Alia Bhatt's Hidden Struggles: ADHD, Anxiety & Finding Peace as a New Mother

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difficult to understand an actor's life because it's so random and halfhazard but now everything's changed because now I've I have a daughter so now it's like there's a new girlfriend in the family an actor a producer an entrepreneur an environmentalist Al you were saying this is the first in-depth conversation

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you've done in over two years why is that and why now what did little Alia want to be when she grew up I was fascinated by the television I love dreaming whether it was in my classroom whether it was in front of the television when I started acting and when you know your friends are your life

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I started working at the age of 17 and when you're newly you know pursuing your career sometimes you start taking your friends for granted as humans we judge ourselves so much but there's probably no role that we judge ourselves in as much as being a parent how do you win you don't we're actually all giant

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babies through our lives at least for our parents like no matter how old we become we're still babies that's what they see I see that now when every time I would travel my mom would say okay be careful before you cross the road what's a role that you played that you see yourself in that most felt like

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[Music] you the number one Health and Wellness podcast J shett J shett the one the only J shett aliat it is such an honor I'm so grateful that I get to do this with you genuinely so thankful to you you are an icon you are phenomenal talent and unbelievable actress I feel the roles

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you choose are out of this world I'm a huge huge huge fan and I can't wait to dive in to learn more about the person behind all these amazing roles so thank you for being here on purpose thank you for having me yeah I we first met I think it was we met a couple of hours before the Met Gala yeah which I can't

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imagine how kind that was of you but how stressful it was for you can you just walk me through what that was like I think we had been in touch on Instagram for a while and you very kindly said if you're in town I'd love to meet Etc and I said okay let me try and work it out cuz I was literally in town for 2 days

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um but I also realized one thing in that moment is I've become very comfortable with just like going about moments and like special like events or shoots and without really having much conversation with people who I don't know you know ENT we don't really know each other so I've become a bit comfortable just

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talking to people that I'm comfortable with that I know my team you know my family my friends my loved ones so I literally took it as a oh it'll be fun you know a new experience I was not on mommy duty at that time uh so I had the yeah I was missing her a lot of course all the time so I had the time um and I

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just thought it would be fun to have breakfast with somebody and just get to know them a little bit you know yeah apart from the fact that both of us are somehow in the media industry right um talking to people and getting to know each other is something that just humans do which I've not been doing much of

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very frankly so I I that's the reason I was like okay even though it's a bit stressful right now and I have to get into hair and make up right now for the next 4 hours um I will still go ahead and do this because it'll be a new experience I love that mentality I think it's such a great mindset and remember

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when I first moved to LA Brian graser who's a legendary yeah Hollywood producer and Creator he does this thing that he calls curious conversations and so once a month or whatever it is he randomly picks someone that he finds interesting and he invites them over to his home to just hang out with and it's

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his ability to just be able to have a random conversation have a random interaction that may or may not lead to something professional sometimes it doesn't go anywhere exactly like There's No Agenda behind it it's just a conversation yeah which You' land up that's so interesting actually I don't

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really go for any parties or as such and even if I go it's usually just like show face and like you know be there for a couple of minutes and leave I I like to hang out with my like my close friends and we sit and we talk and that also doesn't happen very often so literally I was saying this I think a friend of mine

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the other days I've forgotten what it is to have a conversation and just ask people questions and have them ask me questions and just exchange and share I've always said this before I'm not good with small talk and the reason I'm not good with small talk is because I know it's just small and it's

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specifically for that moment so I can't really indulge in small talk very well but conversation I actually can do and I used to do very well but something's happened in the last couple of years I'm not sure I don't know it whether it was covid also in the middle that just sort of isolated all of us into our own

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cocoons and then life takes over I you know became a mom all my energies kind of focused there I felt like I was retracting a lot generally even like you know conversation wise I also have this thing where I take trips within you know a conversation like I have I take a flight and I come back but just getting

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to know people is always such a it's a different you know um facet to life and to your day yeah it almost requires like a different skill set different part of your brain a different part of your mind and if you get out of practice it can feel really hard to do that how will I know if you also are gone how do how do

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you know if I've taken a How will I know that you've taken a flight I think you'd know okay you'd know okay you'll just see it on my face yeah you know I also feel like a lot of what I've learned in life is through conversation you know um oh I one person said this to me or I you

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know the other guy was saying this to that guy and I picked this up I'll pick up more from what I hear through people and our conversations than I do from of course from a book and stuff but I think conversation sticks for me more than than the other things so I want to have more more conversations more things can

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stick yeah well you were saying this is the first in-depth conversation you've done in over two years yeah why is that and why now 2022 I remember I had a very uh fulfilling year as in it was very um beautifully chaotic there was a lot going on many film releases professionally one thing but

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personally I got married I had a baby um it was a full year I think that was the last time I promoted two films I remember in 2022 gangu Bai and then one of my favorites thank you and then Darlings after that amazing also but those conversations were very very kind of you know specific to fil film

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conversation I think I overs spoke that I just felt like I just have spoken so much I don't have anything more to say professionally then never came an opportunity where I wanted to or there was like somebody approached me to just sit down and have a conversation about life nothing to do with movies or

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whatever so it just didn't happen but I did stay away from doing interviews in 2023 only because I genuinely didn't have anything new to say professionally like like okay film is coming out watch it there's nothing nothing to say in fact a lot of people even said you know what's why have you like shut us out and

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I said I'm not shut anybody out I just don't have anything new to say once I feel like I have some something more to say Visa movies or films I'll I know maybe I'll take up an interview or something actually just talking about life it's not come my way yeah well thank you for trusting us and thanks for

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doing this I want to rewind back cuz I love learning about how who we were in childhood affects we are today I think and now that you're a mother too I'm sure you can see it even though it's very early days just how our early experiences creates such Impressions on who we become what we're attracted to

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and I wonder what did little Alia want to be or who did she want to be when she grew up I was fascinated by the television that's something that I remember very clearly when I was growing up in fact my mom and I speak about it right now because she said my God was I a horrible mother because right now I'm

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so conscious of my daughter's screen screen time not like she has any major screen time at all she's not even you know looked at the iPad but like even if she's watching a song on the television and stuff I'm like oh you know we should limit the time and my mother's like was I a horrible mother cuz we just let you

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be in front of the TV because I you know like that's that's was seemed normal at that time so I was like no you weren't horrible it was a new phenomenon at that time perhaps so but I'm grateful that she didn't stop me from being in front of the television because a lot of my dreaming and imagining and sort of

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getting lost in the world started from there so I love dreaming you know and that's my most fondest memory growing up whether it was in my classroom whether it was in front of the television uh whether it was like on my way to school on my way to something just getting lost in my own thoughts

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imagining being in in front of the camera one day not like I really knew the intricacies of being an actor or you know the layers behind Cinema and the shaping of Cinema in fact one thing I say very candidly is that my cinematic knowledge is not as strong you know I don't have

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not seen every movie in the book I don't know every director I don't know All Tech I I'm very popcorn like with my entertainment like oh good movie Let's watch it let's enjoy it you know I do have specific actors that I'm very fond of but I I don't have all the answers if you talk about like yester year actors

