.
59:40
Isn't that funny how you can achieve just what most every single person on Earth would consider like the top of the top of the top of the top and you're like, "Eh."
59:48
That's funny how that works.
59:49
I Googled my my mentor and kind of this my my investor's net worth and I remember being like and then I Googled a whole bunch of celebrities like so I think I think at that time like his his kind of like my ballpark approximate like my triangulated net worth for them was like 700 800 million.
1:00:07
And then I Googled like Britney Spears and it was like 25 or 50.
1:00:12
And then I was like, "Great Brit I was like he's like more than 10 times richer than Britney Spears."
1:00:16
I was like, "Okay, Alex Rodriguez."
1:00:18
I remember when he signed the biggest MLB contract ever.
1:00:19
It was a 10-year 225 million dollar contract or 250 million dollar contract at that time and I remember being like "Oh my god, he's getting three he already has three times A-Rod's contract."
1:00:31
And it just like I just Googled every celebrity I could think of Did you know that you're richer than Ryan Sheckler?
1:00:40
I I think I literally said that.
1:00:40
I was like, "You're 15,000 Jermaine Duprees."
1:00:46
Dude, he's probably even richer than Denzel Washington. This guy's amazing. That's what I'm saying. Oh, easily. Watch.
1:00:51
You know, Denzel net worth.
1:00:54
Dude, I bet you Denzel's got to be worth a hundred at least.
1:00:57
He's been in the game for a while. Piss-poor 280. He's a double Denzel.
1:01:00
You know, like come on, man. That's awesome. All right, I'm out. I