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and you know filmmakers or musicians or anything like that I I don't have all the answers and growing up also it's not like I was bookish about it I didn't study it I just experienced it through my imagination and like just enthusiasm to be entertained yeah so that was a lot of my childhood

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and of course memories with my friends and that's a very big part of who I am yeah endlessly laughing with my friends um doing random things till now we laugh about the same things that we laughed about you know 15 years ago so that's really basically what my childhood was all about you can't change the person's

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grain you know so my grain is to just like enjoy what I call like Mazza I Just Want to Have Fun I grew up watching Govinda and Karishma kapor dance so that I remember that as a very strong memory in my brain is that they kept dancing in different spots sometimes in a garden sometimes on the road sometimes on you

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know in the Swiss Alps and sometimes they kept changing their clothes so I was like why is any anybody stopping them from changing their clothes like you know and or why is anybody stopping them from stopping the traffic and dancing on the road I didn't really put two and two together and understand that

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this is a film is being shot as a crew I was also really little I think I was like three or four but I remember this question mark like what's happening behind that screen what's happening there it's fascinating and that's what really got me very attracted to that being my career in life yeah and then I

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think about it I'm pretty sure subconsciously you know my father's a filmmaker and my mother is a actor um than theater I'm pretty sure I just was hearing a lot of that conversation in the house and that must have gotten into my conscience somehow and that must have become a focus like interest Point

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naturally yeah but this connection that I formed with the television just me and the television happened very like oneon-one yeah I love that yeah my my mom told me that when I was a kid all I do was watch menia over and over again like that was the movie for some reason I have no idea why but like that was the

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movie that I grew up on I watch judai oh yeah okay yeah again and again and again yeah it's so weird right my mom's always liked to me like that's what you used to watch and now I probably watched the movie When I was a bit older and I was like it's good but I don't know why I

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watched it that many times and I was probably that that young age as well and it's it's amazing how there's Lasting Impressions from that the most important moments in my life you just want these people around you you don't want many people around you you just want your really close friends around you and your

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family around you it's definitely ever evolving the feeling of motherhood when you speak about surprises there are multiple surprises on a daily basis would you say that you were always a confident kid and teenager or did that take time to build I was pretty confident I don't think I had confidence

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issues I was very happy on my own you know when you're in school sometimes you find the need to be like hang out in groups although I had a very healthy group my friends would always make fun of me and say why are you always walking walking alone you always end up walking alone with a frown on your face because

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my resting face is a frown right so a lot of the times people think I'm upset about life actually I'm not upset about life I'm just living life because my resting face is a frown so I'm on my phone doing something and then like what happened did something happen I'm like no everything's fine but my face is like

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this um so that's my resting face so I was very comfortable being on my own doing my own thing as I am now and I think that's also a second child thing is what from what I understand is because you're obsessive about the first child and the second child just grows up you know because you're like I can't do

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it all over again the same way at least the parent is like that I don't know but that's what I've understood and I've heard and I think a lot of that rubbed off on me because I know my sister and I respond to situations very differently and I'm always way more Let It Be who cares you know yeah so about things and

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she's but no but why but you know and all of that yeah it's a it's a it's an interesting one how people can see being alone as being distant when like you're saying it's actually I mean that this happen sometimes that people do might feel that because I'm a bit of like I'm happy

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being on my own that there is some like distance or there's a feeling of um not wanting to engage I don't think I not don't want to engage it's just like I'm very comfortable like staying silent as well yeah you know and that's what would happen in school it's not like I would not want to hang out with my friends but

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I was okay also just walking by myself I didn't need to hold somebody's hand and walk and I think that said a lot about just my dreamer personality what I was talking about earlier yeah and gives me the space to sort of float a bit and you were talking about friendship uh which I think such an important part of our

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lives and it seems to be such an important part of yours how have your are those friends that you had then I assume they're the same friends you have now they're people that you've kind of grown up with yeah the exact same friends what's their life look like like are they all in the industry too are

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they doing different things like so um most of them aren't just my best friend um Ki aansa she's also an actor we all have like live in different parts of the world like four of us live in Mumbai one of my best friends she lives in New York the other lives in Toronto one lives in

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London one lives in sing or we a group of Nine Girls and honestly the reason I have to give them a lot of credit because the reason was I can still say they're my best friends and we're so close is because of the patience that they've given me you know my journey uh as an actor started very early I started working at

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the age of 17 and when you're newly you know pursuing your career your focus becomes your career and even though I always made it a point to hang out with my friends sometimes you start taking your friends for granted um and I that naturally did happen and of course the great thing is the same things that we

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used to fight about 10 years ago is the same thing that we possibly fight about today so what what's lovely is nothing's changed um but what's also lovely is that there's still something to fight for you know um and it I do give them a lot of credit for that for just being

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patient with me you know showing up even though many times I can't show up cuz I'm work or I'm I'm working or I'm here or I'm there you know um making excuses for me when when I'm unable to be at a particular you know getaway or a party or a dinner but I do my bit to you know reconcile and you know make up for it um

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but J they really like my family and I and that's something that's very clear that when you make friends that stay with you for so long they they they are family and a lot of people told me that you know actors don't really have friends I don't know said that yeah so like but why this is in the in the

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beginning when I started acting and when you know your friends are your life um that usually doesn't happen because you end up leading such isolated lives and you're so busy it's very difficult to hold on to the earlier friendships also it's difficult to understand an actor's life or somebody

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who's in the industry their life because it's so random and halfhazard so props to them for really like yeah they they've really and they've made an effort to even understand my work but now everything's changed because now I've have I have a daughter you know so now it's like there's a new girlfriend in the family

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and now it's all about like they don't even want to talk to me they just want to talk to her I was like FaceTiming my friend yesterday who was in New York and we were FaceTiming and Raha was there my daughter and her foot was in my face and I was trying to talk about something very serious and she's like I'm sorry

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just can't focus because I'm only looking at rah's foot is in your face yeah I love that I love that I want to I want to jump I want to talk about R in a second but when you're talking about your friends I don't have an actor's life but my life is also on a plane traveling moving around and I speak to

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my best friend who was my best man at my wedding probably three times a week and I completely agree with you it's all because of him because when I call him he'll make time yeah he'll shift his schedule he'll be a yeah available to figure out a way and because of that it allows me and ask to maintain this

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friendship when you know I left living in London eight years ago and we've been able to with all our time zone issues and everything else maintain this friendship that we've had for 20 years now and I'm so grateful to him because you're so right that if individuals like that and again we do our own part and

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make up for it and now I'm flying to Dubai to go and see him because he now moved to Dubai and so I'm making sure that I go and take out a few days to just catch up with him yeah like when when I met you in New York for breakfast the day before that I was spent the whole day with my friend Mna who lived

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who's my New York friend um so the two days that I was there I made sure that I met her on the one whole day that I was there and it's it's like I do you do your best but I know in my heart that they're doing better and I'm very grateful to them for that um and whenever it feels like

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you know because it's a it's life's give and take right whenever it feels like one's taking too much and the other's giving too much you know we find a way to balance it out yeah yeah it is some something that really grounds me and I remember like at the most important moments in my life I you just want these

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people around you you don't want many people around you you just want your really close friends around you and your family around you yeah you're so right what what was it like with your wedding with having them there was that like a special expi yeah we got married at home at at our house where we've been we were

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living together and are still living currently and uh yeah it was like 40 people and my girlfriends were like nine out of the 40 people and they're plus ones and and it was amazing and it and it's it's one of the Fondest Memories that I've had but like I remember even when I was you know in hospital like

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just i' give after I'd given birth and everything like I asked my sister you know have you told the girl s you know have you informed them it's the first it it comes to my mind like these things they sort of embedded in me in my body and um even though it's not every day even though it's not every week that we

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hang out and meet or speak as often they're a part of my life yeah in in a very deep way now now I'm not surprised that any of your friends want to ignore you and talk to Raha because she's so adorable I was I was just telling you I saw this video of you I think you and renir and her were traveling and the

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paps were like waving at her and said Hi and then she waved back and said hi and it was it was the most adorable thing I sent it to my wife straight I was like look how cute she is like she's adorable and how has motherhood been for you so far I remember like you said in New York

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you were missing her like I remember you talked about her so much like how has it been for you what has been a surprise and what has been something that you expected it to be that way I don't think you can prepare yourself for what you're about to feel to be very honest my mother said this to me earlier before I gave birth

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she said you know I said do you remember something something and she's like no I don't remember I said why don't you remember anything she said because you'll be surprised you forget you forget what happens before I forgotten a lot of what it was pre motherhood in terms of my feeling or my way of life or

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the way my brain functioned at that time my days are so full now in fact I wonder what I was doing with my time earlier even if I was not work like if I was not working what was I doing in the day because now it's a full day like wake up at 7:00 in the morning and you know she's at sleep asleep by 8:39 and I'm

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asleep soon after by 10:30 from 7 to 10:30 it's like on a you're on a treadmill you know it's just like you're running when you speak about surprises there are multiple surprises on a daily basis currently because she's a toddler she's a 2-year-old right like now she's just turned two so now she's really

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bubbling uh a lot of surprises every day it's definitely ever evolving the feeling of motherhood but I think one thing I can say for sure and it's a it it is a good thing but sometimes it can also be a bad thing bad is the wrong word but like it can be also be something that people

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have to put up with is that I think I've just of course become very incessantly protective ever since she was born so I remember the months earlier months um after she was born it was Bliss for me I really enjoyed the instant sort of survival you know like this this being needs me to survive at this moment

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you know that very survival sort of nurturing feeling even though there was sleepless nights Etc and of course I have to acknowledge the fact that I have a huge privileged in that aspect that I have help and I have a great support system and all of that but that instant sort of bonding period

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I deeply enjoyed it but I was also filled with so much worry and that's something that I have to talk about very openly and that's a very normal feeling is what I understand for mothers to feel especially new mothers to feel but what I also learned with time is that the worry doesn't go away it just changes

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form and depending on your personality as to how anxious your mind is or whether you know you're able to deal with certain situations better it might um move forward differently but it's a beautiful combination of Feeling Extreme love with extreme worry there's a lot of worry and by worry and I mean I don't

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feel like I'm stressed out or I'm like stressing her out I think I become pretty childlike when I'm with her one thing I'm pretty mindful about about is um to really enjoy her childhood you know a lot of parents who are like who have kids 18 year olds 20-year olds keep telling me enjoy this time enjoy this

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time in fact in New York I met a woman in an elevator who was there to drop her son off to college and she I was holding Raha in my hand who was um not when I was there for the Met right after I was holding Raha in my hand and you know Raha was fidgeting with her and she said to me she said just enjoy this time and

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I'm dropping my son off to college and time just flies and I could see the pain in her eyes so I really take that advice very seriously about enjoying the time so I really try and be very present with Raha which is something that I don't do very often in my other you know moments

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in life I'm always like people always telling me you've left the building you've reached home I'm always like 10 steps ahead but with her I'm I try to be a lot like in the present and in the moment and it happens more naturally because I want to joy every second but there is a sense of like you know I'm

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always like my heart is just way wide open and I'm just like always worried about something or the other Vis her but I'm I'm guessing that something that I'm just going to have to like live with for the rest of my life yeah what we don't realize is our parents are also just what we been discussing giant babies

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you're so used to like thinking about your life like this like this is my moment and my this and when you just got you think about it at a on a largest scale all the worry just disappears so when I look at the struggle and the suffering that there is in the world it really makes me count my

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blessings and be so grateful for everything that we have in our lives because it's hard for people in the world what's it been like to see when we become a dad and a girl dad especially like he's amazing he's very creative when it comes to entertaining her she entertains him as well like they both

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have a very special um friendship I would say their bond is not like you'd feel like they're two friends like either two adults or two toddlers you know different at different moments in life and he's like literally for when he looks at Raa it's like stars in his eyes there's that and of course for any parent but I

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when I see it because I've known rir PRI and I know him now I see the difference I see the difference in the way he is with people you know as a as a father he's just so sort of full you know it's not like he was ever edgy or ever he always had a very calm demeanor or anything but there's a fullness which I

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experienced firsthand and that I see on a daily basis and it's actually really sweet and special to you know watch their conversations and very often I'm just like sneakily you know videotaping a lot of their random moments and they don't even know I'm doing it eventually I guess one of them looks at the camera

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and then I put it off but it's just the beginning but the beginning is just so unique and special at least from where I'm sitting and from what I've seen and just to watch your partner also manifest love in that way is very interesting go on what do you mean I mean we have love for each other right I

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have love for r r has love for me I have love for Raha Raha has love for me and and rid and R has love for Raha so it's you see different moments of Love transpire differently in one house in one Under One Roof and it wasn't always like this right like Raha has come into our life now so you know the before and

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the after although I don't remember much of it like as I mentioned earlier but you know moments and you know feelings and you know how every like we' watched sunsets together but now when we're watching the sunset with her it's it's a different feeling yeah you know it's a

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very beautiful feeling yeah it's very fulfilling yeah so sweet you're making me feel like I've got so much to look forward to so I'm like yeah now I'm like I I I always tell I'm like I want to be a girl dad so bad like yeah and he really wanted to be a girl Dad yeah he really did I'm doing this thing where I

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send Raha emails um I've been doing it since she's born every month oh and um like just like an amalgamation of like photos and videos and what happened and just thoughts and feelings wow it's like yeah somebody somebody said that somebody this for somebody so I was like it's a great idea because it's like a

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live memory book you know I don't have the discipline and the energy to actually fill out an a physical memory book so I thought this is like a digital way of doing it it's easier to search and um and it's nice like when maybe she's 15 you know I'd give this to her and say listen this is all the memories

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that we collected for you over the years and go ahead and have some fun what a special gift what kind of things have you put in there right now just like photos um you know videos thoughts mainly just visuals of her with either like us with either one of us or her grandparents or you know her aunt or

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uncle and stuff like that and just random moments you know and like a little note that you did this today and you know we had such a lovely trip here and something happened and just sharing yeah whatever I can it's like within the moments whatever comes out at that time but yeah so when I'm sneakily recording

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the two of them it's uh and I sometimes when I review it and it's it's really very heartwarming to watch because you know that this is like something very special is just cooking like I remember in New York we were speaking about this and I remember my mom sent me a photo of

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like a baby walking down the street with like many bags like it was like a random like a Pinterest image or something and I discussed this with you and and we said we actually both agreed that we're actually all giant babies through through our lives at least for our parents like no matter how old we become

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we're still babies mhm you know um that's what they see that's what they see and I I see that now you know I see that now when every time I would travel my mom would say okay be careful before you cross the road you know take care of your arms and legs frustrated yeah I'm like what do you say what do you me take

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care of your arms and legs but I understand that now yeah yeah I I mean I'm not I'm not a parent but everything you're saying to me even when I think about it for a second I think I'd be exactly the same I'm like that with my friend's kids like if my friend's children are over and I remember my

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friends I can't remember what they were doing something called Adventure parenting or something I can't remember those one of these parenting techniques so we're sitting at one end of a living room the kid is at the other end of the living room and she's like just learned to walk but she's like putting her hands

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through candles like this and so I'm about to run over and like take their kid away from the candle and they're like no no no she'll learn and that was their parenting technique okay and my heart was like I was and it's not even my child but I'm feeling so much and you know I'm constantly like whenever I see

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kids running around again friends kids in my home or whatever I'm like looking for their heads to not bump against the table like I find myself even being that way now so I can't imagine when it's your own child like you know one thing is worry for the physical physical danger or within the moment but the

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other worry is also worry whether you're doing your parenting bit right worry whether you're giving them you know the right tools to go with and like and she's so small right now she's two so there's no need for me to be thinking about all of this but every moment moment is a learning right if I'm trying

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to impart some sort of Life knowledge to her in a specific moment say she's having dealing with an emotion and I need to help her deal with it because basically what what from what I've un understood is that this is where they really start like pushing their boundaries and understanding the world

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and instead of confining them to specific emotions that this is the way you're supposed to be and this is the way you're not supposed to be you help them deal with every emotion you know spec because happiness is easy to deal with but the other ones are not right um and it starts it starts now it starts very

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early so giving her the tools to deal with these emotions I need to have those tools myself as well number one number two I think this is where my you know cutting fast forward into the future happens is that I I know I can't be a perfect parent and from what I understand is I can just be good enough

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but I have to be able to be so present and one with her feeling what she's feeling asserting certain um values and behaviors but also just letting her be you know so there's so many of these permutation combinations that I'm just like constantly toying with so that's one other worry about like just future

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and life and then of course there's this physical thing then is she eating well and is she sleeping well and you know uh what's going to happen tomorrow and what's going to happen day after and I'm also a working mom again I have to acknowledge my privilege I do have a great support system around her but the

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worry is not going to leave you know like oh if I'm away is somebody going to say something is she going to pick up on something that I would not want her to pick up on all those things but you know you just take each day as it comes and just move forward so I guess the reason I'm speaking about it is because it's

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it's a very real feeling and it's not something that I just got figured out since day one I I'm constantly sort of wrapping my head around it on a daily basis but apart from that it's joyous no I appreciate you being so honest about it because I think the worry point and especially what you

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raised this idea that as humans we judge ourselves so much but there's probably no role that we judge ourselves in as much as being a parent because you can almost really see how this innocent beautiful being is taking on so much of your energy your words your behavior the environment and I think that almost

35:37

makes us so mindful and thoughtful because with our partners with our parents we can you know we can kind of be a bit LAX and sometimes we can say things we don't mean or whatever but when you're with a child it's almost like you realize how precious they are and and how those exchanges are and it's

35:53

so interesting what you're saying this idea of self- judgment and and it's fascinating because I've met people who've said my parents were always around and gosh it was really really hard and then I meet other people who say my parents were never around and it was really really hard and then you

36:10

hear my parents forced me to study this and I don't like them for it and then someone says my parents forc me to study this and I love them for it and it's it's almost like you kind of look at that and you go well how do you win you don't though that's the thing because human beings are hard what we don't

36:25

realize is our parents are also just what you discussing giant babies you know so we're all figuring I know I'm a mother right now and it's not like I've got it all figured out and I have by by all figured out I mean it's not like oh I have all the answers to life you know for every particular issue most

36:44

definitely do not I'm very grateful for the life that we have and the comfort that we enjoy and I literally I'm so much more grateful after becoming a mom it's it's so surprising how you're I think what we were talking about what's surprising I always found myself to be somebody who had you know a decent

37:05

amount of empathy but I think the empathetic quotient just truly multiplies once you're a mom because you you picture your child in every situation so when I look at the struggle and the suffering that there is in the world it really makes me count my blessings and be so grateful for

37:27

everything that we have in our lives because it's hard for people in the world and it's not I'm always somebody who likes to believe in the good and the positivity and I'm always trying to put out oh the there's light at the end of the tunnel and you know it's going to rain because the sun can Shine That's my

37:50

belief and you only is appreciate the sunshine when they're these are all great quots for Instagram but when it's real life um and you see the suffering and and and the struggle that some people have to go through it's you really have to be just take a second and be like wow everything's good you know

38:08

just cut to a wide shot and everything is great in fact very often what I do especially when I'm having a bad day I have this little balcony at the back of my my bedroom and it's like really small it's more like like an like a fire exit or something and I just go and stand there and I can see a lot of because in

38:26

bumbay a lot of the buildings especially where I live are like very close together so this my sound a little creepy but when when um I go and stand there I like like I look I just have like a wide view of activity in different people's homes somebody's walking with some clothes somebody's

38:44

watching television I'm not looking into their bedrooms but it just gives me a sense of Life existing whilst yours is and it just puts a lot of things into perspective because you're so used to like thinking about your life like this like this is my moment and my this and when you just cut and you think about it

39:03

at a on a larger scale all the worry just disappears yeah you know and you just you just you take a second and you just feel very grateful for where you are in life yeah I could tell how much that was yeah you look on the verge of tears I mean that's what I'm saying when I talk about it because that's how much

39:20

maybe internal body I have just as a person for people in the world and also for most most importantly for my loved ones and for my daughter but that's how my world has opened up I think post being a mom way more aware about the other life that exists as opposed to your own yeah have

39:41

you thought about things you want to do or get involved in to help the communities or people that you're noticing or things like that that I mean I I i' rather do and not talk cuz sometimes it feels like you're talking to make a point as to see what a great person I am I think there's defitely on

39:57

a I can I can be a way nicer person on a daily basis and way more helpful but I do whatever I can do and um help however I can help whether it's you know for People for Animals whatever I can do but of course I think I'm probably just even not even scratching the surface um there's way way way more that I can do

40:19

on a daily basis no I appreciate that I think I think all of us can and feel that way and you're right it's better to do and not talk so I appreciate your humility in that way and and keeping it that way I was thinking about this idea this concept you brought back from our conversation which shows that you're a

40:34

good listener and have a great memory because the fact that you're recalling our conversation from like nearly a year ago now if not two years maybe a year ago a year ago now yeah yeah now two years AG yeah in 2025 correct two years ago right it was 2023 now or no maybe 20 yeah we yeah 23 23 and so like this big

40:53

24 was it 24 yeah maybe it's maybe it's 24 um but this big baby idea what parts of yourself do you think you're still babying or that are still a baby in your own self emotionally oh I think I still experience okay speaking just about movies in cinema because I think when I watch a movie I experience it like I

41:13

like a childood you know I I'm not um measured with my emotions or my responses in fact very often I'm like if I'm watching whoever I'm watching whether it's you know rid or my sister or something I'm like what's going to happen now why is she doing that they're like we did not make the movie we don't

41:29

know but I'm like I'm just so involved in it and I just need to know I'm like chatting through it um so I think in that way um so ranir is like a silent Watcher ranir is yeah he and he's he between the two of us is is much better you know Visa his Cinema knowledge and movies and he's way more diligent with

41:50

it in fact a lot of my movie watching experiences is shared with him and because of him yeah but like I I'm like always and then he was like he's like we we'll find out I don't know you know same with my sister I'm like shine why why is this happening and she's like I don't know Al I did not make it you

42:12

know um so in that sense I'm I'm very physically involved so I'm not like an adult watching a movie and all I'm a child um I think still this would happen to me as a as as a child as a kid a lot is that if I'm like exhausted tired I would just cry you know and not realize why I'm crying

42:31

and I'm like thing is horrible and my mother would be like darling are you tired do you need just everything's a bit hard so that happens to me when I'm tired even now I suddenly like just start weeping about something completely random and it happened to me a couple of weeks ago actually I was with my friends

42:51

and I just started crying about something not being right and they're like are you okay and then they're like I'm just tired I not had a good night's sleep so that happens to me a lot I think also curiosity I don't think um my curiosity has left me I can see that now as when

43:08

like with Raha and stuff she always wants to know but why why doing that why is that who's that who that person like it always wants to know everything I want to know the conversation that's happening across the room between two people that I know of course and I'm like watching them speak and you know

43:26

like trying to read what and then like lip read what they're saying to each other and if I couldn't understand bits of it then I just asked what happened what happened who said what you know so the curiosity is still alive yeah yeah rad does it with people we don't know we'll be at restaurant she'll be like

43:41

let's pretend we know what conversation they're having it let's have I love doing that she loves doing that I love doing that I'm like just talk to me man like she's like she's like no no this more interesting let's do this like all right then especially if somebody's having a fight then you want to overhear

43:55

it even more yeah yeah yeah she's like what do you think they're talking about let's let's pretend to have their conversation I'm like I don't know what they're talking about I know nothing about them like it's okay whatever it healthy baby that's all of course yeah that is the number one no that is the

44:09

number one priority you're right a healthy child is is the most important priority but there's there's particular things and and RI is one of two girls so she's kind of used she's like okay with that and so but you had no preference you were like kind of like whatever comes yeah I was like just help you know

44:26

that time I was just thinking about like health health health everything goes well smoothly but of course I think she's really like I said even for my girl gang they were like so excited like we have one girls trips are now going to be so different you know my best friend one of my best friends is getting

44:42

married this year and she's like are you coming she's like yeah she's like I don't care if you're coming I hope Raha is coming I was like yeah rah's coming I love that what what's has Rah already watched any of your movies already no she's too she's too small to like watch a full movie She's watched multiple

44:58

songs um of mine and and be and now we've sort of exposed her to other people's songs as well but she I think now she's got this feeling that everything is Our Song in fact the other day we some song played and I was like oh it was like I think it was a Shah ruk Khan song from Moab and I was like I was

45:14

doing some dance step and she's like Mama your song so I was like no mama papa song so I was no this is Shah ruk Khan [Laughter] song you've played so many powerful women on screen so many and I've always admired you for the choices of roles you've played I think I said that to you

45:36

when we first met what's the one you are excited for her to see is there one movie that you think I can't wait for her to be able to watch this and obviously different ages she'll be able to watch different ones but I mean when she's much older i' I'd want her to at in her own time watch the films that

45:54

really sort of um shaped me as an actor and the experiences that I learned a lot from like for example a film like Highway MH um and a film like gangubai or or a film like razi RI I was say but in fact I recently realized that I I don't have many child I mean some of them but like very like child friendly

46:19

definitely that's why I was saying that at a certain age yeah so so in fact that M has made me want to take up a film that is loved by kids or that is like a kidfriendly film it's recently made me want to do that and I'm now I'm I'm on the hunt yeah cuz now you're looking at your filmography and

46:39

going CU she's going to have to be 18 years old watch ex I was like yeah she can watch a couple of films I'm not sure how much she'd want to watch like gangu Bai and you know Highway at this age or not this age or even when she's four or five or six I want her to enjoy films that are like so I know brahmastra is a

46:56

film that kids liked a lot like when I meet kids now they say brahmastra or they say like Rocky Rani and I like your this song kids more they like songs songs yeah I remember like I grew up watching songs I mean my memory is more so of Music MH and that really leaves a longlasting Impressions there one thing

47:15

that I feel very grateful for is that I can sing to my daughter I mean I'm I'm glad I have a decent voice um because very often you know she demands songs out of me and I'm just like singing and I'm like especially when I'm putting her to sleep so yeah now I'm on the hunt to do like more kid-friendly yeah I love

47:34

that I could see you doing a voice over too of an animation or oh yeah love that i' love that that would be super fun I could see you do that what's a role that you played that you see yourself in that most felt like you is there a role that you played that feels like you personality wise I don't see this um a

47:52

lot of the people who uh who who love me and who know me say this and it's going to sound bizarre but they say I'm gangu no way yeah they like this they say that that's my Alter Ego you know the personality the boisterousness the way she not not her situation of course not her circumstances but the way she and I

48:14

think that's also somehow there was like a nice push and pull in in in playing that part she was very gangster she was very I think that is my Alter Ego I don't think that that's the way I am in my real life um but it's it is definitely the part that I enjoyed depicting the most um in a sort

48:37

of humorous way a lot of my friends and people say you're gangu she's gangu Bai you know and they say that um but I think there is some truth to that only I guess from the essence of the fact that she's a child but she's got a certain like yeah she's got some spice exact some like some fieriness

48:57

and then what's a character role that you played that you'd like to borrow some energy from so I think at this particular moment I need some playful bubbly energy which is like sort of superficial if you call it or frivolous or it's just like silly and silly yeah um so I was actually thinking about this

49:16

the other day but I feel like I need some of that so Doan had a bit of that Doan had that but she was also a little like a journalist you know a little maybe I can take it from Rocky's character from Rani so much but there's this character that I played in HTI sharmak her name is kavia I was actually

49:34

watching a song of that the other day and I was like I don't remember who you know that girl was at that time that feeling not like I feel like I'm like old or something like that but there was like a silliness there that I feel that I can do more with you know cuz I think I was pretty

49:54

silly and now I've just become a little bit more in control at most times yeah which I think I can do with some silliness yeah yeah I I feel like when I met my wife I was like I took life very seriously and she's like just silly and playful all the time and it's so helpful having that because otherwi you're so right you just

50:13

kind of get stuck in your ways but honestly you asked character so I said I named this character because I was also watching this song the other day but actually I when I I have I have my daughter in front of me and I I get that silly from her yeah so actually I just like I was saying earlier I just tune

50:31

into that moment with her I just need to do it more for me though like for my vibe and not just when I'm with her yeah yeah you know be more open to a silly joke as well yeah you know and like crack a silly joke if at all I think I don't do that anymore okay yeah it's become a bit it's BEC a bit too grown up yeah do

50:56

you are you someone that energizes when you're on your own or energizes when you're around people certain people can really energize me yeah but I think I'm mostly energized on my own yeah yeah more than a certain number of people I think can really drain the energy out and that's does tend to happen say say

51:15

if I've gone on a promotional tour for a film because you're just meeting so many people in you're engaging by the end of it I'm just drained you're just Zapped you know because you're just constantly engag in so much I think I'm also one of those people who is very you know I like

51:32

I think of there being like this sort of twinkly light in front of me where I feel like I'm always I can take people's energy in pretty quickly I'm not somebody who's just blocked off to everybody's energy so if somebody's walked into the room and they're not having a bad day that'll reach me very

51:48

quickly if some something has happened um which is a like chaotic situation it's not like I can block it off yeah so I'm very receptive to people's energies so I can you know almost like it it comes right to me so which is why I maybe prefer to not engage as much and to stay out of most

52:11

conversations and or to stay like speak to just the people that I'm most comfortable with because I'm familiar with their energy there's nothing new there what do you do with the energy when it comes to you when you're sensing new yeah oh it does I behave very weirdly sometimes I really do have I've

52:27

noticed that about myself later on I'm like why did I behave so weird in that moment and like a friend like somebody who knows me very well would be like I find it strange talking to you at party sometimes Alia because you can behave really strange and say some very strange things because you're so I'm so confused

52:43

with the different multiple energies I don't know what to do with them you know but what helps is your surround system and the people that are around you especially the team that I work with they know me so well that even if I'm having a day like that that's why it's very important for me

53:02

when I'm working with a particular team for me to be very comfortable with them because if I'm not comfortable with them all this will add to my daily energy zapping you know again it seems like I'm talking about all my energy and my things that they might have their own day and I'm very receptive to that as

53:21

well and everybody's sensitive to everybody here because I'm talking about myself I just thought that like you know it's important to find a way to go through the day where you do your own thing and you don't demand too much from people and likewise vice versa I don't demand too much from people as well when

53:40

I'm going about my day when did your self-care and mental health advocacy work begin like what was it that led you in that direction where you started to prioritize selfcare talk about anxiety talk about mental health like when did that become important for you and why I think my sister she was a huge part of

53:59

that I think and obviously I'm doing it at a very small level whenever I can talk about it through my own lens I do Shaheen my sister wrote a book um it's called I've never been unhappier and um she's you know lived with depression since she was 13 and um has built some amazing Tools in life to be where she's

54:21

at today and she speaks about it beautifully so something about her honesty um made inspired me to talk about it not in a way where you seem like you're complaining about your life because again you're not in a position to complain you have it all but just to talk about it so that somebody somewhere

54:43

watching might just resonate with it yeah and feel like oh okay you know I was I was having um I was having the same day or I I I have the same feelings so it's I'm not alone you know everybody feels it it's it's happened very often with me where I've seen some aess celebrity Hollywood International or like even

55:08

here speak about something and um I've resonated or connected with that and I was like oh they're feeling it as well so you know it's happened it happens with all of us so that's when I think I became more open to talk about having any specific xiety and also I was recently clinically diagnosed with it so

55:29

I had a proper wow backing for me to not just say I'm just having an anxious day okay it's it's not just that um ADHD and um anxiety and I actually seed it out only because I was actually finding it very hard in um my body was heating up in Social Gatherings and I was like physically responding to it um so I was

55:53

also finding it very hard to focus on certain things and my focus was going in and out and then I realized that I gave myself a lot of credit for being some an amazing multitasker and then I realized that yeah I can multitask but it does take a toll on me and I need to understand why it's taking a toll on me

56:11

because I'm forgetting the most random things like things that I have scheduled I'm forgetting why am I forgetting these things so I did a test professional test not like some random personality test or something um over 3 days and you know I was diagnosed with ad DHD and anxiety

56:28

and immediately I was happy my ADHD in me gave me it gave me information right so whenever there's lack of information is when I get most thrown off um so I'm always seeking information Comfort very averse to change so the minute I was aware of these things it's actually made the dealing much simpler and I'm not on

56:49

any medication or anything although I can be but I chose not to and I'm actually just actively working on it to help um get through it yeah and I think I manag pretty well yeah thank you for sharing that I mean I think it's so useful for people to hear that because as you said we always think everyone

57:09

else is doing just fine and especially at parties and events it's fascinating to me how many people who go to these whether award shows whatever it may be the amount of people who say to me I am so anxious and everyone's feeling that way everyone's going through it everyone's worried about

57:26

what they're wearing how they look how the knight's going to be who they're going to bump into like it's so incredible that everyone's feeling the same way yeah everyone's trying to act normal and so I think you know people like yourself sharing that you feel it you experience it and also how a

57:42

diagnosis can actually relieve you of that pressure it does yeah and relieve you of that stress because it makes you feel like you know the your there's a lot of con there's a lot of noise there's a lot of chatter in your brain and you feel like is it just my brain or is it just something that is happening

57:58

to me today and the minute you find an answer to it you feel like oh it's not it's not something that I was just making up for myself that's what it is yeah and it just I think it's comforting it's comforting to know that you had an inclination that something was holding you back from going about your day in a

58:17

specific way and now there's an answer to it yes you get the comfort and then you put specific sort of you know structure in place in your life to help you get through that and whatever that may be to each his own I chose to find ways to Center myself through different ways and you know support use the

58:36

support of my team to like maybe delegate a little bit more do things so that I'm not remind me about certain things all those little little things so I was like forgetting the most random things but I think the need for getting it more in order came after being a mom cuz I was like I don't want to forget

58:50

anything related to my daughter you know I think that was my big fear again parenting pressure which that you yourself Etc but yeah that would that happened I think last to last year and it's been a while since that happened the reason I also again talk about it is not to seem like oh I'm having such a

59:09

hard time and look at me and like you know feel bad for me it's none of that and I think a lot of the times it's me and my sister when we sit and talk about it it's not like we're only talking to each other about how we're struggling but it'll just somehow come up when we're talking about this happening and

59:25

it's just understood that it's because of XY Z reason so the next time you talk about it there's no need to explain again so it's like an unsaid conversation so I think the reason I'm also talking about it is that maybe a lot of times I might respond a certain way in a public event or a gathering or

59:43

a situation or a conversation or a talk and maybe I'm responding because of XYZ reason yeah you know yeah for sure for sure and you were reminding me of something when you talked about multitasking uh there was a study that showed that only 2% of the population the world population can actually

1:00:01

multitask but when 98% of people here that they think they're that 2% and so everyone thinks that they can multitask but really it's it's such a rare rare rare ability I actually realize I cannot multitask I definitely can't I can't because I like I I I can't so I can take up multiple multiple projects projects yeah

1:00:24

at the same time and I can I can be diligent the word is I can micromanage I can micromanage multiple things but I definitely cannot multitask I thought I could always multitask when I can't yeah no but it's what you said it the the trick is you think you can do it and you can probably do it for some

1:00:42

time but what you don't realize is that that battery runs out and then very quickly you realize you can't do it at all and so maybe you can do it for a day or maybe you could do it for an hour or two maybe with certain things I mean I would always say I think women are always used to multitasking and all

1:00:58

maybe we are I don't know I would say this but I've grown to realize about myself that in fact I almost stop hearing one thing if I'm focusing on the other it's like just my brain just shuts the other part down yeah what have been some daily practices or habits that have changed your life that have really

1:01:15

helped you deal with the crazy schedule now becoming a mother playing all the different roles that you play what have been some non-negotiables that you've really had to hone in on I have to be very Frank here because there have been multiple habits that I tried to set in place for myself but I've not followed

1:01:35

through with either so I'm one of those people who hasn't uh been able to they see when I I'm not talking about getting a workout in or that's like a daily habit which has become like a part of my life now it's not even a habit looking outside the window and listening to music and

1:01:53

really unwinding I'm not talking about those things because those are that's life but like for a brief period I was used to write things down so I could remember it I don't do that anymore for a brief period I used to meditate because it used to help center me I don't do that anymore for a brief period

1:02:07

I used to color and paint whenever I used to feel anxious I don't do that anymore I just don't do anything anymore you know so I'm actually because I love that Honesty yeah because a lot of people sometimes feel like especially now it's 2025 started the new year you need to set new resolution need to do

1:02:23

something new you need to you know um take control of your life in this particular way there is that pressure to do that and do that and do that and do that and in fact there was this challenge called the 75 hard that I heard about and I was like oh I'm going to do the 75 hard and you know I'm going

1:02:42

to do this and my sister was like Alia you're not because you have enough going on now you don't need one more challenge you know you're a mom and you're working and you're doing like don't like right now you others might be able to specifically you do not need to take this on and I was like yeah why am I

1:03:01

going to take it on because again I'm going to be compelled to go through with it and I'm not going to be able to go through it and then I'm going to feel like a failure yeah which is fine I'm okay with feeling like a failure but you know why do I add something more to my plates so I've just realized to cut the

1:03:15

Clutter do what comes naturally so there's nothing new that I can speak about as a non-negotiable um because I haven't stuck with it that's the TR I love the honesty I think that's going to help so many people just like you don't yeah it's it can get so like you hear like well some I remember at one point

1:03:38

in my life my morning schedule is still pretty intense but it used to be even more because I'd have journaling and I'd have gratitude I have this and I have that and so much of it what I've realized is becomes natural yeah and so now it doesn't need to be this forced habit like my like my workouts are

1:03:53

perhaps for myself you know become so natural that I have to get a workout in Daily like 6 days a week for example I'll give last year the start of 2024 I started the Year by finishing a book and I was like Wow because I hadn't finished a book in a really long time I was like wow this year I'm going to finish at

1:04:11

least five books that was the last book I finished last year I love it it's not cuz I would always start a book and not finish it you know um so I read a couple of books on like parenting and this and that and like different different things but I not finish the books I like I'm

1:04:26

going to finish five books this year didn't finish anything I love it so already like you know mid mid 2024 I was like I'm already slacking you know I'm already behind my goals so I decided this year I'm not going to make any resolutions or whatever I'm just going to be just going to live going to go

1:04:46

about the day and do what comes naturally because if it comes naturally it'll stick yeah and it'll become a part of your life anyway yeah I think you're going to relieve a lot of people pressure and stress yeah I think it is it is important to acknowledge that not going through with new tasks that you s

1:05:03

you set for yourself for self growth is okay as long as you're mentally conversing with yourself and actually being aware of the areas of growth that kind of growth is enough I'm very eager to grow in life spiritually mentally physically emotionally but you can do that through

1:05:24

through listening and through ation and through talking to yourself mhm conversation with yourself I think that's my non-negotiable but I don't call that a daily practice I think that's like that's an hourly practice yeah you know yeah that's constant that's constant and that everybody does so that's also

1:05:41

enough but I do have to say it's very therapeutic for me to watch other people go about their regime and their lives on Instagram reals when I see like Sunday resets and Saturday resets and people lighting a candle and cleaning their house I love it it's so relaxing just you feel like you did it

1:05:57

yourself yes I think that's what it is it's a guilty pleasure cuz it feels like it was me but actually not yeah you just living vicariously through them it's like ASMR as well it's like that feeling yeah are you an ASMR fan yeah yeah yeah it's such a like it's such a therapeutic healing process seeing people do things

1:06:14

that are good for themselves for sure it's amazing IIA it's been such a joy talking to you today thank you so much for being so open being so honest I think you made me laugh you nearly made cry you nearly made yourself cry uh it's been such a joy getting to know you more deeply and I'm so grateful that my

1:06:31

audience did as well we end every show with the final five these questions have to be answered in one word to one sentence maximum we do this with every year so aliat these are your final five the first question is what is the best advice you've ever heard or received from my father I'd rather be stupid than

1:06:50

pretend to be intelligent when did he say that to you and how has it impacted you he said this to me when I think I was wary of asking a question in class and he said you'd rather be stupid than pretend to be intelligent because if you don't ask the question you'll never learn especially today I think

1:07:12

there's um such little patience for getting things wrong so I rather be wrong then pretend like I have the answer because if I have the answer and I'd never know the reality like I would never know the answer and I don't mean this like can Google the answer if I have to and pretend that I have the answer but I

1:07:34

rather not do that I'm okay with not having the answers cuz I learn it when I if I ask the question yeah I love that advice uh second question what's the worst advice you've ever heard or received it was very simple I think it's and that left a big impression on me it was very simple like why can't I do that

1:07:52

it's because you're a girl somebody said that to me so it didn't make sense to me I think I was very young it was a very simple thing about maybe going out somewhere or something why can't I do that because you're a girl have you felt that continue in any part of your career that

1:08:10

was yeah um that kind of judgment and like I said not off late not not that I can remember in any specific way I'm sure many people have though uh it's continuous but not something that I've experienced off late that I can remember very clearly Yeah question number three how did you choose the name Raha I think

1:08:29

so this was when both R and I were you know like eager parents asking we have family group asking all the family members to give both boys and girls names so we're prepared so we can zero down on like a girl name and a boy name um so there were multiple boy names and multiple girl names and um we really

1:08:49

liked one boy name we said okay this is a lovely boy name um which I'm not going to reveal now and we said okay this name is lovely now any more girl and then my mother-in-law Ren's mom suggested what about Raha it'll go very well with the boy name as well if you ever have a boy you know and a girl if you

1:09:11

have a boy and girl both it'll be a really good combination and then she suggested a girl and girl combination as well but rir and I instantly loved yeah Raha so we had two names just boy and girl ready I love it does there have a meaning is there a meaning by it Raha yeah Raha means peace it means Joy it

1:09:30

means bliss all all the things that she is to us yeah it's beautiful I love that it's a beautiful name it's so unique as well it's really nice uh question number four if you had to Define this chapter of your life in one word or one sentence what would you call it growth in what way you know there's a feeling where

1:09:51

where you feel like your purpose is perhaps cuz it's about on purpose so your purpose is perhaps outward you know need to achieve this need to do that need you know need to this chapter of my life is very is very Inward and not like I'm actively feel like there's a need for it I'm just finding myself being way

1:10:14

more interested in growth in the different facets of my life M as a parent as a partner as a friend as a person as a professional I'm eager to grow yeah you know not change anything majorly but really grow nice what's something you wish people knew about you that maybe they don't know I think most

1:10:36

people know I'm random and um strange and all those things um but there's this friends has really impacted me the the TV show Friends and there's this one episode where Phoebe is being proposed to by her partner oh my God what's his name Dan one of them her final partner and he said phoe buet I love you you are this

1:11:01

you are that and you're so wonderfully weird I think that's the one thing that really stuck with me is because I want people to accept all the wonderfully weird parts of them as I do of mine I love that you know I don't think anybody's perfect or has has everything in order or does everything correctly or

1:11:21

like right or whatever um but I love being wonderfully weird I think I take pride in that yeah I love that I love that uh I've got two more questions I've added a couple in because I got so curious again uh what's what's your current dream what's you said you're a dreamer at the start what

1:11:39

do you dream of now I'm a very passionate um actor professional producer I mean I I'm passionate about that so I have dreams with regards to my work which I don't think ever ends you know and I don't think I'm ever comfortable and I and I really like that about my mind you know um so I had a film released that last

1:12:07

year that didn't do really well and that's given me a new Vigor for a new dream you know to try and do over you know it it's something that really that I feel very charged by so that's the professional dream and I think again to just soak up as many moments as I can with my family with my

1:12:30

daughter and um if possible this year take a solo trip nice yeah alone for four days yeah I think rir and I both both discusted we both were very excited about it I said you know we both like carve out a time where you take like 4 days on your own and I take four days on my own and let's

1:12:50

see what happens there where did this come from I don't know it came from us actually not not doing it in a really long while and both of us are like we're home bodies and Loan bodies you know like we like to loan around on our owns on our owns on our own um and we both Thrive um individ like together but

1:13:10

individually as well yeah I love that any ideas where you'd go not sure okay we literally had this conversation two weeks ago any any types of places that call to you like not even actual locations but do you know what kind of I'm a I'm a fish pisan so I love the water so it would have to be a beach location cuz

1:13:31

I love the water and the Sun and I would take many books and I would read them and I would finish them you know things like that so that's the that is the dream again it's a great very comfortable dream to have yeah are you big in the star signs oh huge okay so yeah because you said that Rah is a

1:13:48

scorpion yeah raaj scorpion P what Daye is your birthday 15th of March 15th March I'm a number six and so is my daughter she's number six born on the year of six wow so I'm very into numbers and thanks to Punit my makeup artist who is also my dear friend she actually got me very influenced um into this whole

1:14:10

astrology numbers situation teach us something show tell us that no no it's not like I have the I don't have the I don't have the but I know that and what's run beer he's he's a libran okay okay yeah I just love finding similarities between you know star signs and people and numbers it'll just

1:14:29

naturally happen that I get along really well with number sixes you know my best friend ion is a number six three six and nine explain how you get the six for those who don't know the birth date or the birth um like the day and the month and the year so if I'm born on the 6th you are born on the sixth six September

1:14:49

you're a number six I'm Virgo yeah does that make me a six see that's why we could have look that's what I'm saying that's why we could have a conversation got it got it okay so yeah if I'm born on the sixth number six yes yeah okay got it you're number six and then there's your there's your moon sign and

1:15:03

your star sign and your sun sign and then that's little it's a little complicated I'm like looking at pun right now because whatever um I'm a burger yes a lot of my my best friends are Vos all my best friends are Pisces my sister's Pisces my best friend from my weddings of Pisces like March is like

1:15:21

all my best friends are basically born between 8th to 18th of March this that's why we're having this conversation like so easily and apparently this year is very good for 3 six and N that's what I had too and and cancerians and whatever and viros and viros andos sorry so we are now getting

1:15:39

into a completely different conversation but I'm very into this and I love finding similarities like I said my brain loves information so I love putting these things together and then there's an answer you know it's ready for you this all makes sense you know it's all it's all laid out for you I

1:15:56

love it when did this Fascination start I think when when when I started working with pun and she would talk a lot about it so then I would listen and then I would um the minute I start seeing result in in in the similarities I would be like wow that's true you know they're here there's an example like Mr bansali San bansali he's

1:16:15

a number six as well oh wow and he's a pisan yeah right and we we got along like a house on fire so and even like my my best friends you know they're all either threes or nines or I very rarely get along with the four no offense to a four but I very rarely get along with four yeah I I

1:16:38

found it shocking when I realized because obviously I've moved as well so like all my best friends whether I was living in New York London or LA are all born in March like it was fascinating to me I was like it just happened that way yeah and then you're like wait how does that work and so I don't know about it

1:16:55

but so my sister Puja she's also a number six born on the 24th of February yeah uh also a pison she sent me this book and the March the month that I was born and it's so weird again it's all in this in the science right because I keep saying I'm a dreamer I'm a dreamer I'm a dreamer so she sent me this book of each

1:17:13

week has like a certain theme to it you know somebody's the the perfectionist the the the balance and the something mine was the dancers and dreamers oh wow and I was like this is so strange because this is not something that I've read anywhere I've just said it you know maybe it was

1:17:33

on a on a t-shirt or something I see or saw it and I liked it I don't know but it resonated with me yeah yeah yeah so I like finding these similarities what are these other hidden passions weird little quirks or things that you find fascinating I love planning okay you know I vacations or what both both I

1:17:53

just that's a solo trip I love love planning it deeply fascinates me and like satisfies me there's like a hidden desire for me to be a wedding planner yeah oh have you ever planned it did you plan your own I did plan my own yeah of course I think I did it really well um what did you do really well what what

1:18:10

what did you nail I think the most important thing in a wedding is food I agree and my wife would agree to you yeah so I nailed the food I didn't nail it yeah my chef nailed it um as in the catering uh service that we we hired um people want food and they want a great Vibe and um yeah I think it starts with

1:18:31

food yeah genuinely so but just also like colors and combination and like you know like different themes and different so I really have in know desire like you see me getting all excited talking about to be a wedding planner so I'm telling my sister whenever she gets married I'm

1:18:47

planning her wedding and she's not hiring a wedding planner I love that I love that and yeah planning your 4-day trip will be fun too yeah that would be fun actually I might not I might take a break from planning on that okay specific trip but I think because it comes from my need to micromanage when

1:19:02

there are multiple people cuz right now for for our new year vacation we were like 20 people you know in puket and I planned it from start to finish and then when people are commending my planning and they're like you know you did such a lovely job and all that I'm like thank you thank you thank you very much it's

1:19:18

the biggest compliment that I can receive I love it I love it uh Fifth and final question if you could create one law that everyone in the world had to follow what would it be I think to just be kind I love it Al but thank you so much I'm so grateful thank you for your generous time I was looking forward to

1:19:38

doing this for a long time I'm glad we did it look forward to connecting with you again in LA and in your house with food with food yes my wife that's what she does so there's never any lack of food in our home I remember most most moments in life over food through food right we should eat and do this

1:19:56

but uh no look forward to welcoming you and ran Reen beer over and uh thank you so much for your time so if you love this episode I need you to listen to one of my favorite conversations ever it's with the one and only Tom Holland on how to overcome your social anxiety especially in situations where you're

1:20:14

not drinking and everyone else is we talk about his sobriety journey and so much more he gets really personal I can't wait for you to hear it it's going to blow your mind the quote is if you have a problem with me text me and if you don't have my number you don't know me well enough to have a problem with me